The Empty Box and Zeroth Maria
Book 3: Chapter 17

•Daiya Oomine, dead via slit carotid artery inflicted by Koudai Kamiuchi

Day 6 <C> Kazuki Hoshino’s Room

“C​h​o​O​S​E​_​w​H​o​_​y​o​u​_​w​o​U​L​D​_​l​i​k​E​_​t​o​_​h​a​V​e​_​a​_​P​r​i​v​a​t​e​_​M​e​e​t​i​n​g​_​w​i​T​h​.”

Noitan speaks to me, but I feel to powerless to move.

I couldn’t do anything. Maria and Yuri were both suffering, but I couldn’t even lift a finger to help them.

Yuri has been forced to pick Koudai Kamiuchi as her choice for her Private Meeting.

Even though she knows what’s going to happen to her, she has to pick him. I can only imagine the pain she must be going through…

“—Damn!!”

I bite down on my lip.

I should have been cleverer about this. Even if I couldn’t do anything earlier, if I had only given more thought to how dangerous Koudai Kamiuchi was beforehand, none of this would have happened.

Yeah, if I had just come up with some contingency when Yuri came crying to me because she was frightened of him, then things wouldn’t have come to this. This is what I get for underestimating Kingdom Royale and wasting our time.

…Still, that doesn’t mean we’re finished yet.

I’m about to press the button for YURI YANAGI when—

“You’ve only had Private Meetings with me three times.”

For some reason, Maria’s comment pops into my head.

…Why would I remember her saying that now? That has nothing to do with this. The best option here is obviously to do what I can for Yuri in her time of suffering.

I know Maria’s in danger, too. She’s also been coerced into choosing Koudai Kamiuchi.

In her case, though, it isn’t for the same reasons as Yuri; it’s an attempt to prevent us from conferring with each other. His ultimate goal is to survive, so he’s trying to crush any chances we might have of conspiring and coming up with a plan to beat him.

It’s possible he doesn’t even care about the owner anymore. Rather than finding and killing an owner we aren’t even sure exists, he’s instead focusing on winning Kingdom Royale.

Koudai Kamiuchi is the Knight. In order to win, he needs to kill the King and the Prince.

The King he needs dead is Iroha. The Prince is Yuri.

Maria is still in a safer position than the two of them. There’s no denying she’s in danger, but the level of the threat is markedly different.

That’s why—

That’s why I choose—Yuri Yanagi.

Day 6 <C> Private Meeting with Yuri Yanagi – Yuri Yanagi’s Room

Yuri embraces me tight as soon as I enter her room.

I’m sure she’s burying her face in my chest because she doesn’t want me to see her expression. I caught a glimpse of it as she ran up to me. It was hollow.

“……I didn’t want to die,” she says this in an empty voice, her face still pressed against me. “No matter what, I didn’t want to die. That’s why, so I…”

I wrap my arms around her hunched back, not wanting her to say any more.

“U-uuuuuuuu…”

She’s crying.

Yanagi is crying.

Yeah—could I be any more selfish?

Even now, when I need to show support to Yuri, all I can think about is Yanagi.

It’s just that she forced me into this situation so many times back then, listening to the sobs of a girl crying in my arms—

—and so that emotion I had no choice but to experience is playing tricks on me.

It’s as if those feelings I once held for Nana Yanagi are back.

Aw, those tears are soaking into her school uniform. What a waste.

I wish I could drink them.

“……”

I hate myself for entertaining such thoughts.

What the hell am I thinking? Didn’t I tell myself over and over that I would never do such a thing again?

No one else would ever allow me to do anything remotely like that. I can’t repeat that failed love.

I’m done—I’ll never become codependent on someone who doesn’t even care for me again.

But…

“I love you,” she says, her face still against my chest. “I love you. I love you, Kazuki. That’s why…I never wanted someone like him to do that to me.”

“—Oh.”

After “Nana Yanagi” disappeared, there was something I turned over and over in my mind, each and every day.

What if she had said she loved me?

If so, things would most likely have turned out completely different.

I knew it was a cowardly fantasy, an attempt to explain away my crime against her.

