Put Away Your Divine Techniques Now!
Chapter 58 - 38 [The Exploding Hu Licking Dog]

Chapter 58: Chapter 38 [The Exploding Hu Licking Dog]

Chapter Thirty-eight [Hu Licking Dog Explodes]

The fence wall toward the mountain forest had already been bitten open, with several of those originally pinky-width iron bars having been bitten through.

A figure as large as a millstone lay on the grass in the courtyard!

The old turtle was panting heavily, full of anger!

That despicable scoundrel! This old turtle has journeyed for many days and finally made it here!

I’m going to find out which heartless wretch is recklessly casting spells here, stealing the Primordial Qi from my mountain, and ruining my cultivation plan!!

If I don’t teach you a harsh lesson, I won’t be able to vent the anger of this old turtle after such a long and hard journey!

Suddenly, the door of the house opened, and a figure rushed in like a gust of wind.

"Hmph, finally out!" The old turtle’s heart leapt with joy, and it shouted angrily, "You despicable scoundrel!"

The person had already arrived in front of it like a gust of wind!

The old turtle was immediately terrified. After all, as a spirit beast that had attained the Dao, it naturally possessed the technique of Qi observation in its eyes and could sense that the person in front of it had Primordial Qi waves surging like the ocean, boundless and overwhelming...

Under such an imposing force, the old turtle felt its breath catch, and before it could speak, it heard a thin voice.

"You are the despicable scoundrel!"

Gu Girl was not having it! Her small face frosty, she kicked out with one foot!

Buzz!

The old turtle felt a buzzing in its ears, then a tremendous force hit it. With a scream, its millstone-sized body was directly lifted and sent flying, rolling seven or eight times in the air... finally crashing into several blue stones of the Spirit Gathering Array at the edge of the courtyard.

The blue stones instantly shattered, and the old turtle’s millstone-sized body got stuck between them!

The old turtle felt that with this blow, its internal organs had shifted, its head was dizzy, and its Spiritual Qi was scattered and in disarray, its Dantian Spiritual Qi almost dissipating entirely!

It nearly lost its breath on the spot.

Just as it was about to struggle, the figure had already jumped in front of it, a foot in white sneakers stepping on its shell.

The old turtle felt like Mount Tai was pressing on it and let out a miserable scream, its limbs going soft and it could no longer move.

Gu Girl’s eyes were like electricity as she stared at it, but the voice she emitted was a sweet and soft one: "Want to try cursing again?"

The old turtle blinked its eyelids, staring fixedly at the girl in front of it, then suddenly, it almost rolled its eyes, scared out of its wits!

[Is, is she in the Celestial Human Realm?]

At that moment, all its hardness vanished, and it retracted its limbs and head into its shell, shouting with all its might: "Immortal, spare my life!!"

Gu Girl snorted coldly, finally retracting the foot that was about to kick out again.

In the turtle shell, the old turtle dared not move, trembling and using all its energy, shouting, "Immortal above! This little turtle has eyes but failed to see, offending the Immortal. Please, for the sake of my shallow Tao practice and hard cultivation, spare me this once!"

After speaking, both its forelimbs extended from the shell and clasped together in a desperate plea.

Gu Girl’s face remained stern: "Are you the House Guardian Spirit Beast here?"

"Hmm?"

Upon hearing this, the old turtle quickly ran through several thoughts in its mind and hurriedly shouted, "No, no! I, I am a loose cultivator from the mountain."

Gu Girl exclaimed: "Not a House Guardian Spirit Beast? Then why did you curse at me just now?"

"I, I, I... I was here to see the owner of this place, um..." The old turtle spoke, but its head retracted into the shell, blinking and peeking out.

How am I supposed to say this?

Say I came to cause trouble? What if this Celestial Being is a friend of the owner here, and I end up getting beaten up again?

But if I don’t tell the truth... should I say... I am a friend of the owner here?

Yes!

"I, I am the neighbor of the owner here. Usually, I cultivate in the mountain and have a very good relationship with the owner here. We frequently interact, we are practically family..."

Upon hearing this, Gu Girl’s face turned dark: "A friend of the Chen Family? A very good relationship, frequent interactions? Associating with the shameless Chen Family, you are not a good thing either!"

Crack!

Another stomp, pushing the old turtle directly into the soil.

The old turtle’s eyes went black, its spiritual energy scattered again, almost spitting out a mouthful of blood.

Terrified but quick-witted, it thought furiously.

She said the owner here is shameless... so she’s not a friend, she’s an enemy of this family?

Yes, definitely an enemy!!

Figuring this out, the old turtle quickly shouted: "No no! I misspoke earlier! I am not a friend of this family!

I, I am actually their creditor! This family’s head is extremely shameless, and I, I came to collect a debt!"

Originally, it thought after saying this, the Immortal would turn anger into joy.

Unexpectedly, Gu Girl’s face darkened again. The Chen Family, though shameless, was also her future in-laws!

"How bold! No matter how bad the Chen Family is, only I can scold them. With your insignificant Tao practice, you dare to scold them? Asking for a beating!"

After finishing, another stomp!

The old turtle cried out in pain, its entire body buried further into the soil, struggling to breathe.

Secretly cursing in its heart.

What the heck!!!

Praising doesn’t work? Scolding doesn’t work either?

Is being an Immortal that great!!!

Bullying!!!

·

After three consecutive kicks, the old turtle’s body was buried about half a meter into the ground. It could barely breathe, almost passing out.

