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Chapter 303: Three hundred - s - "Rin, I’m so sad

Chapter 303: Three hundred Chapters - "Rin, I’m so sad

Saya tilted her head, apparently unable to comprehend the meaning in his words.

The torrential rain soaked her golden hair. Even the delicate hair accessories skewed sideways, and her western-style dress clung to her body, making her look disheveled.

She approached him, squatted down, and spoke softly.

"Rin," she said, "do you know? When I heard from Ralar that you wanted to kill me, I was truly sad, very sad..."

"Saya," Su Ming’an said, "do you know? From here, when I saw you walking up to the rooftop with Nailuo, I was also truly disappointed, very disappointed."

"Disappointed?" Saya’s voice trembled, "Disappointed that I am from the Soul Clan—is it this fact that makes you disappointed? Disappointed in this identity?"

"You were never meant to be from the Soul Clan."

"Yes, I wasn’t supposed to be," Saya’s face was streaked with rain, "I was clearly just an ordinary human... but from the day I was successfully converted, I knew that if Valen wasn’t controlled in time, if the Soul Hunt on the ship wasn’t controlled, what awaited me was the most despairing end."

She bowed her head, her hair sticking to her face: "...I cannot just sit and wait for death, I cannot wait to be tested and found out, I cannot... cannot be dominated by hunger and desire. Rin... Su Rin! I didn’t want to be killed, I could only take the initiative... This is the survival law of the Soul Clan. Do you understand, Su Rin? As an ordinary human, as a being with the happiest identity, as someone who never has to worry about being found out... can you understand the feeling of surviving in such a gap?"

Over her, a tumult of emotions mingled with the sea breeze, following the cold raindrops as they fell to the ground.

Su Ming’an was silent, watching her.

This lady, dignified and cheerful when they first met, this girl with sunshine-like beautiful and bright hair, now stood in the storm, disheveled, with red eyes, roaring at him like a madman.

"—Rin. Do you know that feeling? On ordinary days, I would really think I was human, but on some nights, when I suddenly feel hunger, I would be shocked to realize that I had already become a completely different monster from before..." She raised her hands, blood-red nails extending from her fingertips, her gaze filled with utter despair: "I have no choice... I have no choice! I could only turn my cherished grandfather into my most loyal guardian, I could only... seek an opportunity to board this Yate Vessel, seeking a space for my own survival..."

As she spoke, her hand suddenly slammed down heavily on the ground.

"Boom!"

With a loud noise,

her seemingly fragile and delicate hand, as if it had never touched the waters of spring, with a single pat, the ground beneath caved in.

"You, do you see it, Rin?" Saya stared at him. "I have already become a monster, there’s no going back, I can only, I can only..."

While speaking, her nails unconsciously began to scrape against the ground, repeating the mechanical action like self-harm, blood starting to ooze from her fingertips.

Her nails broke, blood spilled out, then the wounds began to heal, nails regrowing... she continued scraping against the ground as if impervious to pain, breaking her nails and then watching them slowly regrow.

"Does Valen know that he has been converted into the Soul Clan?" In the silence, Su Ming’an suddenly asked.

Saya looked up sharply, her blood-red eyes staring at him: "...he doesn’t know."

She said softly, "This is also why I am in despair... I never knew I was from the Soul Clan until such, such a damn moment... when I start feeling hungry, I cannot help myself, I would suddenly realize this damned identity, like disaster suddenly befalling..."

"Saya, believe me, it’s not the worst yet," Su Ming’an looked at her. "Since you weren’t born from the Soul Clan, there must be flaws in your conversion. I have never heard before that the Soul Clan could be converted from humans, which means the technology must be immature, otherwise the Yate Empire would have already become a paradise for the Soul Clan."

Listening to his words, Saya froze slightly.

"Saya, who converted you?" Su Ming’an asked. "As long as we find him, we will surely find a way for you to return to normal."

Saya stared at him.

Her blood-red eyes silently observed him, mixed with particularly complex emotions.

"You were just talking about killing me," she said softly.

"You aren’t the perpetrator, but the victim," Su Ming’an said. "You aren’t a naturally born Soul Clan, but a normal human being converted by someone. You should be a Savior, not one to be hated, I suddenly realized this."

"...You aren’t disappointed anymore?"

"Not disappointed."

"...You don’t hate me?"

"No."

The light in Saya’s eyes flickered.

She said, "I... can’t really remember either."

Su Ming’an frowned slightly.

"Only when I encounter certain specific situations do some of my memories awaken," she said softly, "like how only when I’m hungry do I realize that I’m from the Soul Clan and have memories of committing evil as a Soul Clan member. Those memories are only awakened at that time...and when I’m back to normal, I really believe that I’m just an ordinary human... The same goes for the memories related to that Converter. I only remember who he is when I see him again..."

