Villainous Instructor at the Academy
Chapter 79: Art of mockery

Chapter 79: Art of mockery

The silence didn’t last long.

Not when I was still in the mood to stir the pot.

"You know..." I drawled, stretching my legs out as I leaned back against the cave wall. "I was just thinking..."

Mira groaned. "Professor... no."

"Oh, come on," I smirked, ignoring her warning. "This is important. Deeply educational, even."

Julien cracked one eye open, his voice dripping with skepticism. "Why do I feel like I’m about to regret this?"

"Because you’re smart." I pointed at him, lips twitching. "But not smart enough to avoid getting tossed around by an angry wind mage."

Julien’s eye twitched. "That was—"

"An excellent display of how not to fight someone stronger than you," I cut in smoothly, my tone almost academic. "In fact, I might use it as a teaching example."

"A teaching example?" Julien’s eyebrow twitched again.

"Absolutely," I nodded solemnly. "We can title it ’How to Charge Headfirst into Death: A Case Study.’"

Mira choked on a laugh.

Julien... not so much.

"Professor..." he growled, his grip tightening on the hilt of his sword.

"Relax, Julien," I waved him off. "It’s not just you."

I turned, my gaze shifting toward Felix.

"Felix."

Felix flinched, eyes widening. "I... I didn’t do anything!"

"Exactly." I sighed dramatically. "And that’s the problem."

Felix blinked. "Wait, what?"

"You froze." I tapped my temple. "Mid-fight. You had options. You could’ve dodged left, rolled right, hell—" I shrugged. "Even tripping over your own feet would’ve been more effective."

"I panicked!" Felix sputtered. "He was throwing wind blades at me!"

"Ah yes," I nodded thoughtfully. "Because standing perfectly still in the face of death was definitely the right call."

Leo snorted.

"Leo," I turned on him, eyes narrowing.

His smirk vanished instantly. "Uh..."

"Oh, don’t think I forgot you," I said, my voice dangerously calm. "Tell me, Leo..."

"What?" he squeaked.

"When exactly..." I paused, leaning forward slightly. "Did you decide that running around in circles like a headless chicken was a valid battle strategy?"

Mira slapped a hand over her mouth, shoulders shaking.

Julien wasn’t even trying to hide his grin anymore.

Leo’s face turned beet red. "I was distracting him!"

"Distracting him?" I raised an eyebrow. "Leo, you were running in circles. You looked like a damn circus act."

"It worked... kind of..." he mumbled.

"Kind of?" I tilted my head. "He ignored you."

"Exactly!" Leo’s expression brightened. "So technically—"

"Don’t." I held up a hand. "Don’t try to spin this into a win, Leo. It hurts me. Physically."

Leo’s mouth snapped shut.

"Professor..." Mira tried, but I could see the amusement in her eyes.

"Oh no, Mira..." I turned toward her, my grin widening.

Her smile faded. "Wait... what?"

"You’re not off the hook."

"What did I do?" She blinked, looking genuinely confused.

"Oh, where do I begin?" I tapped my chin thoughtfully. "How about that moment when you tried to shadow-step behind Kellan and ended up right in front of him instead?"

Mira’s jaw clenched. "That was..."

"An impressive display of teleporting directly into danger." I nodded, deadpan. "Truly, you have mastered the art of surprise."

Felix coughed to hide his laugh.

"I was trying to flank him!" Mira hissed.

"And instead, you flanked yourself."

Mira’s death glare could’ve probably melted steel.

But I wasn’t done yet.

"Wallace..." I drawled, shifting my gaze toward the poor kid who was barely staying conscious.

"Professor..." Wallace croaked, his voice weak.

"You..." I shook my head slowly. "I can’t even be mad. You drained yourself so badly that I thought you died halfway through."

Wallace let out a weak groan, closing his eyes. "I was... maintaining the barrier..."

"For five minutes after it was gone."

Wallace’s eyes snapped open. "Wait, what?"

"Oh yeah," I nodded, lips twitching. "You were standing there, pouring mana into thin air while we were all getting torn apart."

"I..." Wallace blinked, processing.

"Don’t worry," I added with a smirk. "At least you looked impressive doing it."

