The world has turned into Hell's Game, why should I stay human?
Chapter 193 Gentlemen, I Like War

Chapter 193: Chapter 193 Gentlemen, I Like War

"Sure."

The security only said one word before hanging up the phone.

"Boss, help me call Big Brother."

Liu Zheng thought for a moment and said.

"So many damn things in one day."

Niu Ma dialed impatiently and threw the phone to him.

"Hello, Big Brother!"

Liu Zheng was still full of energy.

"Still so energetic, huh? However, why do I sense a murderous aura?"

Big White Goose said.

"You know Big Brother, planning to go and kill some bugs."

He replied with a smile.

"What kind of bugs?"

"The type that wears suits and ties."

Liu Zheng said.

"Oh, those kinds. I’ve tried them before, average taste but quite chewy. If it’s convenient, bring me back a couple of legs, I need to practice my bite."

Big White Goose said.

"No problem. Was Big Brother satisfied with the stuff I sent over?"

Though he didn’t know why a goose needed to practice its bite, he readily agreed.

"Hey, it was me who spoke out."

Niu Ma protested from the side.

"Quite tasty, much fresher than the fish I had before. That item the British Minister has already started using, he hasn’t come out yet."

Big White Goose replied.

"That’s good then, I’d like to ask Big Brother for another favor."

Liu Zheng said.

"Go ahead."

"Turn me into a clown, the clownier the better."

He said.

"Sure, when?"

"Right now."

"Then I’ll be right there."

Big White Goose hung up the phone.

Two minutes later, it knocked on the lounge door.

"I won’t come in, just bring a stool and sit at the door, I’ll do the makeup for you there."

It told Liu Zheng as he opened the door.

"Alright. Big Brother, want some coffee?"

He brought over the stool and also got a cup of Unlucky Coffee for Big White Goose.

"This tastes good. The delivery department is really convenient, got everything you need."

Big White Goose remarked.

"If Big Brother ever wants to join our delivery department, I wholeheartedly welcome you."

Liu Zheng immediately said.

"Hey, since when was it your call in the delivery department?"

Niu Ma continued to protest.

"Let’s forget it. I’m too old to be moving around. Besides, the terms here are tough indeed, not suitable for the elderly."

Big White Goose glanced around the lounge and said.

Niu Ma turned his head, pretending to hear nothing.

"Alright, sit down."

As told, Liu Zheng sat on the stool.

"What kind of clown do you want?"

Big White Goose asked.

"I don’t really know, you decide, Big Brother."

He said.

Since the system had given no definition of a clown, he might as well trust Big White Goose, the makeup expert.

"Alright then, I’ll give you an original doctrine clown."

Big White Goose thought for a moment, opened the suitcase by his feet, and took out a small jar.

Upon opening the jar, a strong smell of paint mixed with mold assaulted their senses.

"Lower your head."

As Liu Zheng lowered his head, Big White Goose dumped the entire jar over him.

The thick white liquid spilled out, miraculously without splattering elsewhere, perfectly covering his face without affecting his eyes, nose, or mouth.

"Stretch out your tentacles."

Big White Goose took a brush and brushed it over his tentacles, then stabbed through them.

Dark purple blood sprayed out instantaneously.

"Your blood isn’t red enough."

Big White Goose was not quite satisfied.

"Isn’t dark purple more sinister?"

"You’ve been watching clowns in those little movies, haven’t you?"

Big White Goose rolled its eyes.

"Ahahaha."

Liu Zheng chuckled.

"Fine, I’ll use mine."

Big White Goose said helplessly.

"Oh, how could I?"

"It’s good for an old one to shed some blood now and then."

As it spoke, Big White Goose plunged the brush into its own wing.

A splash of red appeared and soaked the brush tip slowly, dense like mercury.

Once the brush tip was thoroughly red, Big White Goose swung it firmly across his eyes, nose, and mouth.

"Now, for the grand finale."

Big White Goose took out a box from the suitcase and opened it to reveal two curved eyebrows wriggling like worms on the velvet pad.

Carefully using tweezers, Big White Goose placed the eyebrows above Liu Zheng’s, where they writhed and burrowed seamlessly into his flesh as if they had always been there.

But they continued to twist, making him look as if he was perpetually squinting and making faces, which was quite comical.

But this was presumably the effect Big White Goose was going for.

"Not bad, not bad."

Big White Goose said satisfactorily.

It had also done clown makeup for waitstaff in the past for the customers’ amusement.

But that was more than ten years ago. Revisiting the old craft, it turned out the seasoned hand had not lost its touch.

Liu Zheng took out the Lucky Clown Card, and the system prompt immediately sounded.

"’Lucky Clown Card’ has taken effect."

His mouth formed a deep, enigmatic smile.

"Young man, although I don’t know what you’re planning to do, it’s best not to act recklessly."

"The longer you live, the stronger you become, and the more you can achieve."

"With your talent, in a year or two, Niu Ma will be nothing but your lackey. In a dozen more years, climbing to even higher positions won’t be impossible."

"Liu was just too impatient, otherwise he wouldn’t necessarily have failed."

"Young man, you’ve seen his end, don’t follow in his footsteps."

Big White Goose spoke much faster than usual.

"A thousand years is too long, we only strive for the present."

Liu Zheng fell silent for a moment, then repeated what he had said to Red Ghost.

