The Dragon Prince's Bride
Chapter 185. Do you really love me?

Chapter 185: 185. Do you really love me?

BY the gods, he had not meant to say those words. He really hadn’t... He meant it, the words were sincere, but he never meant to say them out loud at least not yet. He had already confessed too much to her. He had given her too much of himself and those words were the last things he would have held back. They were the very last things he should never have given to her, he meant to keep those words in his heart all to himself. At least for now.

But then his eyes had gotten lost in her, his head and mind had been clouded in that small second where he had thought it in his heart that he loved her, only it hadn’t been the voice in his head speaking.

He didn’t realize he had really said the words out loud until she had paused and stared at him. Then, he realized it... His mistake. One he wasn’t supposed to make and he knew not what to do. All he could think of was running away from her eyes at that particular moment.

So he muttered whatever came to his lips and rose to his feet, only to be held back by her. Her small hands that barely wrapped around his body properly held him so firmly that he could not move. He felt the softness of her body press upon his hardened own and his eyes closed tightly as he realized regretfully that he had been caught.

""Don’t leave..."" She said in tragonian and he felt it. He felt himself sinking into the net she had woven for him. The net if surrender ""Not after saying those words."" she said and his hands could not help but wrap around hers that held his waist.

"You cannot take back those words... Why would you say something like that and pretend to never have said it? Do not take it back... No, I don’t want you to take it back... Even though you do not mean it, don’t take it—"

"I meant it." He confessed... "I meant it Neriah, but I never meant for you to hear it." He told her the truth.

"I know." She held him with more pressure, "But I already heard you, so you cannot take it back." He felt her turn her forehead from his back and rested her cheek there instead.

"I can tell you did not want to say those words, but you already did and I heard it, so you cannot take them back... don’t take them back, please. Just tell me—" She begged him.

His hand that touched hers held a firmer grip as his eyes gazed upon the small hands that had stopped him and was holding him down. What did she want from him? What could she possibly want from him?

"What? Tell you what?" He asked.

"Is it the truth?" She suddenly asked. "After all I have done, after all the troubles I have caused you, after all my stupid lies... Do you really mean that?" She asked. "Do you mean those words? Are they sincere?" She asked.

"I_I did not mean for you to hear them." He said again. He could not think of any right answer to give her.

"I know... But still, tell me. Do you really..." She paused and he felt her hold tighten, "love me? Do you love me, even when—" again she paused and again her hold on him became tighter. "even when you know all my secrets? All the dirtiest and darkest secrets?"

Even before he told her, she knew those words had come out of his mouth as a mistake. The look on his eyes said it all. That shocked expression on his face after he told her those words was a big evidence that he had said those words unconsciously.

But still, she needed to know. She just had to know if those words had been real. Because only after she heard him whisper those words did she finally understand herself.

She had not wanted to acknowledge it, she had not wanted to accept it. She had tried to give it a different name if possible, but after his confession, she had realized it. There was no other name for it...

It was Love. It had to be love.

That would explain everything. Why she was so drawn to him, why she never wanted to be away from him, why the sound of his voice was enough to turn her insides in a sweet manner, why his gaze burned her in the most pleasant manner. Everything finally made sense.

She now understood why she hated him being angry with her, and why she hated it when he didn’t believe her. Neriah could finally understand the reason she had been so joyed when she found out she was having his baby. It was all adding up. The reason she had prayed for his safe return and why she wanted nothing more but to be drowned in his embrace...

It was Love indeed.

But was this how love was supposed to be? It was nothing like what she felt for Lyle. That was one reason why she had not tagged her feelings for her husband as love before, because it was nothing like what she felt for Lyle and she had believed she loved Lyle.

This love was different. This was painful and mild at the same time, bitter and sweet, rough and tender. This love hurt and also healed.

At times she hated him but even in that hate she wanted to be near him. Sometimes he made her so angry that all she wanted to do was strangle him if she could and yet at the same time the thought of kissing him was enough to quell her anger.

This was not the love she had known, so she was confused at first, but not any longer. She knew it now... She was in love with her husband. But could he really love her too? After all she had done?

"Can you really love me?" She asked the question again and this time she felt his arm gently release hers from his waist and he turned around still holding her hands in his own.

"Spitfire," She was so used to him calling her that name that she lifted her lashes naturally to meet his gaze. Her neck craned backwards completely as she stared at him and it made him smile.

His hand came around her waist and he lifted her off the ground, placing her on a high table so she could stare at him without straining her neck.

"Neriah," He called again as he stood between her legs with his hand still on her waist and hers on the table where she sat.

"Do you want me to love you?" His fingers thoughtlessly began to arrange her hair over her naked breasts while his eyes remained on hers.

"Aye." She said without hesitating.

"Why?" He asked her.

"Because if you do, I do not believe anybody can love me better." She confessed and he stared at her for a few seconds, his fingers still caressing her hair like it was the most natural thing to do.

Barak thought to himself, she might be lying, but it was just the kind of lie he was ready to listen to and believe. He did not want to think too much about it. Maybe he had been thinking too much all this while. Maybe if he had always just confessed how he felt earlier on, most of their troubles would have been non-existent.

There was really no point in holding anything back right now... He had already said it, taking it back would be the most cowardly thing to do. "Riah, I want you, every hour of the day. Even when you do not want me, I want you, even when you hate me, I still want you."

"Barak—"

"When you wish for nothing but a knife straight through my heart, I want you even more. My dear Spitfire," His fingers rose to her face and calmly stroked her cheek. "I cannot think of any other words to explain this feeling, so when you ask me if I can really love you, flaws and all, I have no other words to tell you but yes." Neriah had no idea when tears had welled up in her eyes, all she knew was that his face had become blurred. Not until the tears trickled down her cheek and he wiped it with his thumb did she realize she had been crying.

"I cannot stop myself from loving you and although I did not mean for you to know this yet, now that you know, I will not hide it. I love you, Princess Neriah of Avelah and do not wish to have or love another."

"So now that you know, if I ask you to be my wife, mine and mine alone, body, mind, soul and heart, if I ask that you give me all of it, will you do it? Will you be mine, now until our breaths are taken from our lungs? Not because you are forced to, but because you want to. Will you be my wife?"

Indeed, Neriah thought to herself... There was no one like her husband. No one like Barak Der Drache. And she wanted no one but him.

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