Bastian
Chapter 181 - So, Sincerely

✧So, Sincerely✧

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Driven by some unseen desire, the securely shut door of the room swung open once more. Bastian crossed the bedroom and he dropped her onto the bed. The firm grip of Odette’s arms around his neck pulled him down after her.

 Their entwined bodies tumbled onto the bed, stirring dust that danced in the golden afternoon sunlight filling the room. Odette looked at him, there was ravenous hunger in his eyes, like a famished beast that left her breathless.

   You will regret this. A voice played in Odette’s mind. The warning came from reason that she could barely hear any more. It didn’t seem to matter, their relationship was stained with a hundred other mistakes, what’s one more?

   Odette gave in to her lust and stretched her arms out above her head, giving herself to him freely. She hugged him and kissed him deeply, revelled in the feel of Bastian on top of her, pressing into her hips, caressing her waist. It was a declaration that she was going to hurt him and that he could hurt her.

His kiss deepened with a fierce passion, their tongues intertwining in a heated dance. Their breaths, warm and intertwined, became indistinguishable from one another.

   Odette clung to him as their desire reached a critical point, their hearts captivated by an unfamiliar thrill. As his hand gently cupped her cheek, fingers brushing through her hair, she let out a soft moan and their breathing grew more intense.

   Bastian pushed himself up, lowered his suspenders and pulled of his wet shirt, while Odette practically ripped off her dress and bra. Before a hint of embarrassment could surface, they were lost in another fervent kiss. She surrendered to his embraces, each touch igniting her senses. His intensity grew, a wild passion in his movements, but Odette found herself not wanting to run away. 

His lips trailed down the back of her neck, gently biting her breast. Shivering at the sensation, Odette clutched his shoulder for support.

   Each kiss made her twitch and she moaned, feeling her breathing becoming deeper and more rapid. When his head moved down between her thighs and he kissed her on her most sensitive area, she heard a voice whimpering, but quickly realised it was her own voice, lost in the pleasure of his tongue delving into her.

Her skirt was smoothly removed, and her panties had vanished, leaving her exposed. Odette’s misty eyes fluttered open to see Bastian atop her naked body. His sun-kissed, scar-marked body was like a majestic ruin –marked by life’s trials, yet still strong and beautiful.

Suddenly, Odette found herself wondering how she looked like in Bastian’s eyes. When they had mated like wild animals,  she had avoided this thought. Was she, in his view, merely a woman destined to fulfil a duty of revenge, bearing his child? The question now lingered in her mind, unbidden yet insistent.  

There was a moment when she lost in his gaze. Her heart ached, still, she couldn’t tear her eyes away from him. She didn’t even know what she was searching for in his eyes – just like now.

Bastian leaned down, pressing another kiss in her private part. Odette shook her head, gently held his face in her hands. “Bastian…” she moaned, brushing her fingers through his hair. 

Bastian stopped his touch and looked at her, his eyes filled with lust, but also a tenderness that she had never seen before. 

In his eyes sparkled a warmth reflecting his deep affection – he saw in her the warmth of a dog, the woman he loved, and the family and children he had built with her.

Theodora’s voice, echoing the dreams he deeply yearned for but had forever lost, still rang in his ears. Perhaps his stepmother was the one who truly understood him the most in this world. It was this understanding that gave her the power to shatter him so completely.

But then, Bastian, what have you got? 

In Odette’s quiet gaze, Bastian could read that cruel question. And in the silence that followed, the answer was easy to find.

Nothing.

He finally found the elusive answers he’d been seeking. His desire of becoming a good man, even at the last minute, fell apart into nothingness. The only thing he had left was himself, a man that was as pitiful as she was.

 He turned toward the window, to a stream of sunlight piercing through the crack and felt a sense of deep shame. 

There was a hatred in his heart for this unstoppable desire, even at this moment. He wanted to plunge into the abyss, to be a hot beast with no hope of anything. It was better to remain an immoral scoundrel for the rest of his life if he could not end it.

   “Bastian?”

His beautiful siren sang her song again. Bastian turned back to her and kissed her deeply as he spread her legs and felt him plunge deep inside her opened body.  

The sound of the outside world, which Odette had forgotten in the excitement, came rushing back to her. The sound of children playing, the conversations of those walking down the road.  The everyday sounds of chatter and laughter from passersby and the birds singing in the tree branches, mingled with the moans that slipped from her lips. 

Her vision blurred as Bastian reached the deepest part of her. Odette fought to keep her moans quiet as their entwined bodies shook. She tried to call out to him, but Bastian was lost in the passion of their kiss, capturing her lips and every whisper of sound she made. Each of his thrust sent shivers through her, making the old bed creak and groan as if it might break apart.

Odette surrendered to his violence in her bittersweet illusion. She felt dizzy, unable to gather her scattered senses.

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“Bastian.”

   His name spilled out of her lips in between her breathless moans and blending with his panting. 

Odette gently unwrapped her arms from Bastian’s sweaty back and covered her face, struggling to look at him as he avoided her gaze. 

After suckling on her tits like a nursing babe, Bastian slowly sat up. His expression was one of deep pleasure, but his eyes were distant and calm. With every breath, the veins in his neck throbbed noticeably.

“Bastian, I, ah… … .” Odette wanted to say that she couldn’t take any more, but he grabbed her wide open legs and plunged so deep inside her. 

Her mind went suddenly blank. She trembled even harder as his actions became wilder.The sound of wet flesh pounding against one another was all that could be heard every time he thrust into the deepest part of her.

Odette caught up in the overwhelming flow of pleasure and felt helpless. She tried to stifle the sound by biting her lips, but her soft moans still escaped, drowning out the noise coming from outside the window. She was lost in the throws of shame and pleasure. At once, pushing him away, but wanting him close. She kissed him, scratched him, dug her nails into his back.

