The Empty Box and Zeroth Maria
Book 1: Chapter 10

After dragging me from the classroom, she set me on the rear seat of a large motorcycle, with no helmet. I’m freaking out now because I’ve never experienced speeds like this before, so I’m clinging to Otonashi’s surprisingly slender waist. (Well, actually, it feels just the way it looks, but I can’t help but perceive her as more substantial.) When I ask her in a shaky voice if she has a license, she calmly states that of course she doesn’t.

“I picked it up during all the extra time I’ve had in my lifetime of transfers. Pretty worthwhile, don’t you think?”

She does seem to have a knack for driving. I have to give her that.

I ask her whether she’s acquired any other skills along the way, and her reply is simply “Of course.” She can drive a car, too, as I predicted, but she’s also tried her hand at martial arts, sports, languages, music, and pretty much everything else possible within the confines of the Rejecting Classroom’s repetitions. By this point, she can score near-perfect marks on university admissions exams. She claims she could already score 90 percent on those before the transfers started, though.

Otonashi was a high-caliber individual to begin with, of course, but these 27,754 transfers have given her that much more time to spend improving herself. I can’t do the arithmetic, but if you convert all those loops into days, they add up to around seventy-six years. A person’s birth and death could occur in that span of time. It’s really amazing when you think about it.

“Hey, Otonashi, you’re the same age as me, right?”

Perhaps because of that line of thought, I’m curious about her actual age.

“…No, I’m not.”

“Huh? So then how old are you?”

Otonashi sounds unhappy as she replies. Maybe she doesn’t want to talk about it. I’ve always heard it’s rude to ask a woman’s age, so maybe she’s at the point where it’s impolite to ask.

When I think long and hard about it, no one in my grade should be as mature as Otonashi is. She’s my classmate only because the role of a transfer student is convenient for infiltrating the Rejecting Classroom. Otonashi could be old enough that wearing a school uniform is more like cosplay for her.

“Hoshino, if there are any inappropriate thoughts running through that head of yours, I’ll knock you off this bike right here and now.”

She’s awfully perceptive for someone with her eyes on the road.

“So, um, anyway, you learned how to ride a motorcycle only during all your transfers, right? That means this bike probably wasn’t yours to begin with. Who’s the owner? Your dad, maybe?”

I don’t know much about motorcycles, but this doesn’t seem like the model a lady would ride.

“I don’t know.”

“…Huh?”

“Pretty careless to leave your keys in your bike while it’s just sitting outside your house, don’t you think?”

I can’t argue with that, but does that mean she…?

“Chain locks are easy to break if you have the right tools. This bike is always in the same state every time I transfer. To no one’s surprise.”

I decide not to press the topic any further. I don’t know anything at all. Nope, nothing at all.

“If you lose your memory, will you forget how to drive, along with all the other skills and knowledge you’ve picked up?”

That would be such a huge waste.

“…”

She doesn’t answer.

“Otonashi?”

Still nothing. Maybe…

“Were you also thinking it would be a big waste, Otonashi?”

Maybe the skills and know-how she seems to have picked up at random aren’t all just to kill the time. Not even Otonashi would relish the thought of parting with all these talents. That’s why she doesn’t want to lose her memory.

She pushed herself to master these skills in order to create that reluctance.

And in that case…

It takes a while, but my train of thought finally arrives at the real question:

Why did Otonashi pretend to forget everything?

Our destination is a hotel that, while I wouldn’t exactly call it first-rate, is the most expensive place around here and definitely beyond the means of any high school student.

After checking in with well-practiced ease, Otonashi turns down the bellboy’s offer to show us the way and sets off without a moment’s hesitation.

She plops down on the sofa as soon as we’re in the room.

I sit down on the bed, trying to keep my excitement at being in a luxury hotel in check.

When I think about it, it’s crazy that I’m here alone in a hotel room with a woman. But that woman happens to be Otonashi, so it doesn’t really feel like that kind of situation. In fact, I’m not nervous at all.