"Ah, I knew I couldn’t persuade you. Maybe it’s the temperament of humans who end up accomplishing things."

Big White Goose sighed.

"Niu Ma, you’ve been his boss for so long, why didn’t you influence him a little?"

It remarked jokingly to Niu Ma.

"What do you mean so long? I’ve only known this kid for six days."

Niu Ma couldn’t help but comment.

"Uh..."

Big White Goose choked for a moment.

"So it’s only been six days, I thought it had been several years. Oh well, you’re on your own."

It shook its head and then waddled away, shaking its tail as it went.

"Be careful with that old thing, I can’t see through it."

Niu Ma suddenly warned.

"No worries, boss, I only trust you anyway."

Liu Zheng said with a smile.

Though he didn’t fully trust him, just a bit more than others.

"If you sicken me again, I’ll flatten you."

Niu Ma shivered and said fiercely.

"Ha."

Liu Zheng didn’t tease it any further, instead, he took out the Skill Disc.

After glancing at the item description, he resolutely inserted the disc into his temple.

A brief pain later, the disc turned into a beam of white light and shot deep into Liu Zheng’s brain.

Countless blurry illusions flashed before his eyes, like a carousel lantern.

These were the skills stored in the disc, and he could only acquire one of them.

Liu Zheng closed his eyes and reached out.

All other illusions disappeared, except for the one he grasped which merged into his body.

"Acquired passive skill: Interrogation Master."

"Interrogation Master: Your interrogation effects will be greatly enhanced."

"This skill... truly a product of the Security Bureau."

From the skill effect, this skill didn’t directly help with his upcoming actions, but it could still come in handy.

But regardless, drawing a passive skill was already a big success.

"Knock knock."

As Liu Zheng was pondering, a pain shot through his shin.

He looked down to see Ghost Hand knocking on his shinbone with its knuckles.

Liu Zheng thought for a moment, moved his stool back, then closed the door of the lounge.

Sure enough, the next second Ghost Hand crawled in through the service door.

These bizarre residents, each more ritualistic than the last.

Liu Zheng watched speechlessly as it crawled to his feet, then prepared to leave after setting down the delivery order.

He stretched out a tentacle to pull it back, then took out a cup of coffee from the takeout box and handed it over.

Ghost Hand grew a mouth, then screwed up its face, seemingly disdainful.

"You’re lucky to have something to drink, don’t be so picky. Besides, it’s your own fault you’re not drinking alcohol."

Liu Zheng cursed inwardly, then pretended to take the coffee back.

Ghost Hand hurriedly clutched the cup and gulped it down.

Liu Zheng smiled and then fed it a few dried fish.

Well-fed and burped loudly, it crawled out of the lounge wobbily.

"Why do I feel like you almost raised it as a pet?"

Niu Ma couldn’t help but retort.

"I don’t have the means to keep such a high-class pet."

He denied while picking up the delivery order.

"Meal: One Fish Head Milkshake"

"Address: West River Center Block E, Floor 11."

"Customer: Chen Xiaoxue"

"Time limit: Two hours"

"Chen Xiaoxue..."

Liu Zheng murmured the name, then stuffed the delivery order into his pocket.

"Let’s go, boss."

He called out and got ready to hit the road.

"Hey!"

Niu Ma stopped him.

As Liu Zheng turned around, a black shadow smashed right into his forehead, making stars appear before his eyes.

He instinctively caught the falling shadow, which turned out to be the Memorial Medal.

"Hurry up and scram, don’t delay my rehab."

Niu Ma picked up an erotic magazine to read.

Liu Zheng said nothing, shoved the Memorial Medal into his pocket, and walked out of the lounge.

He packed the meal box into the Legendary Takeout Box and checked everything was in order.

He dialed the driver’s phone.

"I want to rent that tank," he said straightforwardly.

"Okay, do you need a crew as well?"

"I’ve found my own crew, four people, is that enough?"

Liu Zheng asked.

"Normal configuration is five people, but four will do. You can act as the gunner," the driver replied.

"Good. I also want those fartsy bombs you mentioned last time," he said.

"No problem, how many do you need?"

"All of them," Liu Zheng thought and then said.

"Twenty thousand per piece, eight in stock, are you sure?"

"Can you give a discount?"

One hundred sixty thousand, the purchase would nearly bankrupt him.

"I’ve already got Shedding Shells of the Weaver Mother, I can buy the special silk thread used for uniforms from its relatives."

Liu Zheng said.

"I can give you fifty percent off as though they were almost expired goods," the driver hesitated and then said.

"That’ll do," he sighed in relief.

Eighty thousand was still a lot but not bone-breaking.

"Do you have any more powerful weapons? I want them all."

"Who are you planning to go to war with?" the driver couldn’t help but ask.

"Kind of," Liu Zheng said.

"How many are there? A few dozen? Or a hundred?" he said uncertainly.

"In that case... I have something fun, want it?" the driver thought and then asked.

"How much?"

"No charge. Just write the kill count with the blood of your enemies on the tank’s armor."

The driver said.

"What does that do for you?" Liu Zheng asked, curious.

Could it be that the tank was the driver’s real form and this would enhance his power?

"Nothing," the driver replied.

"Then why?" Liu Zheng wondered.

"Because I love war,"

"Hahaha!!!" the driver burst into a maniacal laugh, like a tank engine running over its limit.

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