Carnivals: Claimed By The Deranged Alpha Prince [BL]
Chapter 114: Worse Than Heartbreak

Chapter 114: Worse Than Heartbreak

Jules’ pov

I couldn’t stop my tears even if I tried to.

After he had asked me to go pack my things, I had shoved past the tentative feelings inside of me and tried to close the distance between us, but he suddenly disappeared into thin me, leaving me all alone in the kitchen.

I let out a startled gasp at first, which morphed into a sob in the next moment.

After that, the tears began to cascade in waves.

Since I couldn’t hold myself up anymore, I let myself slide to the ground as the tears poured out of me, my entire body shook from the force of it and my heart which had completely shattered inside of me felt like it had it was breaking into smaller pieces all over again when I tried to replay what just went down between us.

It almost felt like it didn’t happen, like I was just seeing things, like I had just made the entire thing up in my head. It had happened way to fast.

On remembering the last thing he said before disappearing from here, I broke into another round of tears.

He had asked me to go pack my things.

But I couldn’t do that, because I didn’t want to leave, I didn’t want to room with anyone that wasn’t him. It would hand been comical to me if I wasn’t completely falling apart right now.

I couldn’t believe that I was currently crying because he wanted to get me assigned to room with someone else, when I had literally broken down from fright the day he picked me out of everyone else to be his roommate.

The thought of him rooming with someone that wasn’t me left a horrible bitter feeling in my chest, I didn’t even want to think about it because it was gonna make me start screaming. the thought of him asking his new roommate to sleep in his bed and in his srms made so much pain grip my chest thzt I got consumed with the urge to vomit.

I tried to control my tears but it was pointless because it refused to stop coming. It just kept pouring and pouring, wrecking my entire inside.

"You’ve ruined this one gift that this entire fucked up situation gave you." I silently reminded myself as a new wave of tears rushed through my veins.

"You’ve ruined it with your own hands." I reminded myself, even though it felt like those realizations and acknowledgments were physically hurting me.that was the only thing I deserved right now, to hurt myself because when I could have listened to my heart, I kept second guessing everything.

I couldn’t even bring myself to feel angry at him for his decision. All he had done was care for me and protect him. It’s a slap to his face for me to not trust him. He also said he had been aware this entire time thst I had been lying to him, which I had done more times than I could remember or count. I felt so disgusted with myself and I desperately wished there was a way i could fix this.

If I was in his shoes, I’d definitely feel mad that someone didn’t trust me when all I’ve done is look out for them.

Do I even deserve him?

I silently asked myself as I forced myself to pull away from the kitchen ground, which take a lot more willpower than it’s supposed to. Which was because I felt weak down to my bones.

I dragged myself to the room, over to my side of the room. I let my eyes wander over the bed which we never make use of. It sent a painful feeling through my insides and a sob spilled past my lips as I averted my gaze from it and reached the closet where my things are in.

I pulled it open and pulled out my box from it.

There was nothing I could do right now except listen to him. He had asked me to leave, and I have no other choice than to do that, even though it was hurting me to even think of.

"You don’t deserve him." I said aloud to myself while trying to control my tears.

"You don’t deserve him at all." I whispered, voice breaking due to the tears rolling down my cheeks.

I felt like a zombie as I fell to my knees and shoved my box open and began to throw in anything I could lay my hands on, which I couldn’t clearly see because of the tears swimming in my eyes right now.

I grabbed another handful of clothes and was about to shove them into my box when his scent suddenly hit me right in the face. I hastily wiped my eyes and looked through the handful of clothes, spotting the one currently emitting his scent in copious waves.

It was a shirt that belonged to him, the exact one which he wore me on that particular day whereby I had been jealous after spotting him with two omegas in the hall. That was when he revealed to me that no one had ever worn his shirt before.

A new wave of tears sprang into my eyes and I buried my face in the shirt as my shoulders shook from how hard I sobbed into the piece of fabric.

I couldn’t believe that I wouldn’t get to be with him any longer.

This one time that I had come to experience genuine happiness with him, along with so many other emotions which I had never experienced with anyone else before. The fact that I wouldn’t get to experience them again made more tears spill over again.

I knew I was being pathetic but I didn’t care. There was nothing more pathetic than me ruining this perfect thing I had with him with my own hands.

I still had my face buried in his shirt when I felt footsteps behind me which instantly made me stiffen. I abruptly pull the shirt away and whirl around, wide eyes settling on Blaze in the next second.

The breath got knocked out of my lungs by his presence and a new round of tears welled up in my eyes because his presence was a reminder of what I wouldn’t get to have any longer.

As I sobbed, I pressed my hands against my eyes and kept whispering how sorry I am over and over again, along with a bunch of incoherent words.

I didn’t hear him move, but I suddenly felt strong arms wrapping around me, pulling me into a solid chest and I sobbed harder as I scrambled to hold him tight, never wanting to ever let go.