My Eldritch Horror Wife Followed Me To Another World
Chapter 89: Bullshit

Chapter 89: Bullshit

Lily didn’t know how to explain magic to someone who didn’t know what it was, so she turned to the others for help. Vafrid just looked at her. Mijko shrugged and shook her head.

Lily was the magic-obsessed one. If she couldn’t explain it, no one could. She was left without a choice and was forced to turn to Squawks.

Squawks sighed and turned to Nick with a serious expression.

"Magic is bullshit." He held up a hand to stop Lily from complaining about his explanation.

"When you’re winning a fight and the other side takes out a guy who can chuck a tree at you. That’s magic. When you’re planning an ambush, but the enemy has set up a trap because a dork in a robe told them about it before you even had the idea. That’s magic. When you attack someone and your weapon passes right through them like they’re made of water. That’s magic."

Lily blinked. It was just a few examples of the many things that magic could do in a setting limited to combat. But they were good examples. She was surprised at how well Squawks managed to live up to the explanation that magic was bullshit.

When he put it like that, he made a very good point.

Nick narrowed his eyes.

When he heard about and started thinking about magic, he thought it would be more like wizards in robes chanting spells and shooting balls of light or fire out of their flimsy wands.

That didn’t quite align with Squawks’ explanation.

"I see. And magic artifacts?"

"Dohickeys with bullshit propped into them," Squawks explained.

"I see. And magic books?"

"No idea. You’ll have to ask Lily about that."

Nick turned to Lily, but she just gave him a blank look and shrugged. She didn’t know what magic books were. She had just wondered if his books were magical.

"So, my suddenly appearing here without explanation probably counts as magic, then?" Nick asked curiously. It didn’t seem like the definition of magic was very strict.

Squawks nodded.

"That sounds reasonable." Squawks was tempted to say that it sounded like bullshit and thus reasonable, but he felt it would be rude and held back.

"Neat but a little disappointing, I guess." Nick sighed. It gave him some clarity into the way the Ursa family had first looked at him when they came by to look for Kai back then.

If they thought he was a mage who could make himself and his house suddenly appear like that, he could probably do other stuff with magic or do it again on top of their heads. It was just a shame that he had nothing to do with his teleportation to another world. He didn’t know a lick about magic.

And it didn’t seem like magic was something that could be studied or learned, as was often the case in stories and movies. In most of those fictional worlds, talent or something was a prerequisite, but Nick had no idea if that was the case here.

"Disappointing?" Lily questioned, hints of anger creeping onto her face.

"Do you think that’s all there is to magic?" She demanded.

"No. It’s just...How is one supposed to learn magic?"

Lily blinked. She had the answer to that.

"That part’s bullshit as well. It’s random."

"Random?" Nick questioned. In what world did that make sense?

Squawks and Lily nodded.

"To be exact, you can increase your odds with power crystals, but—"

Nick held up a hand and interrupted Lily.

"What’s a power crystal?"

"Uhh..." This time, all four of his visitors stared at Nick as if he were an alien, which wasn’t exactly wrong. How could he live life and not know what a power crystal was?

Sure, they were rare, and most families would be lucky if they even had an inferior one. They also weren’t a big part of the lives of those who had them, at least not actively. They were just there.

With a dazed expression, Squawks pulled out a necklace from under his shirt that held a fingertip piece of white stone.

’Quartz?’ Nick squinted as he looked at it. It didn’t seem that special.

"H-have you never seen one of these before?" Squawks asked, fearing the answer.

Nick glanced at the others’ expressions.

He didn’t think it would be a big deal if they figured out he was from another world. But just in case...

"Oh, those power crystals!" He laughed and slapped his knee. "Of course, I’ve heard of them. I just had a brainfart."

"..."

Nick cleared his throat and avoided their gazes. It didn’t seem like he had fooled them.

"...Increased exposure to power crystals increases your odds of unlocking magic."

Fortunately, they didn’t seem to want to press the issue, and Lily finished her explanation.

Nick glanced at the power crystal in Squawks’ hand.

The way Lily talked about exposure made it sound like it was radioactive or something, but it should be fine if Squawks carried it by his chest like that. Nick wanted one for himself. He wanted magic.

But asking where he could get one probably wasn’t a good idea.

’Eh, fuck it. They’re already onto me.’

"And where does one happen to get a hold of one of these power crystals?" He asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

"..." Squawks and the others just looked at Nick.

Squawks sighed.

"Here and there."

"’Here and there’?" Nick questioned. What kind of bum answer was that?

"If you’re extremely lucky, you can stumble upon one when you’re taking a stroll. If you’re rich, you can buy one. If you’re a miner, you can dig a hole," Lily explained. It was a little better, but it was basically the same. They were telling Nick that if he didn’t already have one, he should just give up.

"I don’t think you need one, Nick." However, Mijko said something that only Vafrid understood.

"Huh?"

"Why do you think everyone wants to live in the center of the forest? For the pretty trees? If that were it, everyone would want to live with the Segs.

"No, the center of the forest is rich with power. Whether it’s because of a bunch of crystals in the ground or if it’s just a hotspot...I have no idea. But there’s a reason why the powerful monster kings are powerful and live in the center of the forest."

Nick’s eyes widened.

Was she saying that he might already be primed and ready to unlock magic?

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