The Dragon Prince's Bride
Chapter 199. Help me find him.

Chapter 199: 199. Help me find him.

"How have you been fairing, my child?" Her father, King Gerald asked as they sat facing each other with both her hands being caressed in one of each of her parents hands over the table. Gerald’s eyes on her were weary and full of repentance. He looked as though he wished he could turn back time. Like he was hoping he could somehow change everything that had happened from the very beginning.

"I have been doing fine, father. And quit looking at me with those eyes, I have not been made to suffer. I’m being treated right." She said because she could easily guess what was going through her father’s head as he stared at her like that.

She was says ng that, but Gerald could not help but notice her complexion. She looked pale... And although she didn’t seem to have lost any weight, rather she looked more robust, still he felt like that was only because she was with child. If she had not been carrying a child in her womb, Gerald was almost certain she would be looking quite ghastly.

"Neriah," Her mother suddenly called, holding on to her hand even tightlier than before, "Thee first thing I want you to know is that we came here because we care about you and we are worried about you and because we will always love you no matter what you do, you will remain our child."

Neruah could already tell where her mother was going with this. They had heard about the news of Barak’s death and about her being the major suspect so they had come because they were worried. She understood their concerns for her, but somehow, it still hurt.

And it made her hate herself... because she realized that her lies and previous attempt at Barak’s life had been a major reason for distrust. It pained her that her parents did not trust her completely to not take the life of her own husband, but she could not blame them. After all she had done, even she would not believe herself.

"In the letter we received from you for the very first time since your arrival here, you stated that you no longer detest your husband and that you cherish—"

"I love him." Neriah interrupted her mother and as she said those words, she hoped she had the most sincere expression on her face. The kind that was able to display and lay bare the exact feelings she had in her heart. The true feelings that she could not deny, She hoped her voice and facial expression could show that.

"I realized too late, that I love him." She hoped her words didn’t sound like a lie because she really loved him. She truly did.

For long seconds, the room was silent. Erra and Gerald exchanged silent glances before returning their gaze to their child.

"Then," Erra spoke again, "You swear on that love, on the goddess, on me, on your father—" she paused and her eyes went a little lower to Neriah’s protruding stomach, "you swear on your unborn child that you did not kill your husband?"

At that point in time, a sudden rush of pain hit her and she almost burst into tears but withheld them as she nodded her head, "I swear on everything I hold dear, it was my fault, but I did not do it." She confessed those words again like she had been doing to everyone who asked this same question. "There was a time when I wished for nothing but his death, a time when I used to dream about him being lost forever but those days have passed. And I could never think of harming him in any way."

Lords, the more she was asked this question, and the more she was made to give the same response, the more she realized what a despicable life she had lived. A life so despicable that even her parents could not beat their chest and vouch for her. She had made such a life with her hands and she regretted it now.

"Then tell us my dear," Gerald squeezed her hand in his own, "tell us what happened, all you remember. We will help you in any and every way we can. So tell us everything."

And just as she had explained everything to her in-laws, she did the same with her parents. They deserved every bit of the truth, from the very beginning. She had no more reason to hide it from them, she no longer wished to protect Lyle. If anything, she wanted to send a knife into the man’s heart.

"I am so sorry." Neriah apologized once she finished explaining the whole thing to her parents. "I know how shameful I have acted, seeing another man even when I was married, and I know sorry will not be enough but it is all I can offer, so I am sorry mother, father, for bringing shame upon our kingdom."

"Your child?" Erra asked.

"’Tis my husband’s. I swear it." She didn’t falter, she looked straight in her mother’s eyes and said those words, "I never laid with Lyle." It was embarrassing to have to affirm this again and again but who cared about embarrassment when things were like this? "My husband is the only one. The child is his." She hoped and prayed they believed her. If nobody did, at least, she hoped her parents would believe her.

"I am really sorry I have shamed our family and—"

"You have changed." Erra suddenly interrupted her. "You are not who you used to be." She said and a smile slowly crawled to her face as she spoke."The child I knew was not one to apologize so easily but now without even asking for one from you, you have rendered an apology." Erra pointed out.

Gerald nodded, "Indeed, she has changed." He agreed. "Did love do this?" He asked with a warm smile and Neriah returned it with one of her own and some tears that she could not control.

"Maybe." She shrugged and her tears flowed down her face and dropped on her dress, she clicked her tongue and said in a heart-wrenching tone, "oh father I do love him, I did not know I could even accommodate him more or less fall in love with him and I do love him, I do." She confessed those words over and over again. Words she wished she had just told him that day without any grand drama like she had planned.

"I love him so very much to the point where I cannot keep going on like this without him. I love him to the point where I wonder if I should just die with my baby and go to him."

"Neriah—" Erra gasped as she looked at her pitiful daughter with so much sympathy.

"I love him so much it is driving me mad to think he was hurt because of my foolishness." She cried.

"I love him to the point of madness, so he cannot be dead. If he could do this to me, if he could make me this way, he cannot be dead. How can he do this to me and then go and die? He has to be alive somewhere." She cried so desperately.

"Help me find him father! I know you can, help me find Barak. I feel like I am losing my mind the more the days go by." She almost screamed. The tears kept pouring out as she explained her predicament. Erra and Gerald stared at their child with so much pain in their hearts. It was hard to believe that she was the same person they had known.

"You would think it would get better everyday but it gets worse every night! Every night I go to sleep alone, every morning I wake up alone, I feel like I would rather die than continue like this. I love him so much and I miss him so very much and it all just hurts so bad that I would rather choose death." She broke down and Erra walked to her side, enveloping her in her arms.

"I keep waiting and hoping that eventually he would appear one day, that he would walk through that door or even come in through the window, but he doesn’t show. I wait and wait and wait but he won’t come. I cannot take it anymore. I know this is all my fault and I know I am to blame but I still want him to return to me, is that such a hard request? Why won’t he come? Even our child longs for its father. Help me father, I think I am losing my mind, I’m talking to his portraits on the walls and listening for an answer. I am slowly going mad, so you have to help me. Help me find Barak, I beg you."

She was in so much pain and they could see it... This was not pretend, it was real. Her heart was suffering.

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