The world has turned into Hell's Game, why should I stay human?
Chapter 159 Firing at Hemorrhoids Toward the Sewer

Chapter 159: Chapter 159 Firing at Hemorrhoids Toward the Sewer

"Are you sure? With your current state, not to mention a perfect score, even passing would be very difficult,"

the Fisherman reminded him.

"No worries, I have a way,"

Liu Zheng said confidently.

"Well, let me say this upfront: if you really don’t pass, I can’t stop the sewer from killing you. At most, I can help preserve your corpse,"

the Fisherman said.

"Alright, enough chit-chat, let’s get started,"

he said.

There were only four hours in total, and he still needed to set aside time to communicate with the Fire Mage.

"Then sit in the plane, and I’ll fill you in on the details,"

the Fisherman didn’t try to dissuade him further.

Liu Zheng jumped onto the plane, and under the tremendous impact, the plane didn’t move an inch.

But that was to be expected. How could anything that serves to smooth the flow through the sewer be truly crappy?

"Grab the steering wheel,"

the Fisherman said.

He grabbed the steering wheel, and the scenery in front of his eyes immediately changed.

Looking around, the surroundings were no longer the blue-gray walls and the rusted, yellow pipes, but an endless space.

Beneath his feet was no longer the colorful sewage but a long runway.

"I won’t go into the generic ways to play, just the important stuff,"

"There are four kinds of enemies."

"One type is the Shit Meteorite, which comes in various sizes and consistencies; there are also mutant elites. Anyway, just shatter them when you see them, and you score points for each one shattered,"

"Another type is the intestinal star belt. You can’t shatter these nor can you collide with them. However, there might be Shit Meteorites mixed within them, and if you can shatter them without damaging the intestinal star belt, you get extra points. Oh, and by using a bomb you can blow up those Shit Meteorites without harming the intestinal star belt,"

"A third type is the Crap Galaxy. Ordinary bullets don’t work against it, only bombs. So you need to conserve your bombs,"

"The last type is the garbage meteor shower, which is very rare, but you can also get points for destroying them,"

"However, there might be items mixed in with them, so whether you take the risk to grab the items is up to you,"

"These four types of enemies are very easy to recognize, you just can’t miss them unless you’re blind,"

the Fisherman said.

"Is there no BOSS?"

"There is, but the number and types of BOSSes that appear each time vary, so there’s no point talking about them,"

"But if I had to say, the more a BOSS resembles shit, the higher its health. The more it resembles intestines, the fewer hit points it has. The more it resembles dung, the more types of bullet patterns it has. And the more it looks like trash, the higher the frequency and the number of bullet patterns,"

the Fisherman added after thinking.

"Got it."

"You just have to press the red button in the middle of the steering wheel, and the game will start,"

the Fisherman said.

"Okay,"

Liu Zheng answered, but his next move wasn’t to press the button; instead, he pulled out a shiny golden finger.

"Name: Golden Finger (Disposable)"

"Type: Item"

"Quality: Perfect"

"Effect: Use at the right time to choose one out of three random cheats."

"Note: As a disciple of the Wind Spirit Moon Shadow Sect, I’ve never known what ’game difficulty’ means."

"Can it be taken out of the instance: Yes"

This perfect quality, one-time-use item had been taken out by him every now and then, but always just to intimidate.

But this time, he was really going to use it.

No choice, the sewer was so vast, and relying on the little time he had delivering takeout to find someone was barely feasible before the instance ended.

Although Liu Zheng also had a tendency to hoard like a squirrel party member, he could be ruthless when it mattered.

Could he?

He held the Golden Finger, his face struggling.

This was a perfect quality, one-time-use item. If he had ever obtained such an item in a game, he would never use it even if it meant finishing the game.

Or rather, the significance of owning such an item was in the ownership itself.

Unfortunately, he didn’t even know if a game like Hell’s Game had a concept of finishing.

"Sigh."