“I should’ve figured you’d be rich, too. Or at least you kinda seemed like you would be.”

“Whether I’m wealthy or not doesn’t matter. All the money I spend returns to me with each transfer anyway.”

“…Now that you mention it, that’s true. That means I could go buy every single Umaibo in the convenience store. Awesome!”

“Who cares? We didn’t come here to talk about trivial matters like snacks, did we?”

“N-no, you’re right. What exactly do we need to talk about?”

“The direction we’re going to take from here on out. Now that my theory that you were the one responsible for all this has collapsed, I’m lost at sea here.”

“Sorry about that.”

“Spare me your sarcasm.”

I wasn’t trying to be sarcastic.

“So why not find out who the real culprit is? I know that’s easier said than done, but it seems like losing this preconception that I’m the one responsible is a major development.”

“…Hoshino, I’ve transferred 27,754 times now. Do you understand that?”

“…What do you mean?”

“We talked a bit about this last time. Even if I did wrongly assume you were the culprit, that doesn’t mean I stopped suspecting other people. When I interacted with other possible leads, I always kept the idea that I could be wrong in the forefront of my mind… The fact that I misidentified you as my target only shows that I was still careless, of course.”

“So you didn’t find anyone else as suspicious as I was?”

“That’s right. I’ve been at this over and over for 27,754 times. The only one who wouldn’t show their true colors in all that time would have to be the owner of the Box.”

“Hmm, do you think maybe you were too obvious in your searching, and they figured out you were after them?”

“It’s still not possible. Even if they were on guard, we’re talking about 27,754 times through the cycle here. Are you saying the owner has the smarts and endurance to stay hidden for all that time? Well, the bottom line is I still haven’t been able to find them. Dammit, why? The owner of the Box has to be one of the people who is in the classroom.”

“…Hold on a minute. You’re saying that the culprit has to be in the classroom? It absolutely has to be one of our classmates?”

Now that I think about it, Otonashi did mention last time that there weren’t many suspects.

“No, any teachers and students from other classes who come into room 1-6 are also suspects. As the name suggests, the Rejecting Classroom encompasses exclusively classroom 1-6. The only people caught in this are those who entered that area between March second and March third.”

……? Then why can I leave the classroom and see other people?

“I can tell by your face that you don’t get it. Hoshino,do you really think it’s possible to rewind time?”

“Um…”

What is she getting at? If you deny that idea, then the whole premise of the Rejecting Classroom collapses.

“…But it’s the Box that makes all that possible, right?”

“Correct. It’s possible as long as the Box is there. But what I’m asking here is your opinion. Do you truly believe that having something like the Box would allow time to be rewound at all? Do you believe the phenomenon is possible to begin with?”

I have no clue what Otonashi’s trying to tell me.

“I…”

All I can do is give my honest answer to her questions, without worrying too much about the meaning behind them.

“I think that nothing will change what’s already occurred.”

I’ve wished more times than I can count that I could reverse time. But I don’t think I’d believe in time travel even if time machines were real. Even if I hopped back to the past, I don’t think I would believe it until I saw undeniable proof. Maybe my doubts would persist no matter what sort of proof was presented to me.

I’m not sure if that’s the answer she’s looking for, but Otonashi nods her head with ahmm.

“I think your understanding of things may be normal. Perhaps the one who made the Rejecting Classroom sees things the same way you do.”

“What are you saying?”

“The Box granted their wish to its fullest extent. Completely, to the last little detail. In other words, when it granted the owner’s wish,the Box included their inability to believe it’s possible to rewind time. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“Um…”

You want to reverse time. But at the same time, you don’t think it’s possible. The attempt to reconcile these views probably twists the wish. That’s something I can get my head around.

“So do you think you’re actually being returned to the past?”

“Hoshino, have I ever once expressed this situation as ‘being returned to the past’?”

I’m not sure, mostly because I’ve lost almost all my memories of the time I spent with Otonashi.

