The Demon Lord's Bride (BL)
Chapter 194: When everything just feels like your first time again

Chapter 194: When everything just feels like your first time again

"Should...should we...do it?"

I could hear my own voice, the slight tremble within it. My fingers were trembling too, and I could not bring myself to look into his eyes, just staring at the green pendant over his chest.

Natha did not reply immediately, and I was too embarrassed to look up. I wondered...if he knew what I was talking about? When a minute passed without Natha saying anything, I peeked into his face between my lashes, and he looked...confused? Perplexed?

"...?"

Natha just continued looking at me, unblinking. I didn’t think I could even sense his heartbeat. The heat crept more and more into my face and I couldn’t help but stuttered. "Umm...uhh...can you...can you just sense my thought?"

I bit my lips and fidgeted in place, in the end trying to shift away from him. But Natha grabbed my waist and pulled me into him, until our faces were mere inches of each other. I swallowed hard, breathing heavily. This was where I could finally hear his heartbeat, hard against my chest.

Or was it actually mine? I had no idea.

"...no," he said after looking intensely into my eyes for a long minute.

No? O-oh...he didn’t want to? Which one though? He didn’t want to do it or he didn’t want to sense my thought?

"Say it."

I blinked, and my body turned rigid in his hold. My eyes must have widened so much, and my face would have turned into a boiled crab. But Natha looked at me with determination, as if he wouldn’t budge until I did what he asked for.

"I want to hear you say it with your own mouth," he said again, softer this time, leaning close and pressing our heads together. "Please, sweetheart."

I could hear his breath become fainter with each passing second, as if he was holding his breath while waiting. I was so sure that my whole body was flushed red at this point, and when I tried to open my mouth, I ended up stuttering out of nervousness.

But I tried hard to look into his eyes.

"M-make...make love to me,"

It came out between my lips with an airy sound, almost as if I was frightened to my bone. I was trembling too, actually, so perhaps I was truly frightened. Not because I was scared, but simply because I was asking for something I had always dreaded doing before.

I understood now, that the reason I hadn’t been wanting to do it was because I wasn’t sure about his feelings. I wasn’t sure that I was the one receiving his love, and it made me reluctant to go any further. Despite doing all of those...sensual things before, my heart still didn’t want to breach that wall.

But now...now it was different.

Now I knew the one he loved was me. And it wasn’t just me in this body, which had gotten prettier. He loved me even in my previous life, when I was a dying man. He loved me even while knowing he might never get to meet me again.

He got worried, he got insecured, he got scared...just like me.

Despite being a mighty, imposing Demon Lord, he still fumbled around when it came to love and relationship. Just like me.

And it was just...relieving.

Now, when I knew I could take his heart, I felt ready to take his body too.

I didn’t know if I had enough in my eyes to convey this to him. I didn’t have enough leeway to check because I couldn’t see anything anymore once he kissed me.

And he kissed me harder than any time he kissed me before. His hands were on my waist and my head, controlling my movement. So all I could do was hold onto his shoulder and neck as he suck the air off my lungs and the saliva off my tongue.

He stopped once, to ask me with heavy breathing. "Just to make it clear; we’ll do it all the way, yeah?"

"...y-yeah," my reply came in a breathless whisper.

"I’m not going to stop, you have to know that,"

I nodded hurriedly; it was getting harder and harder to breathe with the heat climbing all over my skin, even with Natha’s cold temperature. It was itchy, and hot, and oh...I think this was what they called impatience.

"I know," I gripped his coat, practically climbing on his lap now. "I know."

I thought I heard a sound of a soft growl coming out of him, but I couldn’t be too sure, because my vision was suddenly darkened by the black feather. The next thing I knew, my back was already touching the soft mattress.

Did he just... teleport us to the bedroom? Despite just teleporting a long distance with two people an hour earlier?

I was blinking in a daze and in awe while Natha pulled away from me. My arms fell to the side of my head as I watched him close his eyes and take a deep breath. When he opened them again, the silver eyes were gleaming and staring hard at me, and I could see the way he tried to control himself.

The first thing he did after that was raising his finger, which was followed by a faint clicking sound from the door. The balcony door was next, and then the window. Slowly, the room was getting dimmer, only illuminated by the flame from the fireplace. But it was enough for me to see that his eyes had never left me all the while.

