[BL] Accidentally Becoming the Healer of the Deranged Archduke
Chapter 318: Was It Worth It?

Chapter 318: Was It Worth It?

Useless trash! You are of no value to our family, only a stain!

Voices from people and his family he hadn’t heard in years echoed in the deep recesses of his mind. They sneered, taunting his fragility, jeering at his stupid self who had gone ahead to save others and ended up in a terrible situation.

Was that worth it, Xion? Was risking your own life worth it?

Minato-sensei’s voice lingered in his thoughts, sharpening the regret gnawing at every decision he’d ever made.

In his chaotic mind, he forgot that Minato-sensei would never say something like that. The old man would have smiled with his wrinkled face and would have praised him gently, for his courage and soulful heart.

But the cruel voices only grew louder.

"No," he mumbled with the numbing desperation. "I can’t. I don’t want to get used to this blindness."

Shaking his head in denial, he picked himself up again.

He took a deep breath and forced his legs to move toward where he assumed the door was.

"You are fine. You can do it. You can fight anyone."

Then he collided right into the table, and though he couldn’t properly see it, he felt the papers fall onto the floor in disarray.

These were the research papers he had painstakingly written just a few days ago.

The spherical crystal lamp rolled onto the ground, making a heavy noise as it tumbled before crashing into the closed doors.

Xion gulped. His throat ached from the amount of time he had suppressed the pained scream trying to rip apart from his vocal cords.

He walked again, stepping directly onto the ink-covered paper.

Thinking of something, he abruptly halted.

Cold seeped into his delicate soles turning them red, and yet Xion found himself unable to move.

He became reluctant to show this side to Darius. Surely if he managed to suppress it, if he got used to what little vision he had, he would be able to pretend to be fine, right?

All he had to do was wait for his system to become activated again. Even if it couldn’t restore his eyes back to their previous state, it would at least offer him something that would save him the pain of bumping into random things.

So, Xion with his long lashes cast downward turned around.

But whether it was a day or night, the time seemed to be against him. He slipped right onto the scattered papers and fell heavily.

All the tussle his body had gone through after waking up had consumed what little strength he had.

He lay there, curling into himself, silently wishing for the earth to break apart so he could bury himself in it.

The doors opened with a thud letting a stream of light inside. Even without lifting his head, Xion could tell that whoever had come inside was in a hurry.

The heavy footsteps thrashed against the floor, but Xion remained still.

"Xion?!"

In the next second, he was picked up by the strong arms. "Are you alright? Did you get hurt?"

Amidst the haze of darkness shrouding his vision, he easily recognized the blinding silver of Darius’ hair.

They are pretty. Xion wondered if he would be able to comb it again. Though he couldn’t bring himself to look at it directly for now.

Without uttering a single word, he let the Archduke carry him to bed.

The heat of that embrace as Darius cradled him against his chest mended something broken in Xion.

The voices clamoring in his mind turned silent all of a sudden, allowing him to breathe in the rich aroma of cedar.

He nuzzled into Darius’ neck, filling his lungs with the woody smokiness. The heaviness in his mind seemed to lift off as he felt the Archduke patting his back gently.

"Sweetheart?" Darius tried again, carefully calling while wrapping them both with the duvet.

Xion was terribly hot. Just as Allen had warned Darius, he was running a high fever.

"Where are you hurt? Is it because of your fever? Or are you mad at me that I wasn’t here with you?"

Xion’s lips parted to reply, to say that he was fine, but words refused to follow his wishes.

His lack of vision, the voices, the falling... It was far too much for him to bear.

When Darius so gently asked his frustration reached his peak, and he sobbed.

"D-Darius..." That was all he could utter and the dam he had built with so much effort broke down.

The chain of tears rolled down his cheeks, wetting Darius’ shoulder as he cried.

It wasn’t the soft sobs or the slight shaking of his shoulders. Xion was wailing loudly. Like a child who finally had found his backer, he released the flood of emotions without any pretense.

The Archduke could only gently cradle Xion in his arms, planting small chaste kisses on his burning forehead.

"I am here, Xion. No need to be afraid." Big palm patted softly at the trembling back. "I am here. I will always be with you. No one would ever harm you again. I promise."

Though it took nearly half an hour for Xion to calm down, the sweet nothings Darius whispered in his ear worked their magic.

Even then Darius didn’t put Xion down. He held his lover closer to his chest as his fingers rubbed the delicate neck up and down.

He could feel the heart beating in proper rhythm as it should. It wasn’t so weak as it had been three days ago.

Xion was awake. His little lord was finally willing to open his eyes and look at him.

Was that not the happiest thing in the world?

"Darius?" Xion mumbled against Archduke’s chest.

"Yes, sweetheart? Do you need water? You should drink something."

"I-I can’t see anything."

Those words, said in such a soft and gentle voice detonated another explosion in Darius’ head.

And the fallout of that explosion was something the royal family would bear in the hardest possible way.

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