“I’ll keep this short. If the Rejecting Classroom was born from someone’s wish to rewind time, it’s a sorry attempt. A work of inferior quality—defective.”

“Okay, then why have you experienced all of this over twenty thousand times?”

“Hmph. Well, that in itself is proof of how broken the classroom is. If time were being rewound perfectly, there’s no reason my memories should be so precisely excluded from what it’s targeting. And even before that, if the repetition is so perfect, why was someone like me who wasn’t originally part of the class able to infiltrate it as a transfer student?”

Otonashi gives me a sidelong glance.

“Knowing you, your thought process probably led you to some cheap notion that anything is possible for me.”

Well, she has me there. No arguing that.

“In short, all I did was sneak inside the Box. I didn’t intend to be treated as a transfer student, for instance. That’s just the role the culprit gave me. The setting of the Rejecting Classroom is room 1-6, so my being a transfer student was the most natural explanation for the sudden appearance of a newcomer who’s roughly the same age as the students. Basically, the culprit’s sense of balance found a way to keep things plausible.”

“…?”

I don’t really get what she means.Keep things plausible? What does that have to do with anything?

“Ugh, why are you always so slow on the uptake? Fine, let’s frame it this way: Say the Rejecting Classroom is a movie directed by the culprit. All the filming is done, so all that’s left is the editing. But then, all of a sudden, the director gets word from the producers that there’s an actor they absolutely have to have in the film for commercial reasons. All the parts have already been cast, but the director can’t just stick the actor on the screen without giving them a role. It would derail the entire production. So the director makes the most minimal of rewrites possible to the screenplay and assigns the actor a part. And that’s how I was made into a transfer student to keep things logical.”

“In other words, the culprit couldn’t keep you from getting into the classroom, so they had to find some way to make you a part of it. They were forced to make you into a sudden transfer student and put together your life for March second. Is that what you mean?”

“Exactly. But even then there was still something off about my presence in the Rejecting Classroom, right? It’s a pain to explain every little detail, so I’ll just jump to the conclusion. This is not reality. Nothing is repeating itself. It’s just a small, isolated space.This is all an ill-conceived ‘wish’ that will continue to exist as long as a single person, even the culprit, believes that time is looping.”

“Uh…and that’s why you were saying that the loop is imperfect?”

“Yes. The one who made the wish doesn’t believe that time can turn back; all they’re doing is refusing to let time move forward. They’re rejecting it. All the owner of the Box needs to do is continue pulling the wool over their own eyes.”

“Does that flaw also explain why you and I can keep our memories?”

“Most likely. Our respective reasons for the ability could be different, but I have no doubt that they’re due to the defects of the Rejecting Classroom.”

There’s one thing I still can’t get my head around.

“So just who are you?”

Otonashi’s displeasure is obvious. I guess she didn’t want to hear that.

“Ah, well…I mean, you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, but…”

Though the scowl never leaves her face, she opens her mouth to speak.

“I don’t have some sort of easy-to-understand title like you’re hoping for. ‘I’m just a student’…is what I would like to say, but I suppose that label hasn’t really applied since a year ago. So what is my role…? I’ve never really given it a name, but there’s probably only one way to put it. I am…”

Otonashi spits out the next words as if it genuinely pains her to do so.

“…a Box.”

“You’re a Box? What do you mean?”

Her brows furrow even more when I parrot her answer back to her in confusion.

“There are certain things that prevent me from explaining in more detail, so I can’t say any more than that.”

I guess it’s obvious I’m not pleased about her inability to clarify, because Otonashi continues speaking after glancing at me.

“But I can tell you this. I have obtained and used a Box in the past.”

“Whaaat?!!”

“That, andmy wish is still being granted.”

So Otonashi has a Box, too?

“I’m sure you must be curious as to why I’m still looking for a Box if I already have one. That’s fine. I’ll tell you. My wish was certainly granted. But at the same time, I lost everything.”

“What do you mean, ‘everything’?”

