Beast Alpha and His Cursed Luna
Chapter 268: Not deserving

Chapter 268: Not deserving

MAVERICK’S POV

Her call went on for quite some time.

Once she finished her call, she walked back to me and smiled as soon as she saw the food on the table.

"Thank God, the food is already here. I was famished. What has Shadow brought? Dang, it’s all my favorite things. He surely knows my taste well now," Valencia smiled, her eyes crinkling into a crescent moon shape.

It was the kind of smile I liked on her face, the one that made me feel for her, but her eyes...

I held her hand when she was about to pick up the container with the steamed bun.

I knew what I would do might end terribly for us, but this was the only way.

If she has to hate me after this, she can, but I won’t allow her to hate herself forever.

I know she hated the feeling, but I wanted her to feel vulnerable. I wanted her to show me her emotions because that was the only way to get out of the shell she was creating around herself.

"How are you feeling, Valencia?" I asked.

Valencia scoffed.

"What kind of question is it? How do I look? Of course, I am happy to see all this delicious food and—" Valencia started, but I held her shoulders and forced her to look into my eyes, something she had avoided from the moment she let me inside the room.

"How are you feeling, Valencia? How are you feeling in your heart? Are your wounds deep? Do you feel agony?" I asked.

I saw her gaze wavering.

However, she still tried to mask it behind her smile and tried to avert her gaze from me.

I was persistent too.

"I mean to ask, are you okay, my love?" I asked, letting my vulnerability surface before her.

I showed her my weak side so she would know it was okay to be weak. It was okay to cry, to wail, to scream her emotions out before me.

Valencia hesitated before she nodded.

"I... I... I am alright. What would be wrong with me? I know you think I am a weakling. But I am not. I have gone through so much and tackled everything alone. This is... This was..." she stuck and took a deep, shaky breath.

"This was nothing. I am... I am..." she tried, but I could see her eyes tearing up, and my heart broke for her.

I pulled her in for a hug, and she immediately wrapped her hands around me.

She sobbed into my arms, hiccuping loudly as she cried.

"I am not fine. I hate it! I...hate...that I was so weak. I... Why does it have to be me all the time? Why can’t I... I... Am I so cursed? My wolf... She didn’t even let me shift and... Aa!" She screamed in pain.

My eyes teared up hearing her words.

I wanted to tell her everything was fine now. No one was going to touch her. She need not feel humiliated because everyone who touched her was dead, and they wouldn’t be able to hurt her anymore.

Valencia pushed herself away from me before she covered her face with her hands.

I sat there, keeping my distance from her, letting her deal with her emotions and embrace what she was supposed to feel.

"They... He said he wanted to taste me. They used to do the same back in the pack, too. Though things never went this far, but... What did I do to deserve this? Why me? Am I not lovable? Am I not the moon goddess’s daughter? I... Why do I have to be cursed? I want to be like a normal female too," Valencia cried.

She slid down from the couch and placed her head on her knees, hiding her face from me as she kept talking about how unlucky she was.

She kept screaming, crying, wailing, cursing her fate and dignity, and I let her.

Seeing her crying was making me emotional.

I touched my cheeks and felt the wetness before sighing.

’You are telling her it’s okay to feel weak and it was okay to cry, but what about you? Do these principles don’t apply to you?’ Reaper asked me.

I shook my head at him. They didn’t.

I was an alpha. My dad always said I was supposed to be a shield for the people I love and care about, and a shield can’t be weak.

I can’t allow myself to feel such emotions. If I started crying, too, who would Valencia lean on? If I start crying, how will I make her believe I will protect her?

No. I can’t allow myself to feel emotional. The only reason these tears were rolling down my eyes was because I... My thoughts paused when she suddenly held my legs.

She placed her head on my knees as she continued to cry, and my heart softened for her.

"I hate myself. I am sorry for being so weak. You deserve so much better. You had to go through so much because of me. I was born to suffer. I am cursed, and I will only bring miseries into your life, too. You should stay away from me. Maybe that Amelia girl is the right person for you. Let’s not meet again. I am sorry," Valencia stood from her place.

I sat there frozen for a few seconds, unsure how her emotions turned so quickly.

How could she decide she wasn’t enough for me? I have told her so many times that she was the only girl for me and that I loved her with everything inside me. I won’t let anyone else near me apart from her. She was the woman who was going to marry me, claim me, and have my kids.

Then, after all those things, how could she say she wasn’t the right girl for me? After everything we went through together, we made love to each other so many times.

Was it so easy? Her self-deprecating thoughts blinded her. I could see that, but how could she decide such a thing for...

Seeing her walking to the hotel room door, I knew I had to stand and stop her. I had to move from the couch, hold her hand, and stop her.

I knew that, but I couldn’t move from my place for some reason. It was as if some kind of external force was stopping me in my place.

I gulped.

"Val-" I tried to speak, but no word came out of my mouth.

My body felt powerless.