Wallace groaned again, covering his face with his hands.

And finally...

"Cassandra."

Her head tilted slightly, those eerie eyes of hers meeting mine.

"You vanished." I narrowed my eyes. "Again."

"I was..." she murmured softly, "gathering information."

"Really?" I arched an eyebrow. "Because to me, it looked like you were sightseeing while we were getting shredded."

Cassandra blinked, her expression unreadable.

"What vital information did you gather, exactly?" I asked, crossing my arms.

She didn’t answer.

"That’s what I thought."

The silence stretched for a moment before—

"Professor..." Julien muttered, trying to keep a straight face.

"What?" I blinked innocently.

"You’re an ass."

"Took you this long to figure that out?" I smirked, leaning back again.

That did it.

Laughter erupted.

Even Wallace, half-dead as he was, managed a weak chuckle.

The tension in the air finally eased, the weight that had been pressing down on them lifting just a little.

"Alright, alright," I murmured, letting the laughter die down. "You all did better than most would’ve in that situation."

Julien blinked, surprised. "Wait... was that a compliment?"

"Don’t get used to it," I grunted. "You survived. That’s the bare minimum."

Mira’s lips twitched. "Bare minimum, huh?"

"Yup." I stretched out my legs again. "Which means next time? No excuses. No slip-ups. We’re not just surviving."

My eyes hardened as I met each of their gazes.

"We’re winning."

The cave fell silent again, but this time...

"Alright, future corpses," I drawled, cracking my neck as I stood up. "Since we’re all alive—barely—I think it’s time for a little... education."

The groans were instant.

"Professor..." Felix whined, dragging his hands down his face. "Now? Really?"

"Yes, now." I gave him a deadpan look. "Or should I wait until Kellan’s slicing you into ribbons again?"

Felix shut up real quick.

"Thought so." I paced in front of them, my cane tapping lightly against the stone floor. "Now..." I glanced around. "Let’s start with a fun little game."

Julien muttered under his breath. "Here we go..."

"Who can tell me what exactly went wrong back there?" I asked, spreading my arms wide. "Come on, don’t be shy. This is a safe space."

Mira snorted. "Safe? With you?"

"Emotionally safe, Mira. Emotionally." I smirked. "Physically? Absolutely not."

Silence.

"No one?" I clicked my tongue. "Alright. I’ll do it myself."

I pointed straight at Julien.

"Let’s start with you, Smartass."

"Why am I always first?" Julien grumbled but straightened.

"Because you’re loud and reckless," I said smoothly. "Tell me, Julien... What’s the first rule when fighting someone stronger than you?"

Julien blinked. "Uh... don’t die?"

"Correct, but that’s the last rule." I gave him a look. "First rule? Never engage head-on."

Julien’s jaw clenched.

"Kellan was stronger. Faster. More experienced." I tapped my temple. "So, what did you do?"

"Charged him..." Julien muttered, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Like a damn battering ram," I finished. "Against someone whose specialty is literally controlling the air. Brilliant strategy, really. Very inspiring."

"I thought—"

"No, you didn’t think, Julien." I cut him off, voice flat. "That’s the problem. You reacted. Instinct’s fine, but only when it’s trained. Yours? Still too raw."

Julien’s jaw clenched tighter, but he gave a sharp nod.

"Good." I didn’t let up. "Now, Mira."

Her eyes narrowed. "What?"

"You rely too much on your shadows." I pointed at her. "When Kellan forced you into the open, you panicked."

"I didn’t panic—"

"You teleported into his damn line of sight." I crossed my arms. "Mira, your strength is in misdirection. But against someone like Kellan? You need to control the flow of the fight. Not react to it."

Her lips pressed into a thin line, but she gave a curt nod.

"Felix."

"Oh, come on!" he whined, throwing his hands in the air.

"No complaints." I leveled a look at him. "You froze."

"I didn’t freeze!" Felix protested.

"Really?" I tilted my head. "Because from where I was standing, you looked like a statue waiting to be turned into mulch."

Felix grumbled something under his breath but didn’t argue.

"And Leo."

Leo looked up, his eyes guarded.

"Your biggest mistake?" I crouched slightly, meeting his gaze. "You got too emotional."