Liu Zheng heaved a long sigh. The Golden Finger morphed into a streak of light, merging into his body.

"Golden Finger has been used successfully, detecting usage scenario."

"Detection completed, extracting cheats."

"Extraction complete, please choose one of the following three cheats."

The system’s voice sounded continuously.

"Cheater one: The plane gains the Invincible Effect."

"Cheater two: The plane’s bullets can be infinitely upgraded."

"Cheater three: The plane’s bombs can be infinitely stacked, and the number of bombs earned is doubled."

"Awesome!"

Liu Zheng sincerely marveled at these three cheats.

It really is a one-time item of perfect quality, its effects are explosively powerful.

But then he fell into agony.

All three cheats were visibly powerful, but he could only choose one.

So, which one to choose?

He thought it over, and first, Liu Zheng ruled out cheater one.

Plane invincibility was certainly strong, if his goal was to pass, he would definitely choose it.

But his goal now was to complete with a perfect score, and plane invincibility seemed inadequate.

After all, neither the intestinal star belt that couldn’t be shattered nor the Shit Galaxy that could only be taken out with bombs were issues the plane’s invincibility could solve.

Cheater two was also dismissed after Liu Zheng gave it some thought.

Infinite bullet upgrades were definitely awesome, and later on, the entire screen could be filled with his bullets, killing enemies as soon as they showed up.

But therein lay the problem.

Once there were too many bullets, he wouldn’t be able to ensure that only the Shit Meteorites were hit without damaging the intestinal star belt.

So, after some deep thought, Liu Zheng chose cheater three.

Bombs could be used on all enemies, and the doubling of bomb quantity along with infinite stacking greatly enhanced the bombs’ flexibility.

"Cheater three loaded successfully."

With the system’s prompt, he slammed the red button with force.

Wind Shadow Immortal, boundless magical power!

"Ready~ Set, GO!"

With a Japanese-accented English prompt, the game began.

The plane automatically started, quickly took off from the runway, and flew into the boundless space.

As the distance flown increased, those distant stars came closer and closer.

Only then did Liu Zheng realize that those so-called stars were actually huge meatballs.

These meatballs were not of a regular oval shape, and they differed in form.

Some were long and strip-shaped, others were semicircular, and some were several meatballs fused together, blooming like petals.

And their colors varied too, some were bright red, some were dark red, while others were black.

"Could this be the hemorrhoids of the sewer?"

Liu Zheng muttered to himself.

The more he pondered, the more he felt he had uncovered the truth.

"Speaking of which, what would happen if I blasted these hemorrhoids to smithereens?"

A thought struck him.

"I advise you not to even think about it. If you dare blow up the sewers’ hemorrhoids again, not even the City Hall could save you."

The Fisherman’s voice echoed in his ear.

"Can you monitor in real-time?"

Liu Zheng exclaimed in surprise.

"No, I’ll be kicked out as soon as the first wave of enemies shows up,"

The Fisherman said.

"Well, it can’t be comfortable with all those hemorrhoids, can it? One should not conceal their sickness for fear of treatment."

He was shooting the breeze while easing his psychological pressure.

"If you could cure its hemorrhoids, that would indeed be a great achievement. But the condition is painless and with good prognosis. Of course, the most important thing is, you need to find a doctor brave enough to operate on the sewer."

"The enemies are coming, fend for yourself."

As the Fisherman’s voice faded, meteorites emerged from the void, hurtling toward Liu Zheng.

These meteorites were the size of a building at their largest, and the size of a fridge at their smallest.

But their shape was uniform, and very familiar to him.

They were long and strip-shaped, steaming hot, and brownish-yellow.

Shit.

"Did I destroy the world in my last life, or create some cosmic karma the life before that?"

Liu Zheng howled as he opened fire, shooting blue laser beams.

He was now wondering about one thing.

Surely his beginner’s instance isn’t the only one this absurd, right?

No way, right?

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