Livestreaming: I am retarded, but selected to join the analoghorror game?!
Chapter 413 - 304 Strolling on the Path of Life.

Chapter 413: Chapter 304 Strolling on the Path of Life.

At the very beginning, Xiao Yi suddenly realized he hadn’t seen Eve for a very long time.

He initially thought that the time between their meetings was just extended once more, and although he felt somewhat hollow inside, he did not pay too much attention to it.

Then, as time went on, Xiao Yi became increasingly aware that his initial thoughts were merely self-consolation.

That sister... had truly disappeared forever.

By the time Xiao Yi realized this, he didn’t cry or lose his soul; he just stood there motionlessly, stunned.

The emotions that surged inside him were too many, leaving him momentarily unsure which to express, and he could no longer distinguish which emotion was the most important.

She had left him, and once again, he was alone.

It wasn’t the romantic open ending of stories but the stark and clear, terrifying reality.

At that time, amidst his confusion, Xiao Yi learned an ability that everyone must acquire as they grow, an essential skill for survival.

That was... avoidance.

However, no one taught Xiao Yi how to avoid; he could only adopt the worst method of escape.

At that time, Xiao Yi desperately wished he could forget it all.

Forget his loneliness, so that being alone wouldn’t be so frightening.

But memory isn’t something that can be easily controlled by the conscious mind; moreover, those clear-headed thoughts that incessantly emerged when he was alone caused Xiao Yi indescribable pain.

He could only keep cursing his brain, wondering why it wouldn’t follow his will, why it always had to be contrary.

As a result, Xiao Yi even began to hate his ability to think, wishing he could slice out his own brain so he wouldn’t have to think about those things.

But he couldn’t.

And so, Xiao Yi began to numb himself with alcohol.

"...Yes, even temporary forgetfulness would be good," he told himself, then without hesitation, poured alcohol into his mouth.

Regardless of how harsh it was, causing tears to flow uncontrollably, it didn’t matter.

There was no need to taste, the flavor of alcohol was really just so-so in the end; what mattered was the effect of the alcohol.

In a daze, between being half awake and half drunk, Xiao Yi not only forgot his loneliness but even felt something... a feeling named happiness.

But that happiness was always fleeting, followed by immense pain.

"Gruh uhh uhh uhh uhh uhh uhh!!!"

One night, Xiao Yi couldn’t remember what he had been doing, and he didn’t want to remember.

The moment his consciousness began to awaken, he started vomiting uncontrollably.

A sour and astringent viscous substance poured out of his mouth, and it didn’t stop for a long time.

Moreover, the vomit was tinged with a vivid red.

"Ugh..." Xiao Yi wiped his mouth and just glanced indifferently, then said as if it didn’t concern him, "No wonder this time it feels like not just bile but my stomach wants to come up too. Looks like it’s a gastric hemorrhage."

Xiao Yi did not care at all about this; he behaved as if he was a passerby unconcerned with his own affairs.

Then, he collapsed straight onto the ground, rubbing his head, his face contorted in pain.

"It hurts... as if someone has punctured my temples with a screwdriver."

The pain from the hangover constantly jabbed at Xiao Yi’s nerves.

"Is it necessary to experience such pain just to momentarily forget, to taste a happiness that’s out of reach? Living... really is pointless."

Xiao Yi sighed deeply, and as his consciousness gradually cleared, the things he didn’t want to think about once again flooded his mind.

"...Let me sleep, no, never mind, realizing that I’ll eventually die while in a half-asleep state would be even more painful than usual."

Xiao Yi tried to get up, but after strenuously trying, he still couldn’t, and the back of his head hit the hard ground again.

"..."

Then, as Xiao Yi let out a resigned sigh, he suddenly felt his head was gently cradled by a tender force.

Next, the back of his head felt something soft and warm.

At the same time, that gentle, familiar caress flowed through Xiao Yi’s hair.

"...!"

Xiao Yi’s eyes opened in shock, and then, under the cool, white moonlight, he saw that familiar face once more.

"I’m sorry..." she said: "For letting you suffer like this..."

She smiled at Xiao Yi, her smile saturated with bitterness, helplessness, and guilt, but she still smiled, showing Xiao Yi that familiar smile from his memory.

Xiao Yi thought he was dreaming; his consciousness was still hazy, and it wouldn’t be strange for him to dream.

But even if it was a dream, he saw her again.

So Xiao Yi didn’t want to continue with regret, even if it was just a dream, he wanted to tell her, to express his true feelings, the words he regretted not having said.

"No, it’s not your fault," he said: "I chose to do this myself."

"Chose it yourself?"

"Yes." Xiao Yi slowly explained: "I’ve known for a long time that alcohol would bring me such pain, and I’ve experienced it more than once, but even so, I still chose to do it."