Villainous Instructor at the Academy
Chapter 127: Antics of Felix

Chapter 127: Antics of Felix

The next morning, I found myself regretting my life choices again—mainly, choosing to teach Class C instead of faking my death and moving to the northern isles to sell dried fish.

The students were assembled. Barely. Leo was half-asleep. Garrick looked ready to punch someone, probably on accident. Wallace was fiddling with something I was absolutely sure would explode. Cassandra was cleaning her blade in eerie silence, and Mira was sipping tea like she hadn’t already cursed three people on the way here.

And then there was Felix.

Somehow, his arm was in a sling.

"Felix," I asked, rubbing my eyes, "what did you break this time?"

"...My dignity."

I nodded. "Ah. So nothing valuable."

He sniffled.

"Alright," I announced, "today we’re doing spell-response drills. You know, in case one of you ever faces someone who actually knows what they’re doing."

Wallace raised a hand. "Aren’t you supposed to teach us how to know what we’re doing?"

"Incorrect," I said. "I’m here to mock you while you figure it out. That’s called experiential learning."

"I don’t think that’s how it works."

"Who here has improved since I started teaching?"

Silence.

Then Cassandra raised her hand. Then Mira. Then, begrudgingly, Garrick.

Leo mumbled, "My posture’s better."

"See?" I grinned. "Flawless teaching method."

Felix raised his good arm. "I’ve gotten worse."

"And yet, I’m still proud," I said. "You’ve found consistency."

I drew a rune into the dirt with a stick and tapped it. A soft pulse of magic shimmered in the air.

"This," I said, "is a delay rune. When triggered, it activates a simple pulse a second later. I’ve tuned it to target movement. Your job is to not be in its range when it goes off."

Wallace frowned. "How do we know where the range is?"

I smiled. "That’s the fun part."

Leo stepped up first.

"Okay, I just wait and—"

THWUMP.

He flew backward ten feet, landed in a puff of dirt, and groaned.

"I moved like half a step!"

I patted him on the head. "Congratulations. You passed the ’how to test traps with your face’ lesson."

Garrick tried to brute force the rune by stomping on it.

It triggered.

The explosion launched him into the dummy rack.

He got up, dazed, and muttered, "Did... Did anyone get the rune’s license number?"

I gave him a thumbs up. "That one’s on the house."

Felix stepped forward, visibly shaking.

"Okay. I just need to watch it carefully. I won’t move. I won’t—"

He sneezed.

THWUMP.

He landed next to Leo.

"Why am I cursed?"

"Because fate is lazy and you’re easy."

Wallace tried to counter it with a mirror shard tuned to deflection.

It worked.

Until the reflected pulse hit Garrick.

Garrick screamed, charged Wallace, and they both crashed into the equipment shed.

I let out a long, satisfied sigh. "Music to my ears."

Finally, Mira stepped forward. Calm, calculating, eyes sharp.

She stepped once. The rune pulsed.

She ducked behind Cassandra.

The pulse hit Cassandra.

Cassandra blinked.

Then turned slowly to Mira.

Mira laughed nervously. "I... miscalculated?"

Cassandra said nothing.

She just stepped back into line, unsheathing her blade an extra inch.

Eventually, after several more failed attempts, the drill turned into what I could only describe as a magical version of musical chairs with more screaming.

At one point, Felix triggered three runes by tripping, which set off Wallace’s gadget, which caught Leo’s cloak on fire.

I watched from a safe distance, sipping tea.

"You know," I muttered to myself, "for a bunch of disasters, they’re starting to respond faster."

The chaos continued.

Smoke, shouting, someone (probably Garrick) swearing vengeance on all runes.

And yet... progress.

Terrifying, barely coherent progress.

Still, progress.

I glanced at the sky.

"Maybe I don’t need to fake my death just yet."

Then I saw Felix fall into a puddle, scream about his socks, and somehow trigger another rune with his elbow.

"...Maybe next week."

The smoke had barely cleared from our last exercise when Felix stumbled back into the training field, limping on one leg, dragging a charred cloak behind him like some war veteran of the Great Rune Explosion.

"I’m... I’m okay," he wheezed.

"Good," I said. "Round two."

"Wait, what?!"

"You thought that was the full session?" I scoffed. "Felix, that was the warm-up. The appetizer. The knock on the door before chaos breaks in with soup."

Wallace blinked. "Wait, chaos brings soup now?"

"Shut up, Gremlin. You’ll be busy."

I pointed to the five scattered training dummies now glowing faintly with runic energy.

"New drill. Dodge, counter, escape. The dummies will attack. You will react. If you don’t react fast enough—"

A dummy’s fist shot out and clotheslined Leo, who hadn’t even started moving yet.

Leo groaned from the ground. "I want a new life."

"Denied," I said. "You’re on the Class C payment plan: pain now, trauma later."

Mira and Cassandra, having returned after whatever mysterious business they were handling, stood to the side.

Mira twirled a charm between her fingers. "Want me to hex the dummies so they hit softer?"

Cassandra just blinked at her. "No."

Mira pouted. "It’d be funny."

"Wouldn’t change anything," I added. "Felix would still trip on his own shoelaces."

Felix looked down. "I... wait, these have laces?"

Wallace stepped up, confident, hands glowing with spell tech.

He tried to overload the dummy.

The dummy absorbed the spell, turned red, and punched him into a nearby tree.

"That was not supposed to happen," he coughed.

"Welcome to real combat," I said. "Where everything goes wrong and your best plan turns into a face full of bark."

Garrick went next. He blocked the first swing with his arms, took the second in the gut, and then bear-hugged the dummy to the ground.

"Is... is that allowed?" Leo asked.

"Technically?" I shrugged. "No. But I’m grading on style today."

Then Felix stepped forward.

I braced myself.

He took a deep breath, raised his hands, eyes narrowed in focus—

—and ran directly into the dummy’s punch.

It spun him like a top.

"FELIX!" I shouted. "THE ATTACK COMES AFTER YOU MOVE!"

"I panicked!"

"Your existence is panic!"

He wobbled back to his feet, dazed. "Did I do good?"

"You spun like a cursed weather vane," Mira offered helpfully.

Cassandra added, "He rotated five times."

"Five-point deduction for physics violation," I muttered.

The rest of the session was what I can only describe as beautiful disaster. Like watching a ballet choreographed by gremlins, set on fire, and performed with forks taped to everyone’s hands.

Leo accidentally tripped Wallace, who set off a minor fireball.

Felix tried to help but threw water spells that somehow boiled instead of doused.

"I don’t even have fire affinity!" he cried as steam rose around him.

"You’re evolving," I said. "In the wrong direction."

Eventually, I blew a whistle and waved them in.

"Congratulations," I said as they limped, groaned, or dragged themselves into formation. "You survived the lesson."

"Barely," Wallace grumbled.

"Pain is temporary," I replied. "Humiliation is permanent. Remember that."

Cassandra cleaned a scratch off her blade. "At least no one died."

"Yet," Mira added.

Leo whimpered. "Can I die now?"

"Not until finals," I assured him.

I turned away as they collapsed onto the grass, some groaning, some chuckling, and one (Felix) still spinning slightly in place.

It was chaos.

It was messy, ridiculous, half-functional chaos.

But it was ours.

And for now?

That was enough.

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