The world has turned into Hell's Game, why should I stay human?
Chapter 601 - 446 This CP is too bizarre for humans_2

Chapter 601: Chapter 446 This CP is too bizarre for humans_2

"Are you insane? With a tree? Even for humans, that’s just too weird."

Guo Koutangzi said.

During the process of teaming up to mess with Liu Zheng earlier, the three of them inexplicably became a bit closer.

"Isn’t it looking more and more human now? Besides, don’t you think Liu Zheng has a thing for arrogant types of females?"

Nightingale said.

"Who the hell’s being arrogant?"

Guo Koutangzi and Sea Girl said in unison.

"See, I told you I was right."

Nightingale shrugged and then glanced sympathetically at Vampire Sister.

"You’re done for, stupid bat. Liu Zheng would never like someone like you who throws herself at him."

"You’re talking nonsense. Liu Zheng definitely likes me the most—he always puts me on his shoulder."

Vampire Sister said smugly.

"Oh, sweet child, if a male likes a female, he absolutely wouldn’t put her on his shoulder."

Nightingale shook her head.

"Then where would he put her?"

Vampire Sister asked in confusion.

"Obviously, he’d put her right here."

Nightingale struck a vulgar pose.

"You! You’re so dirty-minded!"

Vampire Sister exclaimed, blushing furiously.

"What, that’s dirty? Don’t tell me you’re still a virgin."

"No way, no way—a virgin vampire? That’d be breaking news! Haha."

Nightingale let out an exaggerated laugh.

She truly found it hilariously absurd.

Immortal Species, due to their long lifespan, usually lean towards two extremes: either asceticism or indulgence.

Vampires are stereotypical hedonists, notorious for enjoying self-abuse and hosting wild orgies.

Of course, since they’re rather picky about their indulgent partners, they don’t rank too high on the depravity charts.

"Mind your own business! Hmph, as if Liu Zheng would prefer someone as vulgar as you."

Vampire Sister immediately retorted.

"Doesn’t matter if he doesn’t. I can still love him indirectly—can you?"

Nightingale raised an eyebrow provocatively.

"What does loving someone indirectly mean?"

Vampire Sister was once again stumped.

"Well, this~"

Nightingale wrapped her arm around Sea Girl’s waist.

"Wha—what? You, you’re too filthy! I’m not talking to you anymore."

Vampire Sister said angrily, puffing up in frustration.

"Stop dragging me into your ridiculous arguments."

Sea Girl said blankly.

"Oh, come on, you don’t actually want that? The other day, I saw you watching—mmph!"

Nightingale leaned close to Sea Girl’s ear with a mischievous grin, only to be silenced by a fishing rod shoved down her throat, stabbing straight into her stomach.

"Hahaha, serves you right for talking dirty! Fishmonger’s daughter, go sew her mouth shut—mmph!"

Vampire Sister, ready to gloat, ended up receiving the same treatment as Nightingale.

"Do they always cause this much commotion every day?"

Doctor Nile looked at Niu Daji.

"Huh? I wouldn’t know. I just got here."

Niu Daji replied cluelessly.

"I wasn’t asking you."

Doctor Nile waved him off, pensive.

Well, at least Sasha wouldn’t have to worry about being bored if she married into this crowd.

He’d seen plenty of arranged marriages, and often a woman’s treatment in her husband’s household depended heavily on her family’s status and her own standing within its hierarchy.

Sasha’s status with him was beyond question; his position, however, was considerably more awkward.

Even though a doctor in the Metropolis counted as middle class, it was no match for upper-class figures like the sewer’s poster child or powerful family patriarchs.

As for being a Priest of Ra? That identity was actually a downside in the Metropolis.

"Looks like I still need to work harder."

Doctor Nile was rarely filled with newfound determination.

Although he couldn’t outmatch those future fathers-in-law in terms of power, he could still outpace them in terms of effort.

And knowing Liu Zheng’s personality, the more he invested, the more he’d likely get in return.

Over on the other side, Liu Zheng and the French Plane Tree finally stopped bickering.

"Hurry up and hand it over. It’s super late—we still need sleep, even if you don’t."

He said irritably.

"Hmph, you troublesome animals! It’s clear that us plants are the superior lifeforms."

The French Plane Tree proclaimed proudly.

"Not much longer before you stop being a plant."

Liu Zheng scoffed.

