There's No Love In the Deathzone (BL)
Chapter 652: Side Story 2. Dance of Flame and Shadow - 11

Chapter 652: Side Story 2. Dance of Flame and Shadow - 11

One day, a frowning squirrel suddenly barged into Agni’s office, and, after staring at him silently for about five seconds, demanded as such from the door;

"Don’t come to see me for a while," the kid had told him. It was a rather calm...request--if not an order--but uttered with such intense gaze that Agni thought he was about to be cursed at.

"Huh?"

Naturally, Agni was dumbfounded. "How could I make sure you’re not running to the Deathzone if I don’t?"

"I won’t go," the squirrel replied swiftly.

"What?"

"I promise I won’t try to go, so just stop checking on me for a while."

Agni narrowed his eyes. Was this a trick to lower his guard? How could he believe this sly, sneaky squirrel?

Ron rolled his eyes at the dubious look the berserker gave him. "You can task other people to watch me, just not you."

What--so it wasn’t because he wanted to be left alone? Huh...so the kid just wanted to avoid his presence?

For some reason, this irked Agni. As the corner of his eyes twitched in annoyance, Agni asked dryly. "For how long is this ’a while’?"

"...I don’t know," the kid said unreasonably. "I’ll let you know if I’m ready."

And then he just left, closing the door loudly before running down the corridor. Agni blinked, more confused than annoyed now. "Ready...for what?"

Despite his confusion, Agni followed the request well. For weeks, he stopped coming to the kid to ask about the ’understanding’ journey and when Ron would go home for the umpteenth time. He saw the kid sometimes during meal times, but Agni didn’t approach the scout and just made sure the kid looked alright from afar.

He was worried at first, still thinking it was a ruse, and someone would suddenly come to his office telling him the kid had run off to the Deathzone again. But no such report came, and Agni started to feel calmer. He went about his work peacefully, trying to forget about the kid’s existence.

Or so he planned. But after weeks of not hearing anything, he became even more worried than when this whole thing started.

Why? Why was the kid being so quiet while avoiding him? It was alright at first, but wasn’t this getting further away from his plan to send the kid away? The more he spent his time in the Borderland, and the more he got used to it, the harder it would be for Agni to find a reason to kick him out without making an enemy out of the kid.

...should he just make himself be the bad guy and kick the kid no matter what?

"Ugh..." Agni ruffled his hair in frustration and slammed the file in front of him close.

He got up and found his way to the gate after asking some people about the kid’s whereabouts. There, he found Esther, who was in charge of the personnel flow.

"Where are you going, Cap? Sick of numbers already?" she asked with a smirk.

"Why ask if you know?" Agni grumbled, but his eyes were not on his deputy. They darted around the compound, deepening Esther’s smirk.

"I thought you had a deal with him," she raised her brow.

Agni narrowed his eyes, wondering who else knew about their agreement. Just her? The whole Unit?

Esther chuckled at the berserker’s dubious gaze and patted his shoulder. "He’s fine. He’s been spending his time in the archive and library, studying and training with us."

Far from reassuring, that statement only caused concern for Agni. A deep frown appeared on his forehead, making his already scary face look even more menacing. "He studied to climb two floors in less than two years because he wanted to come here. For all I know, he could be studying to get as far as he could inside the Deathzone."

"And what if he did?" Esther scoffed. "It’s not like he’s suicidal or anything. People had been shirking from their Deathzone’s duty, so isn’t it good that we have a volunteer at last?"

"What’s good about it?" Agni hissed. "He’s not supposed to be here in the first place--he’s not like us, Esther. He has a choice. He’s smart; he has a big potential--bigger than any of us. He can go to the green-zone and join a big guild, make a name for himself and live well. How can I let Nolan’s son rot in this place?!"

Esther smiled at the berserker’s increasing emotion. "Have you talked to him about that?"

"What?" Agni frowned. "Of course, I--"

"Not the ’you can’t stay here, get out’ way," Esther shook her head. "A real talk; try to make him understand your points while listening to him--have you done that? Listening to him?"

Agni paused and thought back. Listening...well, rather than not listening, Ron just said he wouldn’t understand, and they had never talked properly after that. Right. They had never talked properly after that.

"No, right?" Esther rolled her eyes and shook her head. "I thought you were communicating well in your room that time, but why is it that all you two had been doing afterward is bickering?"

"Ugh..."

"Not that I mind, since it was entertaining," Esther shrugged, and Agni glared at her grinning face.

Haa...talk, huh? Agni leaned against the gate and stared at the grey field outside. Perhaps he had been running away because he didn’t think he could have a good conversation with such a young person. Or...