“My family, my friends, my classmates, my relatives, my teachers, my neighbors, the people I was close to—I lost all of them thanks to my wish. Everyone who was ever involved with me is gone.”

I’m speechless.

“You mean that…literally, right? Not just some figure of speech?”

“That’s right. And I can’t just let things stay where they are. That’s what keeps me moving.”

Otonashi has lost everything. She has nothing more to fear. Perhaps that’s why she’s so focused and bold.

Exactly what “wish” did Otonashi put in the Box that would leave her in this state?

“Is there any way you can break that Box? If you break it, won’t that negate the wish?”

“Hoshino.”

A hint of warning creeps into Otonashi’s tone as she replies to my natural question.

“The Box is still granting my wish, understand? Don’t make me say any more than that.”

I get it. Of course Otonashi considered that some question like this might pop into my head.

Basically, the Box took everything from Otonashi. Butthat still wasn’t enough to make her want to negate its wish.

While I silently mull this over, Otonashi pulls herself together and resumes the conversation.

“My wish and the wish of the owner of the Rejecting Classroom are incompatible with each other. That’s just the way Boxes work. So now that I’ve come in here, I fight back to reduce its ability to get in my way. But I should stress that all I’m doing is lessening it. Put another way, not even I can completely avoid the influence of the Rejecting Classroom. I’m not sure just how much it’s affected me. If I succumb to it, I could end up trapped here myself… But I get the feeling I told you that a long time ago.”

If everything she’s saying is true, then what does the owner of the Rejecting Classroom think about Otonashi? I have a hard time believing it’s anything good.

“Anyway, it seems you’ve managed to digest all of that, so let’s get back to the matter at hand. It’s probably impossible to obtain and use the Rejecting Classroom at this point. The owner has already expended its power. That’s why all we need to worry about is putting an end to it.”

“And how can we do that?”

“We’d have to tear the Box away from the culprit. Or perhaps crush them. That’s about it. However, if we can find the one who gives out the Boxes, we may be able to convince them to do something. They’re not likely to be inside with us, though, so that isn’t a realistic option.”

The one who gives out the Boxes?

I’m about to ask more but then decide not to.

Even though I’ve met, it’s like I don’t know about them, nor do I want to.

“……Basically, we have to find the one behind all this before we can get anywhere, correct?”

“Oh? ‘Get anywhere,’ you say? Are you trying to tell me you think everything until now was completely meaningless? That it was an unproductive waste of time? You’ve got a lot of nerve.”

“N-no, I was just asking…”

“Hmph. So then I guess you mean to tell me your knowledge and quick wits could be the key to solving these riddles I couldn’t handle on my own. Don’t tell me that you said what you did without a single idea in your head?”

“…Ungh…”

I wince. I don’t have any breakthroughs.

“If you understand that, then you should also understand that there is no reason why I can’t find the owner. But there is one thing… Unlike others, the owner isn’t allowed to die within the Rejecting Classroom. My life has ended countless times in the classroom, yet I’m still here, and I haven’t lost my Box.”

“It’s different for the owner, though?”

“Yeah. Owners and their Boxes are connected. The instant the owner of this Box dies, the Rejecting Classroom will collapse. I’ve confirmed this in several similar instances, so I’m sure it’s true. The Box is destroyed at the moment of its owner’s death. This would also cause the special nature of the Rejecting Classroom to disappear, and the concept of death would be restored.”

“And that would cause the owner to die as normal…?”

“Correct.”

“That means we can say for sure that I’m not the one behind this. And of course you aren’t, either.”

“Right.”

That also means Mogi isn’t on the list of suspects. She’s died in the accident plenty of times before.

“…So what about our missing classmates? Do you think that has anything to do with death?”

“I’m not certain, but I don’t think it does. It’s probably another feature of the Rejecting Classroom, though I can’t really guess why it’s there.”

Hold on a second.

