Contract Marriage starring Love and Revenge
Chapter 66. I’ll make them pay

Chapter 66: 66. I’ll make them pay

In a tub with the water filled to the brim, to the point where it’s overflowing, I’m sitting with my knees folded up, my hands wrapped around them and my head resting on them. I’ve been like this since Alan and I returned home. I’m guessing it’s been almost an hour now.

Duke had taken the twins to his parents house, Alan said Duke said he wanted to focus his entire attention on me for now, and that’s why he had taken the twins to his parents.

He even asked Gio to take a leave for the time being. So right now, it’s just me and Alan in the whole house until Duke arrives.

I wonder when he will come.

When I remember my encounter with Rowan today, I just begin to rage all over. I was married to that man for five years! Five long years and I didn’t see the kind of person he was.

I refused to see.

I dedicated my heart to that man for five years and all I got in return was a surgical knife straight to my stomach and gloved hands taking out my uterus.

I’ve been in this tub now, thinking the same thing over and over again.

If doing the hysterectomy was Alicia’s plan, what was her reason? What was the reason she took away something I so much longed for? She had to have a good reason for doing something so inhuman.

But when I think of it... Did Alicia ever have a good reason for hurting me?

No.

She always just did it because she wanted to. Nothing more.

And this time was probably the same.

The more I think about it, the more painful it gets. I will never be able to have my own children.

I was always scared of pregnancy. I had seen a lot of pregnant women, I’d seen and heard a lot of people talk about the pains of labor, of child bearing.

To be honest, I was scared of it, but still, no matter how scared I was, I still wanted to experience that feeling of having a tiny little figure grow inside me, little by little for nine months. I wanted to experience the joy of holding a new born baby, my own flesh and blood whom I brought to life, in my hand while my husband stands by my bedside whispering words of praise and adoration to me.

I wanted to learn what it was like to breastfeed a little human being. To be the direct and only source of the babies feeding for the months that child would need me.

I had dreams, sweet dreams of watching my baby learn how to sit straight, then crawl and I had imagined how I would go crazy screaming "The baby took his/her first step!"

I had envisioned arguing with my husband that our baby was going to call mama first. And time and time again, I had acted out how I would sulk and pout for days if the baby called Dada first instead of mama.

Oh how I had planned everything in my head only to be shattered like this.

"Pagne?" I instantly lift my head from my knees as I hear his voice. "Payne are you in there?" He knocks on the door and my entire body immediately wants to run out there and just hold onto him but as I stir in the water to go to him a thought suddenly hits me...

’What if Duke wants more children in the future?’ It’s like a hammer hits my chest and shatters the light bulb that turned on inside me the moment I heard his voice. Slowly I curl back up in the tub.

"Pagne! Pagne I know you’re in there,"

We decided to try and make this a real marriage but I am no longer complete, I can not give him children. I know he already has the twins, but what if he planned on having more babies in the future? And now that I can no longer have children what will happen?

Is there still a future with me next to Duke?

"Pagne! Pagne if you don’t answer me now I swear I’m coming in there!"

I’m curling, and curling and I’m slipping lower into the water as I think to myself...

"Pagne!"

I am an empty vessel now. I’m a waste, I can’t be of any use to him.

"Fuck it! Pagne!"

He won’t be gaining anything from me. I wish I could have Duke’s baby, but now I can no longer do that... I have been made into a useless waste of space and—

"The hell Pagne!!" I drag in air as I’m pulled out of the water that I had sunk into. "What the hell do you think you’re doing?!" I look up at the face of the man whose hands are holding me firmly "My God, you are white as sheet!" and I can’t help but burst into tears.

I’m useless now, "No, let me go!" I don’t know why I’m suddenly screaming and trying to get out of his hold when in truth all I want is for him to keep holding me.

"Pagne! Pagne calm down!!" He’s yelling, his strong hands are trying to hold me steady but maybe because I’m naked and slippery he can’t seem to hold on to me as I wriggle and try to push him away with every bit of strength I have.

"Goddammit Champagne! You’ll hurt yourself!" He yells but I don’t want to hear anything he’s saying.

I can’t stand that I let myself be so gullible. I can’t stand the fact that I let myself get deceived into doing something like that. I feel so much anger at myself for falling victim to such schemes.

"Champagne!" I flinch in shock as a loud smacking sound echoes throughout the bathroom, forcing me to stay put as I regain my senses and I’m staring into the eyes of the man before me.

Now I’m starting to feel the hotness on my left cheek where his palm had landed, and for a moment, I can see clearly until tears begin to well up in my eyes.

I don’t even know what I want to cry about right now. The factory reset slap I just received or my messed up situation? I don’t know but as soon as the tears begin to trail down my cheek, I begin to wail loudly.

"Come here," He pulls me into a hug while I’m still in the water. "I’m sorry." He says while holding me tightly in his arms, stroking my wet head. "I’m sorry for hitting you. I just didn’t want you to hurt yourself." I know, I know this and it makes me cry even more.

The longer he holds me the clearer it becomes that I really have nothing to offer him now. But I can’t help but still want to be with this man. I know it’s selfish of me considering I have nothing to offer him, but... I still want to be with Duke Grand.

"I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you woke up in the hospital." He says and I bawl even louder. I want to hold him but I’ve suddenly lost strength in my arms. I can’t feel them, I can’t even move them from the water.

So I just sit still and let him hug me while I cry in his arms.

"They took everything away from me, Duke. Everything!" I cry.

"I know. I know, I’m sorry."

"They took away my_my_ my—" Oh God help me, I can’t even bring myself to say the words in front of him. It hurts. It hurts so much I don’t think I can ever heal from this pain.

"I was so stupid, Duke."

"No, no, Shush. That’s not true."

"I have never met anyone as gullible as I."

"Stop it Pagne. You don’t have to say those things. I know you’re hurting enough, so just cry." He kisses the side of my face and hugs me closer. At this point there’s no difference between him who’s kneeling outside the tub and me who’s sitting inside it. Wearing both soaking wet.

"Just cry. You don’t have to say anything." He says.

"Oh God." I exclaim in tears. "I will make them pay! I swear it." I cry as I finally find the strength in my hands to hold onto him. At this point I’ve long forgotten my naked state.

"He— they made me barren, Duke. They made me empty." I cry.

"I swear I will make them pay with everything I have. I will use my very own blood to sign the documents that will end them if I must!"

"No my love." He breathes into my ear. Slowly, his hand pushes me gently away from his body and he holds onto both sides of my face, caressing my wet cheek, wiping my tears away. "Not with your blood." He says as I sniffle, "But with theirs."

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