Soon enough, not only would the French Plane Tree turn into an animal—it’d specifically become a bird.

"Hmph, we’ll see when the time comes."

The tree roots burst forth from the soil again, carefully cradling something that stretched towards Liu Zheng.

"Be careful—this is the only one. If it drops, it’s gone."

The French Plane Tree warned.

"What’s so damn precious about this thing?"

Liu Zheng looked at the item being passed to him.

It was a half-withered stalk of grass—its vibrant green side had four white lines and four facets, while the dried-out side was terribly frail, appearing ready to crumble at the slightest touch.

"Name: Half-Withered Divination Grass (One-time Use)"

"Type: Tool/Miscellaneous Item"

"Quality: Exquisite"

"Effect One: Upon use, randomly increases or decreases Luck Value for the entire instance. Item self-destructs after use."

"Effect Two: Enhances divination results when used as a divination tool."

"Notes: Left eye twitch means money, laugh haha; right eye twitch means disaster, go screw yourself."

"Can it be taken out of the instance: Yes"

"Happy now, you thieving human?"

The French Plane Tree grumbled.

"Hmm..."

Liu Zheng was genuinely unsure.

Luck was such an abstract concept, and accordingly, items that purported to boost Luck Value were difficult to appraise.

For instance, the Resentment Relics of the Black Carp Dragon he’d acquired from the sewer might be utterly worthless to most people, but to certain individuals, it was priceless.

"Ignorant human idiot. If you don’t want it, give it back."

The French Plane Tree said impatiently.

"Yeah, no. Like I said—once something’s in my hands, it’s not going back."

Liu Zheng immediately stored the Half-Withered Divination Grass in his System Space.

Based on his prior dealings with the French Plane Tree, it seemed relatively reliable.

Plus, having experienced the joys of maximum Luck Value once before, he could never have enough items that increased it.

"Hmph. Fine, we’re done. Now get out of here and stop disturbing my sleep."

The French Plane Tree began shooing him away.

"You’ve been sleeping all day, and you still want more?"

"What’s it to you? Go ahead and leave, or I’ll start yawning."

The French Plane Tree pretended it was about to release that green gas again.

"Alright, alright. Consider your mouth sufficiently noxious. You’re greedy, opportunistic, and ungrateful—guess you’ve already mastered those human traits, huh?"

Liu Zheng sneered and led the group away.

"Take the Fly-Men downstairs, let them gorge themselves on, uh, what they eat—and tonight, everyone’s sleeping in the sewer. Tomorrow morning, straight to work."

He said to Sea Girl.

"I’m not going."

Sea Girl refused, as expected.

"Fine. Then write this down: ’I, Sea Girl, do not require any assistance from Liu Zheng, and my personal safety and financial security are entirely unrelated to him. Anything that happens to me is my own responsibility.’ And then sign it."

Liu Zheng pulled out Snake-Man’s draft manuscript and flipped to a blank page.

"Why should I?"

Sea Girl wasn’t about to sign.

"Then why do you want to survive, yet refuse to follow my orders?"

He raised his voice.

"You saw what happened earlier—you three together couldn’t even match one enemy. If I hadn’t used my trump card, we’d all have been toast."

"If you want to die, fine! Go be someone’s Ming Fei or ritual tool, but don’t drag me down with you."

"Every day, I’m like a goddamn perpetual motion machine—never-ending tasks, all life-or-death critical. Why the hell do I need to waste time on your petty emotions?"

"One word: wanna live? Do as I say. Wanna die? Kill yourself right now—I’ll sell your corpse to a restaurant for some cash back."

Liu Zheng’s tone grew sharper, his words coming faster and faster, whipping Sea Girl’s body and mind like lashes.

Her body trembled violently, her skin flushed red from blood racing through it, her hands shifting rapidly between different fishing tools like she was performing magic tricks.

"You’re being too harsh!"

Sea Girl squeezed out the words through gritted teeth.

"Harsh? I can be even worse..."

Liu Zheng unleashed another barrage of vulgar insults, mixing real-world knowledge with a distinctly Metropolis flair.

Sea Girl’s emotions kept escalating higher and higher, until they finally snapped.

"Uh-oh!"

Nightingale exclaimed, watching Sea Girl’s body suddenly stop trembling, all her muscles tightening.

"What? Is she gonna blow?"

Guo Koutangzi raised his soup pot, ready to intervene.

"No, she’s gonna leak."

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