Between the cracking sound of the burnt coal, I could hear my own heartbeat and heavy breathing. He leaned down, ever so slightly, just enough so the peeking sunlight and the fire could shine on his face better.

And oh...how could he look this beautiful? All of those traces of exhaustion on his face were the love and dedication he had for me, and it was more beautiful than anything else. I reached out to touch his face, stroking his cheek and jaw, and he leaned lower to let me do it easier.

None of us were saying anything, just looking at each other’s faces, into each other’s eyes. Just making sure that we were both the people we had fallen in love with in the past, and basked in the blessing that we could find each other again in this life, in this world.

Was it fate? Was it divine intervention? Was it a coincidence?

At that moment, we couldn’t care less.

"Natha," I whispered his name, tracing the pattern on his neck and pulling him closer until the mattress dipped lower by his weight. "Make love to me."

I said it better now, firmer, surer. I was still nervous, still a little bit frightened--but I was also sure I wanted to do this. I wanted to connect myself to him more than ever.

I was one now, whole, and I wanted to make us one too.

His answer came in a sweet, sweet kiss. Despite his eyes looking as if he wanted to pounce on me, he kissed me so softly, gently, touching my lips with tenderness as if they were fragile. And when he was done with what seemed like too short of a time, he asked me again.

"You’re really, really sure?"

I nodded, licking my glistening lips in a mix of nervousness and excitement. "I’m sure,"

"But you’ll tell me if it’s too much, yeah?"

He stroked my cheek, voice as soft and sweet as his kiss earlier. "But you said you aren’t going to stop," I responded in confusion, pursing my lips because I started to grow impatient.

"I’m not going to stop," his lips curled into a smirk that got my heart skip a beat. "But I’ll try to be gentler."

It seemed to imply that he was going to get rough initially--which supposedly made me frightened, but I swallowed hard for the tingling feeling in my abdomen instead.

"Okay?" he asked again, still with a soothing voice.

"Okay," I nodded again, looking straight into his eyes so he would know I meant it.

I thought, from how long I put this off, that Natha would immediately get into it. I could even see it in his eyes, the unmasked desire that he held with a clenching jaw. I could hear the fast beating of his heart.

And yet, he moved so gently, so slowly, that it was me who grew impatient.

He smiled and kissed me, again soft and gentle, while his hands move to undress me slowly. As I savored his sweet kiss, I had this feeling that he might do this so he wouldn’t hurt me. It was his effort in restraint and self-control, it seemed.

I tried to do the same for him, but it was hard to undo traveling clothes without seeing them, so all I managed to do was fumble with the buttons and cords. The moment he finished stripping my outer clothes, I only managed to unbutton his coat.

So I gave up, and felt his chuckle against my lips. He parted our lips and I gasped as he pulled me up to straddle his lap. Finally, I could see him clearly, and with his hands supporting my waist, I proceeded to take his clothes off in earnest.

It was quite embarrassing looking at his face while doing this, so I just looked at his body instead, at the textured skin that got exposed more and more. I knew I did this a few times before, but knowing that we would go all the way made the whole experience feel more intense. I didn’t even realize my breath had gotten heavier the more clothes I shed off him.

"Sweetheart," he whispered as I touched his cold skin. "Kiss me,"

I took a deep breath before looking up and leaning forward, capturing his smiling lips. I could no longer touch his skin because he started to strip me off completely. He pulled me up so he could take me off my pants, and I shuddered a little bit after my body was completely bare.

And then, my back touched the mattress again, bare for his eyes to see, to feast upon.

And that was exactly what he was doing.

For a few moments, he just stared at me, unblinking. Looking at my face, my neck, my chest, and lower and lower, and I instinctively pulled my legs tight in embarrassment. Without blinking, he spread them open until I gasped.

"Let me see,"

His voice was subdued, as if it had a hidden growl behind. Once again, it wasn’t his first time looking at my genitals, but for some reason, both of us were acting like we did everything for the first time.

And then, he suddenly lowered his head and planted a kiss on my tight, prompting me to shriek slightly. Still with his lips against my skin, he looked straight at me.

"Thank you," he said, "for letting me make love to you."

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