Dungeon? This Tree? Why Don't You Join Me for Lunch? (Dungeon Core)
Chapter 88: A Mushroom to Die For!

Chapter 88: Chapter 88: A Mushroom to Die For!

Now, I needed to put some of them healing mushrooms in this soup. There was only one thing to do if I had to be honest.

Mushroom-Onion Soup! Healing, hydrating, making one think of home!

But first thing first, I needed to make sure that everything was nice and ordered! First, I needed the butter.

Oh, how I had missed that lovely smell, for Desmond complained even when I just had a butter stick there, on the counter, where it was its holy temple!

I shook my head.

I loved my men, but I loved cooking more. And I wasn’t even ashamed to admit it!

Seeing as I was cooking for two, but one of them was Wrath, I really needed to make a lot of soup.

The recipe flashed before my eyes. Normally, I was eyeballing it, but this time, I needed to recalculate what I needed. For the off chance that I was cooking for three, and the smell of the soup won Lamia over!

Which was something I hoped for.

Next, I got all the spices: salt and pepper! Cut up chilis, straight from Nick’s farm!

Garlic, just three cloves. I wasn’t going to make it too garlicky.

Not this time.

The ladies, as I had found out during the years, didn’t like for their breath to smell of garlic.

The good thing about this soup is that one could add stuff to taste! Now, there was no garlic in the recipe, but I loved my garlic! It was the stuff of legends!

What was the world without garlic, a great philosopher, read my dear old Methuselah, had asked me once.

And I was like: tasteless!

I still stand by the words I had uttered back then, at the ass crack of the dawn of time, when I was just learning to cook and used garlic to save every meal.

Or, better said, back when I was ten!

The recipe called for rice and bay leaves. I took just a tiny bit.

The next thing which I found on the counter was a chicken leg. The broth was needed, but if I sent Wrath soup without meat, he was probably going to throw it in the still waters, which got Lamia’s dungeon its name.

I couldn’t risk the food!

So, I placed the chicken leg inside of a cast-iron pot and then let it boil. It was going to make enough broth for the soup and for some pasta sauce afterward!

Because it is good to eat pasta late at night. It might even make Wrath calmer! Drusilla might even fall in love with him because of that!

And before I knew it, I would have one husband less!

I was an evil, manipulating, matchmaker and I knew it!

I washed the healing mushrooms, which were still at 20% healing, and then stared at them for a while.

What if... I improved it with the skill which could turn any rotten food item into something edible?

What if that was the real purpose of that skill?

I touched one of the mushrooms with my knife, applying just the tiniest pressure.

There! Now it was wounded... so to speak.

This was the moment of truth! The moment I was holding my breath over!

Because, as much as I told myself that I didn’t care about Wrath, the thing was, he was still in a dungeon, which was both hot and cold in places, with waters so toxic, one could make a poisonous potion by just scooping some of the water and putting it in a flask!

A potion which was going to fetch tons on the Black Market!

Hm...

I shook my head.

No, if I tried to use Wrath to harvest the still waters in the Dungeon of Still Waters, he was going to divorce me.

Via Two-Handed Axe to the Head...

The mushroom was glowing! I blinked. It slowly turned golden!

Did that mean that I could use mushrooms to produce fake gold, I asked myself.

I brought the knife down on the golden mushroom!

It glowed a yellow so bright, that I had to close my eyes. By the time it stopped glowing, I felt... fine.

Better than fine!

I was 5,000 years old, and as an old man, I had certain bones which could predict the weather. I knew for a fact, or at least I felt five minutes ago, that it was going to rain.

Not just rain, but rain so much and so long, that if the tourists didn’t run off to their nine to five soon, they were probably going to end up composted.

Another storm... with the same mana signature!

I doubted that the Lich King was back. No! I thought that mother nature had finally taken him back into her embrace, and was now spitting out his poison, because it could not stomach it.

Ah! The imagination of a nymph!

But...

Now the tension in my bones was gone! And the slight taste in the air, which hinted at a downpour, was also gone!

I didn’t know it at the time, but as I began to turn my healing mushrooms into super food, I made myself the enemy of the Lich King Alexios, who was wearing the King Solas of Solaria’ body like a suit.

He’d try to start a storm. To drown Solaria under a downpour so heavy, not even the mountains were going to be left standing.

I’d... chop another golden, glowing, mushroom!

I had Wrath to feed; the poor Lich was recovering from being dead.

He didn’t have a chance!

By the time I placed the butter in the cast-iron pot, letting it melt, as I did the final preparations on the onions and garlic, I had reduced the Lich King Alexios to a crying mess.

And the lady Fin to a giggling mess.

But that wasn’t important to me! Because I was just beginning to cook the soup!

And may Mother Nature have mercy on the poor Lich King. For the mushrooms’ scent... also had a cleansing effect!

That poor sucker was going to die.

And I was going to kill him by being obvious, addicted to cooking, drake, me.

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