 Bastian let her rudeness but never once looked at her, he either nuzzled into her neck, looked down at her swollen breasts or looked up at some distant point. The colder he ignored her, the more her lust grew, leaving Odette in a state of confusion, just like those nights of humiliation all over again, where she felt like a rotten piece of meat.

A bell chimed in the distance, heralding the coming of night.  Through the gaps in the curtains, a gentle golden light bathed the two nude lovers lying on the bed. They moved together in an intense beat, as if engaged in a fierce dance of battle, their kisses were wild, full of intimacy and intoxicating warmth.

Odette pressed her lips fiercely against his face, holding him tightly.  “Bastian, I… don’t like it.” she said, a single word that stood contrast to her gesture that was passionately devouring him. 

Bastian immediately lowered his gaze when he heard her whisper and realised what he’d done.

  “Don’t do that, I don’t like it,” Odette said, she cupped his cheeks using all her will to stop him from looking away.  A bitter smile appeared on Bastian’s lips as he realised the meaning hidden behind her gaze.

“I…ah… … !”

Without warning, Bastian wrapped his arms around her and picked her up. The thrill sent a spasm through her and she squealed and wrapped her arms around his neck, clinging tightly to him. He pulled the hairpin out of her dishevelled hair and threw it away. Again, he began thrusting in earnest, shaking Odette with all his might, as if to break her. 

Her loose hair slid down her white, trembling back like wild black waves. With panting breaths and sobbing sounds that could be heard between her moan, Odette leaned against Bastian’s shoulders, solid as armour. She struggled to lift her head to look at him. But she persisted, even though she felt helpless with the huge difference in strength between them.

   The thrill of those cold blue eyes on her turned to anger. Bastian grabbed a bunch of her hair in his fist and pushed, making her head lean back to face the bed once more. 

 “Please, Bastian!” Odette hit him mercilessly, shoving him and twisting her body against him. “Please…”

Bastian stopped when her plea came between sobs. He understood that she was never going to give up, so let her go and gave her a cheeky smile. Odette looked at him furiously and pounced on him, her fists pounding his shoulders and chest as they went. 

Now Odette was on top, she was in control and Bastian could do nothing but succumb to the unrelenting force that was now unleashed.

   She bent down and pressed his shoulder firm.  “Look at me,” she demanded, Bastian did not resist. “Look at me, Bastian.” She swallowed her tears and begged hatefully.

Bastian opened his eyes and stared into those turquoise eyes swollen with tears.  Her eyes were like mirrors, baring the depths of his soul that raged within. Those eyes made him uneasy as they touched upon the deepest and inescapable parts of him.

As the light slowly dimmed, they found themselves locked in a tender, wordless gaze.

 She stared into his deep blue eyes, filled with her reflection. They were like pools of calm water, there was no trace of contempt or hatred, neither compassion or pity. They were merely cool and soft like evening summer. The longing look, the tender gaze she had yearned for. Like a shimmering oasis in the midst of a parch desert, the eyes that seemed like the beautiful illusion of the past

What emotion came before feelings like pity and hatred?

 Even though their relationship was entirely contractual, there were moments when Bastian looked at her like this. 

It felt genuine…filled with both hope….and despair. 

Odette’s confusion grew. Between them there was a dialogue of unspeakable feelings, unspeakable grief mixed with hidden joy, deep shame mixed with unfulfilled desires. These strong emotions made heat of emotion coursing through her, she felt her already flushed face grow even hotter.

   “It looks like you don’t hate it any more,” Bastian chuckled, holding her waist as she tried to move away.

“Ah…” Odette looked down.  Looking at her, it wasn’t hard to guess what was making her stomach feel hot and flushed. The same hot sensation was also running through her bottom,

“Shall we continue, sister?” He said and Odette became astutely aware that he was still inside her.

 “Don’t call me that,” she said, flushing with embarrassment. Bastian smiled at her and lifted her up.

   “Then, Miss Byller?”

   Odette moaned softly as he moved hips, testing the pressure of him pushing against the inside of her stomach. She could already feel her consciousness fade as the mix of him looking up at her with his curious smile, and the feel of his hardness pushing her open.

   “Odette…” She had the words out of her mouth as she twisted her waist. Bastian remained silent, even though their bodies were intertwined. Odette. The name, which came out as she struggled to breathe, made she felt more confused. “I-I don’t know.” Odette shook her head slightly. “I don’t know what I should do? ”

Odette’ face flushed up to her ears and neck. Bastian was puzzled by her question at first. Then he burst out laughing and wiped her sweaty brow.

The memories he was creating were turning into wounds that never quite healed. But he was willing to try and accept that it hurt.  He didn’t mind waking up each morning with the taste of lost on his lips.

He didn’t want to be the one to win in this game of love.

It was his most sincere heart that Theodora did not know about, and perhaps she did not even know about it. 

He pursued the sweet sensuality within her. Like watching an elegant dance, it was at once  wickedly  seductive and radiantly beautiful. 

The harsh breathing and moaning between them grew louder as the sounds of their flesh collided faster and faster. Odette, at the end of her tether, collapsed into Bastian’s arms. Lovingly, Bastian kissed her messy hair, then sat up to hold her, biting her flushed cheeks. Odette trembled at his touch, there was confusion on her adorable face. 

The violent shaking of the bed and the creaking of the old floorboards added a dramatic undertone to their love making scene, their sounds blending with the crescendo of their climactic moans.

Bastian never looked away from his enchanting siren, singing like a beautiful sunrise. His heart, like that of a shipwrecked ship, had found its place of rest.

It was a sweet surrender, a victory in the guise of defeat.

*.·:·.✧.·:·.*

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