The Empty Box and Zeroth Maria
Book 1: Chapter 19

10,000^th Time

“Stop! Please don’t kill me!”

I don’t plug my ears.

I’m going to kill Haruaki Usui.

He’s the one who suggested it, after all.

I kxxx Haruaki Usui.

That’s when I disappear. The me who was once Kasumi Mogi is gone. I have no hope of finding the version of myself that was ground to dust by the agony of this place and scattered to the wind. My body keeps reviving, regardless. It always comes back, even though there’s nothing left of me inside.

I feel something entering the empty space within me. Something vile born from this Box. Something grotesque beyond belief with a putrid smell like that of countless dead bugs covered in feces. I try to keep it out. I try again and again. But I know that even if I do, this thing will still worm its way in through the holes in my defenses. It’ll tear at my weaknesses like a hyena, devouring those portions and dyeing me pitch-black. Once they’re finished with me, I’ll no longer know who I am. I’ll become a doppelgänger.

But not even that is enough to make me put an end to the Rejecting Classroom.

I still need to greet today with no regrets.

A today where I have no regrets?

“Ah-ha-ha…”

What a fool I am. There’s no such thing. This is my afterlife. No matter what I do here, it’ll never be enough to sever the ties binding me to the real world. Even Kazu professing his love to me will be meaningless. What can I do to satisfy myself in a world that’s completely disconnected, a world with no links to anywhere else? I can’t think of any ideas.

The outcome I desired…

I struggled on for so, so long in search of this outcome within the overriding stagnation of this world.

But the truth is I didn’t even know what I was looking for.

I fumbled along in ignorance for some time before eventually reaching the conclusion that the outcome I sought didn’t exist.

“I want to live.”

Oh, is that it? I finally understand.

So that was my wish.

That also explains why my wish will remain just that—an unfulfilled desire—for all eternity.

My inability to understand all of this warped the Box.

This distorted wish transformed into an obsession that couldn’t be dispelled. It will always be here as long as I’m in the Box.

So the fixation remains, spurring the false me into unceasing action. That’s how I know that, even if I were to vanish, the Box will never, ever end.

27,755^th Time

“I’ll never leave you in this place by yourself!”

Kazu’s words were enough to momentarily bring back the Kasumi Mogi that had been lost.

“I’m so stupid.”

I once made a decision. When all of this started, I told myself that if I lost sight of my purpose, I had to destroy the Box with my own hands before my shameful actions came to light.

But the sheer, overwhelming number of loops in this ceaseless world wore my determination down, diluting it to the point of nonexistence.

All hope of me ever returning should have faded back when I murdered someone whose name I can no longer even recall.

But then…

“With just a few words, a few simple words, I…”

…I was brought back.

My love saved me at the very, very end.

But I know that while I’ve returned for this moment, I’ll lose control again soon.

The Box will consume me, both in mind and body.

That’s why I have to kill myself…while I’m still Kasumi Mogi.

“Good-bye, Kazu.”

And that’s how my Box, which couldn’t bring me happiness—even though it could have been so easy—comes to an end.

I die lying atop the one I love. This could be a blessing in itself. I’m okay with this. Yes, this is perfectly fine.

I close my eyes, sure that they’ll stay closed forever…

“No one said you could die, you know.”

Surprised, I open them again.

Before me stands the mysterious being that gave me the Box. Kazu’s eyes must be locked on me, because he doesn’t seem aware of the presence.

A calm smile greets me as I meet the figure’s gaze.

“I’m not through observing that boy there. I can’t have you putting an end to this wonderful opportunity for unlimited study I’ve worked so hard to arrange.”

What? …What are they talking about?

“Hmm, it might not be enough if we keep to the same routine we have been, though… This goes against my principles, but I’m going to need to borrow that Box of yours for a second. A few adjustments are necessary. You were trying to break it anyway, so you don’t mind, do you?”

Without waiting for a response, the being places a hand upon my chest.

“Agh! Aaaaah!!! Aaaaaaaaah!!!”

I’m instantly filled with agony beyond anything I could imagine. The pain is unbearable, even though I’ve gotten used to being hit by trucks and didn’t even cry out when I stabbed myself in the chest with a knife. This sensation is an entirely different variety. It’s like having my very soul cut to shreds. It’s the sort of pain nothing can alleviate, as if it’s being applied directly to my nerves.

The being smiles as they pull the palm-sized Box from my chest.

“You most likely already know this, but this Box won’t work without you anymore. I’m going to have to put you inside it.”

With those words out of the way, the being begins to fold me up.

I’m doubled over, doubled again, and then put inside the Box.

Kazu. Please, Kazu.

I know what I’m asking is selfish. I know it’s laughable to think I have the right to ask anything of you after all I’ve done. But…I can’t… I can’t take it anymore…

Help me, Kazu…

27,756^th Time

I have to put an end to the Rejecting Classroom and return all our lives to normal.

What’s the hardest part of achieving this goal?

Encountering a crazy obstacle, perhaps? Like having to tightrope between two buildings using a piece of kite string? Or repeating the same day a hundred thousand times?

Maybe not. All of those are hurdles I can figure out how to clear. No matter how impossible they may seem, with an infinite amount of time on my hands, I could feasibly acquire the skills needed to overcome them.

No, the hardest part is being unable to tell what I’m up against. If I don’t even know where to start, then I’m just stuck. What’s more, time doesn’t pass within the confines of the Rejecting Classroom. No matter what kind of a jam I’m in, I’ll never be able to rely on time to solve the problem.

I’m facing the most difficult of situations right now.

“What’s the matter, Hosshi? You seem a bit off today.”

It’s our first period break.Haruaki has an easy smile as he speaks to me.

Class has only just ended, so everyone is still in the room.Mogi is in her seat. All thirty-eight of my classmates are here.

I rack my mind for reasons why everyone who was rejected is here again, only to find I have almost no recollection of the previous transfer. I get the feeling I made an important discovery, but for the life of me, I can’t remember anything.

That’s fine. I can handle that.

If I did find out something of immense importance last time, I can always do it again.

I’m a bit mystified by the return of my classmates, but that doesn’t change what I have to do.

That isn’t the problem at all.

“Ugh, I’m so bored today… Nothing ever changes.”

Nothing ever changes.

Kokone’s words spark a dull pain in my chest.

I don’t want to believe it. I can’t accept the situation before me.

“Hey, Daiya.”

As if issuing a plea for help, I call out to my friend.

He remains sitting, turning only his head to look at me.

“Have you heard anything about a transfer student arriving today?”

Despite my faint hope that he would nod, my question is unfortunately met with the exact frown and retort I expect.

“Huh? What the hell are you talking about?”

I knew it. Aya Otonashi will no longer “transfer.”

I’m totally on my own now.

Sure, I can find the owner of the Box, but what am I supposed to do after that? Take the Box from them? Destroy it? How am I supposed to go about doing either of those things?

Before, I thought I was working alongside Maria to solve this mystery, but that was nothing more than my pride talking. The truth is that I was totally reliant on Maria, and without her here, I have no clue what to do.

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