Dungeon? This Tree? Why Don't You Join Me for Lunch? (Dungeon Core)
Chapter 47: Now that you’re fed…

Chapter 47: Chapter 47: Now that you’re fed...

There were many things I didn’t know about goblins. One of them was that they never, ever, upheld their word.

All of the goblins expected that I’d follow all of my clothes in the pot.

But the chief... oh, he was licking the bowls and waving them as soon as there were no traces of the food left.

Grilled Cheese Sandwich grease was apparently something he wanted to die for.

I had no idea at that time, but this was a goblin who was going to rewrite history. Goblin history, that is.

"We won’t eat him," he pointed at me, then he waved his bowl at me. Why he started to insist that I placed his sandwiches in bowls was beyond me, but, hey, he wasn’t insisting that I finish the soup the goblins started cooking... with me in it.

"No!" The goblins roared as one. "We eat!"

I blinked. The smell of my unwashed socks coming from the soup cauldron made me cringe.

And yet, I had an idea!

"How about we all eat a bit of soup, and then we can talk again?" It was a bold move. A move I hadn’t prepared enough grilled cheese sandwiches for.

I was still at level one.

But I had Edda!

"You know, cheating is boring," she had no mercy in her black heart. But that was ok. I was ready to beg!

"Ok, how about this: I will be able to produce something that comes from the union of a goblin and a nymph soon... if you know what I mean?"

Now, the chief goblin looked about as handsome as a rotting potato, but I didn’t do it with Aron and Nate before I got the schemas.

Yeah, I knew by that point what had happened. That was a mana infusion. I just needed for the one I was infusing with mana to get enough in their system.

So, I could steal their biological imprint!

"That would be an ogre," I didn’t understand the logic behind that one. It should be a hobgoblin.

But, hey, ogres were bigger, faster, stronger...

"Dumber," Edda added the last one.

"The cheese will sort them out," I told her, as I made the final step towards something I was going to end up in if Edda didn’t help.

"You have only 100 mana points left," she told me, and I nodded. "I can give you something, but it will be a 50-50 chance."

I blinked.

"The World Dungeon doesn’t like you," which was to be expected. Brandon and Pan were waging war against it.

To save Lexus the Nymph from ever being bound again. To free the World Tree.

"Then do it!" I was ready to run! But first I wanted to see what Edda had to offer.

"Huh?" Edda was a tar-hearted daughter of a...

The goblin chief was looking at the pair of dice in his hand. I looked at the direction from where I hoped I had come from.

Ok, even without boots I should still be able to outrun some goblins...

The goblin chief’s eyes met mine, he winked and threw the dice.

My heart went straight up my throat as the dice began to twirl in the air.

They were falling. A goblin was tugging at my arm, a knife in his hand.

Ready to cut me up alive. Throw me in as a bloody mess into something that used my dirty socks as a broth base.

The goblin chief caught the dice, holding up a hand.

"Fate will decide!" He yelled, as he began to glow.

"Aron!" I yelled because the knife was getting closer and closer to my naked skin. I was just in my underwear, darn it!

The goblin chief opened his hand. He slammed the dice on the ground.

"10!" The goblin, which was about to filet me stopped, looking at the dice with narrowed eyes. "And 10!"

"Perfect Fortuna," the goblin threw the knife at a cutting board. It stuck in there, waving back and forth.

I fell on the ground. Dead to the world.

0000

When I woke, there was a muscular and handsome man next to me who... still looked like a goblin.

"You got the schema, by the way," Edda told me. I saw the picture of the ogres, who looked strangely human. "Perfect Fortuna... darn, you married a gambler who knows how to cheat! This is the last time I throw a die at him!"

"I want more food!" My new husband seemed not to care about much else, but I was glad.

I sprang to my feet, took some bread, noticed that I was wearing my clothes once more, which were warm and dry, but smelling of soup and socks, and I began to grill sandwiches again.

The goblins ate the soup, which might have been my final meal as well.

Had the chief not cheated.

"So," I asked, as the fourth sandwich went the way of the dodo. "Why did you save me?"

It was a question I needed to ask. After all, if we were married now, I needed something to give as an excuse to Aron and Nate for, well, cheating.

"You cook well," was my only answer, before he started to wave his bowl at me like the caveman he was.

I weighed the pros and cons of teaching him how to make his own sandwiches. My dear new husband bared his teeth at me. Apparently, I was too slow.

Soon his bowl had another sandwich in it.

But I had a problem.

The goblin chief was a bottomless pit! I needed to make him something that would finally be enough!

I looked around. Oh, if I could only get my hands on a clay pot and an oven...

I blinked as I saw a wonder in a corner. So, as if it were summoned. The oven was old, and broken up, but it was already lit!

And the clay pot, which was resting a bit far off so that it wouldn’t end up breaking from the heat, looked big enough for the goblin chief!

"Honey, do you have meat?" I asked him.

He took out a knife; I prepared to run.

But instead of him throwing the knife at me, he threw it at the goblin, who nearly killed me and dumped me in the soup.

"Now I do!"

My hair was going to turn white before the end of the day! I needed a divorce!

And fast!

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