"But I remember..." She paused, then continued, "he had... pitch-black hair, a pair of dark, bloody eyes that were different from normal Soul Clan members. He asked to meet me at the mansion, then suddenly attacked me, converting me... turning me from a human into this detestable form..."

Pitch-black hair, dark red eyes.

Su Ming’an thought hard but couldn’t recall anyone related to those features.

While he was pondering, Saya suddenly turned around and dragged Nailuo, who was beside her, over.

"Rin, look, this is Miss Nailuo," she said, pulling Nailuo’s hair, lifting her up, and Nailuo showed a pained expression.

Su Ming’an’s expression remained unchanged.

"I’m so foolish, truly. The human form of me is just too naive," Saya said. "...How could I have suggested such a proposition as having Rin and her undergo marriage? I could have gathered all the wealth onto us, there was no need for such a foolish method of marrying... The human form of me was too adorable, too sincere... naively to the point that it hurts my heart..."

Nailuo was covered in blood. She seemed to want to struggle, and the bag wrapped around the long spear trembled behind her, but the strength of a Soul Clan member was far greater than hers. With just one punch from Saya, she bent over in pain and couldn’t struggle for a moment.

"Saya," Su Ming’an spoke up, "don’t let the desires of the Soul Clan dominate you, remember what you just said."

He remembered. Saya had clearly said earlier that she hated the identity of the Soul Clan, preferring to just be a happy ordinary human.

But now, holding Nailuo, with even brighter red in her eyes, she said that she hated that human form of herself.

...Desire and strength change a person’s thoughts.

This transformation, so natural, affects all aspects of a person, and is hard for them to notice on their own.

Listening to Su Ming’an’s words, Saya’s gaze halted for a moment.

She suddenly let go, as if pricked sharply by a needle, stepped back several paces, and stared at her own hand with extreme fear, as if wanting to cut it off.

"Why, why do I have such thoughts..." Her lips quivered, and tears nearly fell from her eyes.

"Yes, I’m sorry, Miss Nailuo, I am truly sorry... I..."

She kept apologizing, moving forward, trying to help Nailuo, who was lying on the ground.

At this moment, her behavior and manner were very much like a graceful young lady, just like when Su Ming’an first saw her.

... If one could overlook the red in her eyes and the large blood stains on her.

Su Ming’an silently watched this absurd scene, as if witnessing a farce playing out before his eyes.

"Miss Nailuo, I am so sorry, I, let me help you up..."

Saya reached out her hand, seemingly very eager to help the girl on the ground.

But the next moment, a deeper red light once again covered her eyes.

Her step faltered, then she suddenly hugged herself, trembling all over.

It was as if two sets of thoughts were struggling within her; the torrential rain fell heavily on her hair, clinging to her like seaweed, and she became utterly still for a moment, like a stake driven into the ground.

After a silence that felt like death, she suddenly lifted her head.

"Rin," she began, her voice containing a trace of stillness, "you would understand me, wouldn’t you?"

Su Ming’an looked at her.

"I have no choice, to avoid being killed by the Soul Hunt, I can only act first," she said. "Rin, death is a very painful thing; even for the sake of stability, for the sake of some greater good, I wouldn’t just go and face it... I just want to live, simply live..."

If Grandfather Valen hadn’t died, I wouldn’t have become overly emotional and remembered my identity as a Soul Clan member," she said softly. "The Yate Vessel... wouldn’t have turned out this way, nothing should have happened like this..."

"Yes, it shouldn’t have happened this way, the Yate Vessel... the Yate Vessel, it is... the Empire’s hope." She fell silent for a moment, then suddenly said, "During the long voyage, it will surely arrive safely at the other shore... it will bring future glory to the Yate..."

"No one will have any trouble, and no one will die... It’s simply impossible that a detestable Soul Clan could mix upon the great ship; we will all be very safe..."

As she spoke, she seemed to fall into a self-hypnotic Illusion Realm-like state, smiling at him.

Blinding white lightning flashed behind her, illuminating the thick dark clouds like a streak of fire. Her cheeks were dusted with the white glow, and the gleam in her eyes visibly clear.

"[Rin, you don’t need to worry.]"

"[The Yate Vessel is acclaimed by the Yate Empire as an everlasting pearl, the hope of the Empire’s ocean expeditions, it surely won’t be capsized by a mere storm..."]"

She spoke softly.

"..." Su Ming’an quietly watched her speak the familiar words, watched her scarf flutter in the brisk sea wind, watched her speak as if she was still in a dream.

He saw her stand up in the storm, the rain soaking her hair.

...watched as she suddenly burst into tears.

She once excitedly asked him to dance in the lower cabin as night fell, dressed in simple clothing, moving swiftly like a bird pouncing toward freedom.