Gu Girl finally retracted her foot, stepped back two steps, and coldly glanced at it: "Don’t play dead. You should be at the Transformation Realm. My three kicks were only a punishment and can’t kill you. Come out and respond."

The old turtle whimpered as it climbed out of the pit, its breath weak, whimpering.

Gu Girl glanced at it, frowning: "I don’t like seeing you in this turtle form. Turn into human form to talk to me."

"Immortal, you don’t know, I am undergoing my once-in-a-hundred-year Celestial Dao Minor Tribulation and can’t use spells for a year to avoid drawing the tribulation. I..."

Gu Girl glanced coldly at it: "I will probably be living here for a long time, and I lack a servant to do rough work. Since you are here, you will do. Your turtle form is too slow. If I need you to do something, will you crawl like this? Transform quickly!

As for your Demon Cultivator’s Celestial Dao Minor Tribulation, with me around, what are you afraid of?"

What?

I, am I being recruited just like that?

The old turtle froze, then felt a hint of joy in its heart!

I... am being recruited by a Celestial Human Realm person under their command?!

The old turtle promptly extended its head, speaking with joy: "Thank you, Immortal, for granting me this opportunity!!"

Finishing, it took a deep breath toward the forest, large decaying leaves flew and circled around its body. With a flash of golden light, the old turtle transformed into human shape, and the leaves transformed into clothes on its body.

Standing in front of Gu Girl now was a short and thin old man, who then knelt in front of Gu Girl with a thud.

"Hmm, looks much better now." Gu Girl glanced at him, and then spoke faintly, "Tell me, the Interface between the two worlds is shielded by an array. How did you manage to sneak in with your meager Tao practice?"

"Uh?"

The old turtle was stunned, shaking its head: "I grew up here... passed down by my ancestors for countless generations. I don’t know how many years it has been."

Gu Girl nodded: "So you are the descendants of those who escaped the realm back in the day."

Then, the old turtle confessed in detail how it hibernated in the mountain lake, how the mountain’s Primordial Qi was sucked away...

Gu Girl listened quietly, glancing at the blue stones of the Spirit Gathering Array in the courtyard, nodding: "Hmm, not bad. Her family actually has a ready-made Spirit Gathering Array; my future days will be comfortable."

Then she told the old turtle: "You broke the array just now, so you are responsible for fixing it."

The old turtle looked embarrassed: "I... I don’t know how."

It quickly added: "In this world, people do not practice spells. The inheritance of spells is very rare. I just relied on some inherited talent to fumble and cultivate in the mountains, and I don’t know much else."

Gu Girl pondered for a moment: "Can you cook?"

"I cannot."

"Can you use the Dust-removal Skill? For cleaning the house, washing clothes, that sort of thing."

"I cannot..."

"Do you know how to use household appliances? How about using a phone or a computer to go online?"

"I do not..."

Gu Girl frowned, thinking, glanced at the swimming pool in the courtyard: "You can’t do anything? Then fill that pool with water and stay there.

Since you can’t do anything useful, you can at least be a pet."

The old turtle: "..."

·

Unknown how long had passed, when Chen Yan slowly woke up, he felt dizzy and parched.

He barely turned over and felt his body weak.

He was alarmed—could it be that the bad luck hadn’t been eliminated and had found him again?

Lying in bed, he quickly made some calculations.

Hmm? Today’s fortune is good.

He reached under the pillow for his phone to check the time and suddenly sat up straight in bed!

It was January 1, 2025, at 7:26 in the morning.

"Crap!"

Chen Yan remembered that when he lay down in this hotel, it was the early hours of December 31.

Unknowingly, he had missed crossing into the New Year.

He had slept for over twenty hours straight?! No wonder he felt dizzy and parched.

Starving!

He barely managed to get up, feeling weak, having eaten seven days of instant noodles. The last meal he had before sleeping was also instant noodles, and he really didn’t want to touch that stuff again.

Picking up his phone, he left the room and went downstairs, leaving the hotel to find a breakfast place in the town. He bought some local pork potstickers and a bowl of spicy soup, enjoying the hot meal.

On a cold winter morning, the biting wind cut like a knife, but having a hot meal made Chen Yan feel much better.

He checked his WeChat messages from the past few days.

Lu Sisi had sent several messages.

During Christmas, she sent a message, which he didn’t reply to—he was undergoing a seven-day tribulation at that time.

She sent another on New Year’s Eve, but he was sleeping and didn’t reply again.

The last message was a cautious question from Lu Sisi.

"Chen Yan, do you dislike me bothering you?"

Chen Yan stared at this message for a few seconds, almost imagining her personality, cautiously sending this, feeling worried and insecure.

Chen Yan thought for a moment and replied: "I was in seclusion practicing for a few days, so I didn’t check my phone."

·

Returning to the B&B, he asked the owner to help him find a known taxi driver and negotiated the fare for a long-distance ride back to Jinling Prefecture.

While waiting in his room for the driver, suddenly his phone rang, and Chen Yan saw the caller...

It was Hu Shangke, the Hu Licking Dog.

Uh... Feeling a bit guilty, Chen Yan answered the call.

Sure enough, as soon as the call connected, the angry roar of Hu Licking Dog came through.

"Chen Yan!! What did you do to that rental house? How did it collapse!

You screwed me over badly, do you know that!"

Chen Yan sighed: "Lao Hu, calm down first."

"How can I not be anxious?! Such a big house collapsed!!"

·

[The funniest thing today is that I feel embarrassed to ask for monthly tickets for this book, but I saw a big reader in the background who voted 8 tickets for "Hunter Country" in one go... I am so tired.]

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