But even though I understood that, I still wanted to know.

I still wanted to know her hypothetical answer.

“……I love you……”

Yanagi says she loves me.

If I don’t betray her here, then I’m sure she’ll accept me. And if that would lead to a happy outcome, then would I—

—finally be free of that part of my past?

“…I’m sorry to be so sudden.”

She finally looks up at me. Her eyes are red from the tears, but they are no longer empty. They contain a firm resolve.

She steps away from me and sits on the bed. I sit next to her.

On this bed, Koudai Kamiuchi took Yuri and—

Before I can think any further, she puts her right hand on mine. I take her hand and squeeze it.

“…I…don’t want that to happen to me again…ever.”

“…I know.”

Her suffering is so apparent to me it hurts.

“…I— I’m going to say something horrible now. But please…don’t hate me for it.”

“I could never hate you.”

She speaks quietly, as if she’s truly worried I’ll hate her for what she’s about to say.

“Help me.”

“—That’s something horrible…?”

She whispers, “I want you to make helping me your top priority. Do you get what I mean?”

I’m still confused, so she keeps going, her eyes downcast.

“You’re the Revolutionary, aren’t you?”

…Oh, so that’s what she means. “Are you telling me to kill Koudai Kamiuchi?”

Yuri goes quiet as I put it outright.

“But killing him is—”

“I know!”

Yuri cuts me off with a yell. I’m startled by this uncharacteristically loud outburst from her, and she lowers her eyes awkwardly.

“I know… If there’s any other way, I want to try it. Killing him seems like an awful solution. But is there any way around it? Is there any other way to prevent that from happening to me again—to allow us all to survive? Or are you saying you still think there’s some way to persuade him?”

“That’s…”

I can’t say it. Even I know there’s no getting through to him at this point.

But is that really enough to warrant a subjective decision to end his life?

…There’s no way. No matter how hard I may find it to forgive him, how many reasons I can list to justify killing him, how much everyone says it’s the right thing to do, my life would change the instant I killed him.

And then, my normal life would be gone, never to return.

So I can’t do it.

I can’t do it, but—

“Don’t betray me.”

I…

I thought I was waiting for this chance for so long. I thought I was waiting all this time for the chance to fix the past.

The truth is that I already knew.

I knew the reason Nana Yanagi behaved that way wasn’t just because she wanted me to comfort her after her troubles with Toji.

She was truly hopeless as a person, but even she was at least aware that there was something twisted about the love she had for Toji. She wanted to do things over and have a proper relationship with someone else, I believe.

Unable to do anything about her feelings for Toji on her own, she had me lick up her tears. She stole my heart exactly according to her plans.

I think her methods were wrong.

But that doesn’t mean her feelings were false.

I knew what she wanted to do. I knew, and I pretended I didn’t.

After all, Toji was my best friend, and Yanagi was his girlfriend. That’s why I couldn’t even acknowledge I had feelings for her.

It was impossible for me to do what Yanagi hoped I would.

That doesn’t change the fact that I knew how she felt, though. It doesn’t change that I knew this yet still decided to ignore it. It doesn’t change that I abandoned her.

And so, in the end, the sin rests with me.

Yanagi closes her eyes, puffy from crying, and turns her lips toward me.

Nana Yanagi used to make a face like this.

I can’t pretend like I don’t notice any longer.

I have to respond to Yanagi’s feelings.

I take her shoulders in my hands. Her delicate frame jumps slightly. I close my eyes, bring my lips close to hers, and—

—No.

I open my eyes, not moving any closer.

The word was so sudden, and I’m not sure where it came from. I don’t know why I thought this way, either.

Still, that curt voice sounded exactly like hers.

Maria.

……That’s irresponsible of you, Maria. If it were you, what would you do?

I can curse her all I want in my mind, but that won’t change the outcome. I can no longer do what Yanagi wishes.

Yanagi is still waiting for our lips to touch. After some confusion, I kiss her on the cheek. She opens her eyes, seemingly satisfied with just that.

The kiss on her cheek tasted of tears.

Still, I wonder why?

Despite the taste, they do nothing to quench the thirst in my throat.