But now, the girl simply stared at him with blood-red eyes amidst the rainstorm.

Complex emotions struggled and flowed in her eyes; she alternated between laughter and tears, like a madwoman who had lost her mind.

Suddenly, her expression stilled, and the red in her eyes finally overwhelmed the clarity.

"So." She drew close to him, her face near his neck, "You can understand me, can’t you, Rin?"

Su Ming’an: "..."

"Rin, you are so strong... You suddenly became very strong. Although I don’t know when Rin became so powerful, I am really happy, so happy..."

"The family of Rin finally doesn’t have to worry about decline anymore. Such a formidable Rin can surely help the family rejuvenate, and Rin won’t have to marry that arrogant woman either..."

"Of course, Rin, you so powerful... can surely help me too, right?"

She whispered lower and lower:

"Just help me this once, okay? With Grandpa Valen dead, my identity is exposed. If I don’t consume the souls of powerful humans, I could easily fall back into starvation... "

"Rin, you surely wouldn’t want to see me die, right...?"

As she spoke, she paused beside him for a moment, then suddenly began to sob again:

"But, but I feel so sad, so very sad... Why am I this sad..."

Su Ming’an moved his fingers.

The effect of the anesthetic was gradually wearing off, and his vision began to clarify.

He saw Saya stand up abruptly.

It was as if two emotions were fighting at the bottom of her eyes, spreading and growing wildly; she-self-harmingly pressed her nail-extended hand onto her arm, causing blood to ooze out.

"Rin, I’m so sad." She cried as she spoke, "I don’t want to kill you, I really don’t want to kill you..."

Sharp teeth ground against her lips, seemingly eager to move, yet she forcibly bit down on her lip to conceal them.

Blood appeared at the corners of her mouth; she suddenly looked at him, her eyes more brilliant than ever.

The wind and rain struck her face, her hair trailing behind her like a fading ray of sunlight. In the somewhat dark vision, her hair was like the early morning sun gradually rising in the night.

In a moment of stillness, she suddenly spoke softly, her voice breathy and fast as if she were using every inch to breathe:

"Rin."

"Kill me. Quick."

As she uttered these words, Saya felt an unprecedented lightness to her burden.

The pain that clung to her body like dampness was distinctly evident on her now.

Su Ming’an watched this scene in silence, moving his hand.

The effect of the anesthetic still lingered, preventing him from releasing a Spatial Vibration.

In this brief silence, the Rationality in Saya’s eyes disappeared completely.

Her eyes were bloodshot, the silky brightness inside gleaming as she walked over, tears on the brink of slipping away with inertia.

She reached out, grasped his shoulder, and Su Ming’an slightly furrowed his brow, feeling a pain from his neck.

"Shh!"

The expression on the girl’s face froze in that second.

Like a thin shard of shattered porcelain, the brilliance in her eyes broke apart, as if she had suddenly found Redemption.

Ming’an stood behind her, his sword impaled through her heart.

In that moment, she pushed him away and lifted her chin slightly.

"So it was you..." She stared into his eyes and suddenly uttered an incongruous statement.

Suddenly, she laughed.

The rain invaded her eyes, her smile containing a hint of Despair and relief.

"Rin." She softly said, "...I feel so sad."

The next moment, her words came to an abrupt halt.

Like a spire submerged by floodwaters, she collapsed into the bloody waters, her golden hair sinking down like a serpent in the water.

Ming’an sheathed his sword and came over, glancing at the two people on the ground.

"She bit you?" Ming’an spoke, "Sorry, I was still too late."

"It’s okay, I shouldn’t be transformed so easily..." Su Ming’an moved his body, feeling the effect of the drug fading away.

He slowly got up to support the unconscious Nailuo, checking her injuries.

Suddenly, through the layer of pounding rain, he saw the shocked expression on Ming’an’s face.

"Wait, your eyes..." Ming’an said, surprised.

Su Ming’an was startled.

"What’s wrong with my eyes?" He touched the corner of his eye, feeling nothing amiss.

"You... you look for yourself." Ming’an seemed hesitant.

Su Ming’an quickly brought out the System Mirror.

The youth with sticky black hair appeared in the mirror, soaked with rainwater, staring back at him, his appearance somewhat disheveled.

Splatters of blood stained his cheeks, water rippling across his face.

In his eyes, there was a layer of dark, reddish glow, like a slowly dispersing tide of cold blood.

He stared at the mirror for a moment, then suddenly fiercely recalled what Saya had just said.

...

"[The one who transformed me...]"

"[He has... a head of jet-black hair.]"

"[A pair of eyes unlike those of ordinary Soul Clan, a dark, blood-hued shade.]"

...

"[Rin.]"

"[...I feel so sad.]"

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