I suddenly realize something—a way to easily identify the person at the root of it all. The blood drains from my face. What am I thinking?! It’s too hideous to even consider. But, but…

Aya Otonashi could do it.

I can’t bring myself to voice the thought aloud. At the same time, I’m surprised that she hasn’t already come up with the idea herself. There’s no way she wouldn’t have thought of this. Then why hasn’t she tried it? Could it be that…?

“Hoshino.”

I jerk back to attention at the sound of my name.

“What are you thinking about? Don’t tell me you’ve come up with some means of uncovering the owner?”

My body twitches again.

“You did think of something, didn’t you…?”

“Uh, no, I—”

“It’s no use trying to fool me. Don’t forget how much time I’ve spent with you. I was on your tail for longer than I was on anyone else’s here. Not that I wanted to be.”

I know that. You don’t need Otonashi’s sharp instincts to tell that I’m trying to hide something.

“…”

That doesn’t make my idea any easier to put into words, though.

“Even someone as slow as you should know by now that I’m not the most patient of people, Hoshino.”

I’m not dealing with someone who’d buy any old lie. Once I open my mouth, she’ll get the truth out of me in the end, no matter how much I try to avoid it.

But still…

“Hoshino!!”

Otonashi grabs me by the collar. It hurts. Like, seriously. Of course it does. This girl willingly suffered repeating a day more than twenty thousand times just to get the Box.

“Say it! Tell me your idea!!”

I know I’ll regret it if I do. But can I really keep my mouth shut under these circumstances?

That’s why I voice my idea in the end.

“We need to kill all our classmates.”

It’s that simple. If dying even once eliminates someone as a possible suspect, then that’s what needs to happen. We have to kill them all. That’s the simple, reprehensible truth.

Everyone who dies in here comes back to life, though, so there’s really nothing to worry about. I could never be so cut-and-dried about it, but I’m sure Otonashi could.

She’s created tons of corpses to help her hold on to her memories, after all.

I’m still curious as to whether this hasn’t crossed her mind before, though. Why hasn’t she stumbled upon this strategy not just to retain her memory, but also as a means of narrowing down the list of suspects? Why wouldn’t she choose to implement an efficient strategy that could’ve ended this in just forty or so times?

No response.

No reaction.

I slowly raise my eyes to look at her face.

With a tight hold on my collar, she’s regarding me with an unblinking stare.

“That…” Otonashi quietly releases her grip. “That’s not a strategy at all.”

“…What?”

“That’s like human experimentation. The best way to test the effects of something on the body is to use a human subject, but the method should never even be an option,” Otonashi softly whispers, never looking away from me. “Why? The answer is simple: because it’s inhumane. The moment you do something like that, you can no longer call yourself a human being… Ah well, I am a Box, after all. Maybe that’s why. Maybe that’s why you…” There is pure, undiluted rage boiling in her eyes. “You don’t think of me as a human!”

I can understand her anger. I’d probably feel the same way if someone viewed me like that. It was a thoughtless thing to say.

All the same, I still don’t get it.

“But didn’t you kill people to make sure your memories carried over?”

“……What’re you saying?” Otonashi shoots me a sharp look, as if she finds the accusation unbearable.

“…Y-you created scenes that would burn themselves into your mind in order to hang on to your memory.”

“I’ve had enough of your insults! I thought I just explained this. I can resist the effects of the Rejecting Classroom because I’m a Box!”

She’s right. The idea that she was killing others to retain her memories was just Daiya’s hypothesis.

But even that isn’t enough for me to accept what happened.

“Why are you making that face? If you’ve got something to say, say it!”

Otonashi seizes me by the collar again.

This time I meet her angry glare with one of my own.

It isn’t like I was working myself up to do this. I didn’t even consider the implications of doing something so unlike myself as glaring back at her.

I’m in the palm of Otonashi’s hand. I know that much, and that’s exactly why I’m here talking with her like this now.

But my next words wrecked that:

“If you care so much about human lives, then why did you kill me?!”

And that’s when all words between us are lost.