His jaw clenched, but he didn’t look away.

"I get it," I said softly. "Kellan’s a monster. But letting fear control you? That’s a death sentence."

Leo gave a small, almost imperceptible nod.

"Wallace."

"I was maintaining the barrier—"

"For five minutes after it was gone," I reminded him, deadpan.

Wallace groaned softly, but I saw the realization sink in.

"Good effort, but wasted mana gets you killed," I said, tone lighter this time. "Conserve. Assess. Act."

Wallace gave a weak nod.

"And Cassandra..."

Her eerie, unreadable gaze met mine.

"You disappeared."

"I was gathering information," she murmured softly.

"And what did that information get us?" I raised an eyebrow.

Cassandra didn’t answer.

"Nothing," I finished for her. "Cassandra, your instincts are sharp, but sometimes? Being a ghost doesn’t win battles. Presence does."

She nodded slightly, her expression unreadable.

"Alright." I stood up, hands on my hips. "Now that I’ve thoroughly crushed your spirits..."

Felix groaned. "There’s more?"

"Oh, absolutely." I smirked. "Time for some strategy."

"Can’t we just... rest?" Julien grumbled.

"Sure." I smiled sweetly. "If you’d rather die next time."

Silence.

"That’s what I thought."

I tapped my cane against the floor.

"Lesson one," I began, my tone sharper. "When fighting a stronger opponent, control the battlefield. Always."

"Control?" Mira frowned. "How?"

"By creating variables they can’t account for." I glanced at her. "Smoke. Illusions. Terrain shifts. Anything that forces them to adapt to you."

"Like what you did with Kellan?" Julien’s eyes narrowed.

"Exactly." I nodded. "That illusion rune? It didn’t just hide the cave. It bought us time. Time to reset. Time to think."

"But Kellan’s too powerful," Felix muttered. "How do we control someone like that?"

"You don’t fight him," I said bluntly. "You fight around him."

Blank stares.

"Distract. Delay. Divide." I paced again, eyes narrowing. "Kellan’s strength is his control over wind. But if we force him to split his focus? He can’t control everything."

Julien’s eyes lit up. "Divide and conquer..."

"Exactly." I pointed at him. "Break his rhythm. Force him to react. The moment he’s reacting? He’s vulnerable."

Mira nodded slowly. "And if he’s vulnerable..."

"We strike."

"But... what if we can’t split his focus?" Leo asked softly.

"Then we don’t engage." I shrugged. "We retreat. Regroup. Pick the battlefield."

"We run?" Felix’s voice was skeptical.

"If it means living to fight another day? Hell yes." I met his gaze. "There’s no shame in retreating when it keeps you alive."

Silence filled the cave.

Good. They were processing.

"Lesson two," I said after a moment, voice softer. "Communication. You’re not fighting alone. You’re a unit. If you’re not talking to each other in a fight? You’re already dead."

Julien muttered, "We... weren’t exactly coordinated..."

"Understatement of the year." I gave him a look. "If I hear one more of you shouting vague shit like ’Look out!’ or ’Get him!’ I’m knocking you out myself."

Mira snorted. "So what do we say?"

"Call targets. Give positions. Short, clear commands. Less is more." I tapped my temple. "And trust each other. You don’t need to explain everything mid-battle."

"Got it," Julien murmured, eyes sharper now.

"Good." I finally stopped pacing, leaning against the wall again.

"Last lesson..." I murmured.

They all looked at me, waiting.

"Adapt or die." My voice was quiet, but the weight behind it was heavy.

"Plans are good. Strategy is better. But when everything goes to hell?" I met their eyes one by one.

"You adapt."

Silence.

"That’s how you win."

A beat passed.

"Understood?"

They all nodded.

"Good." I allowed a small smirk. "Now..."

I stretched out my arms.

"Get some rest."

Mira blinked. "What?"

"Rest." I repeated. "You’re no good to me half-dead."

"That’s... surprisingly merciful," Felix murmured.

"Oh, don’t get comfortable." I gave him a sharp grin. "We’re training the moment you wake up."

Groans echoed through the cave.

Good.

Because next time?

We weren’t going to lose.