Perhaps he was just afraid he would get emotional like the last time again. He still remembered how pathetic it made him feel, and he was probably afraid of feeling like that again.

But then again, this concern he had for the kid also felt uncomfortable, so...what’s the difference?

"Where is he now?" Agni straightened his back.

"The outpost," Esther replied, adding with a laugh when Agni was frowning again. "He just stays there, not even patrolling. I’ll tell the two to patrol together, so take your time."

Agni exhaled slowly, but he did move to the outpost before his will waned. He walked with his usual gait, but for some reason, the distance felt so short; before he knew it, he was already below the outpost. Esther had done her job and made the other two espers leave the box to patrol, so he found the young scout alone in the box, leaning on a viewfinder.

As expected of a scout, Ron turned around when he felt someone had come. "What’s wrong? You forget something aga--"

The younger’s voice faltered when he saw Agni, and he turned his head swiftly toward the marsh, away from the approaching berserker. "Why are you here?" he asked with a spike, fiddling with his jacket collar so it hid his neck and ear. "I haven’t said you can see me yet."

"It is the Captain’s duty to check the outpost periodically," Agni replied nonchalantly, heading toward the logistic table. "Otherwise, I wouldn’t know we’re out of fuel."

"It’ll be in today’s log," Ron mumbled while pressing his cheek against the railing, keeping his face away from the berserker’s eyes.

"It’s always better to check by myself," Agni grabbed a high stool beside the table and dragged it toward the window facing the marsh.

Ron flinched slightly as he felt the berserker’s presence approaching, grumbling inaudibly into the crook of his arm. Fortunately, Agni was sensible enough to keep his distance, and placed the chair a meter away from the young scout.

"Why are you still here? You’re already checking," Ron asked without looking at the berserker, just staring at the marsh.

And so did Agni. "I’m checking on the border too, it’s my job," he shrugged. "If anything, I should be the one who asks you that: why are you still here? What are you doing here exactly?"

Ron raised his head and snapped back with a frown. "Why are you so hell-bent on sending me away?"

"Because you shouldn’t be here!"

"Who are you to tell me that?!" Ron hit the railing with his hand. "Just because you promised him--" he stopped his words and returned to his seat while clicking his tongue, grumbling.

Agni closed his eyes and took a deep breath, willing himself to enter a meditative state and reminding himself again and again that he was there to talk, not to scream at each other. His fingers fiddled with the cigarette box in his coat pocket, fighting the urge to take a smoke.

In the end, he took his hand out and crossed his arms, exhaling slowly.

"Who am I? I’m someone who already spent five years here," he sneered, both to the young scout and to himself. "You’ve been here for weeks now; you should have known who are those people staying here. They are outcasts, criminals, people who have nowhere else to go--" he turned toward Ron, staring into the brown eyes. "But you’re not that."

The younger man blinked, looking back at Agni with widened eyes.

"Look at you," Agni pointed at the young esper with his hands. "You’re young, you’re smart, you’re clean--you have no criminal records, you were a model student. You can enter the top guild’s trial and pass their test--you were working for the association, for fuck’s sake!"

Again, he took a deep breath and massaged his temple. Truly, just looking at the resume this kid submitted to the headquarters already told him that Ron could succeed anywhere outside.

And that was the more reason Agni couldn’t let the kid stay.

"Do you know how many people in there wish they could go to the outside world, free, and have a normal job?" he pointed toward the Unit’s barrack. "So what are you doing here, wasting your time?"

"I...don’t think it’s a waste of time--"

"But it is!" Agni covered his face and sighed into his hand. "You’re wasting the time you can do to train and study more. You’re in your twenties--fuck, you just started!" he raised his head and looked at Ron with desperation. "Don’t you know espers peaked in their twenties?"

"Of course, I know!" Ron frowned, gripping the railing to control his emotion too. "But I also made this choice after thinking about it a lot."

Agni looked at the young esper with a deep frown, trying his best to push away his prejudice and believe the kid. "Really?"

"I..." Ron shifted back to face the side of the marsh, staring at the dark jungle on the horizon. "I don’t think I will be able to move on without doing this."

"What? Going to the Deathzone?"

"No, I..."

Ron pressed his lips, clearly refraining from answering again, just like that night when he said Agni might not understand. But if Agni stopped there, they wouldn’t be able to move forward, so he exhaled heavily and dragged his chair closer to the flinching scout.

"You told me you want to understand--what are you trying to understand?" he leaned forward and placed his arms on the railing, trapping the flustered squirrel between him and the corner of the outpost. "Tell me."

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