The Devil's Good Girl
Chapter 114: Many can’s, but one cannot.

Deep lines appeared between Fil’s brows as she glanced at Vincent. His entire body was trembling and his embrace was tight. She could feel the desperation and fear in his warmth, which she didn’t expect.

’Is he... crying?’she wondered, snapping her eyes, reviewing the Vincent she knew in the past years. ’He is crying...?’

Vincent buried his face in her shoulder, clasping her clothes tightly. His teeth were clenched, mustering his courage to say a word. But alas, nothing came out. All he could do for a moment was hold on to her as if afraid once he let go, she would be gone forever.

"Don’t leave me," he breathed out through gritted teeth after a full minute of silence. "I can’t and won’t move on if you do."

Fil glanced at him again, baffled. She tried to push him away, telling herself this was just an act. But alas, he clung to her as tightly as he could.

"Vincent."

"Please! Give me another chance! I’ll fix Valerie — no, I’ll discipline her!" he exclaimed. "Just give me a chance, Fil! I’ll show you she’ll be better!"

’What is going on?’she wondered. ’I thought he would try to harass me too, but not... beg me? But then again, isn’t this another form of harassment?’

Yet, Fil couldn’t do anything when he was like this. It wasn’t like she pitied him like magic or softened up. It was just a complete mystery. When Fil said nothing for the next minute, Vincent slowly released her. He held her hands, looking at her straight in the eye with tears in them.

"Please, hmm?" he forced a smile, cupping her cheek. "I know you’re angry at me. I screwed everything up and hurt your feelings. I’m not asking you to forgive me right now, just don’t... don’t close the door on me. Give me a chance to be better, fix everything, and do things right. Valerie won’t do this to you again, I promise."

A tear rolled down his cheek. "Just give me another chance, Fil."

Fil was rendered speechless, studying the look on his face. In the long years they were together, she had seen many sides of him. The good ones and the bad. But this was the first she had seen him so vulnerable.

It was as if... he was truly scared of losing her.

It was as if he loved her from the bottom of his heart.

It was as if she was the only one he could see, love, and admire.

This was the Vincent she loved, the man with a pure heart and intentions. Foolish and a little stubborn, but real.

But alas...

’I... don’t feel moved or satisfied,’ she thought. ’In fact, I don’t feel anything at all except disappointment.’

If he loved her, why did he have to lie to her? Why did he neglect her? Why did he have Marianne? If he truly loved her, then why did he let many things happen to her? Why did he let his friends take advantage of her? Why didn’t he protect this love? And if this love was pure and true, how come he never wanted to be in her world or even have a glimpse of it?

And then it hit her.

His love might be true, but it wasn’t the same love she sought or hoped.

’We were never on the same page, huh?’she thought, pressing her lips into a thin line. ’Or rather, we were on the same page once, but then, we’re now reading a different book. I guess decades of togetherness is plenty of time for us to change.’

And each of those changes, they unknowingly chose to do it separately. Instead of growing together, they chose the other way.

Her conscience was tugged a little at the sight of him. She wasn’t so heartless. Her heart might be full of anger and only sought revenge, but it was still the same heart as before.

"Go home," she whispered, brushing his hand from her cheek. "It’s late, Vin."

"Fil —"

"I’ll think about it," she said before he could give her the long speech. "I’m still angry at you and at your sister. What she did was her fault, so she’s the one who owed me an apology."

She paused as she took a deep breath and huffed it out. "Today was a long day for me and I’m tired. I want to rest and I’d appreciate it if you let me rest."

"Are we... okay now?"

"Did you hear what I said? We’re not okay, Vincent."

"I know." He smiled. "But you’re not closing the door on me, right?"

"Not yet." Fil raised her chin, looking at him squarely. "But I’m warning you. You better know you’re treading on eggshells. And there’s no guarantee I’d take you back."

"Okay!"

Fil furrowed her brows. "Did you hear what I said?"

"Yes!" he grinned. "I’m fine with it. At least, I know I still have a chance."

Vincent reached for her hand again, squeezing it mildly.

"Thank you, Fil." He smiled lovingly. "I’ll win your heart again."

*

*

*

Jackson rolled on the bed out of boredom. He could hear Vincent and Fil speaking earlier and it had been three minutes since he heard the door closed before silence. Yet, he didn’t come out. Laying flat on his back with his hands underneath his head, he stared at the ceiling quietly.

"Is that enough to make her heart soft?" he wondered. "Well, I didn’t see that coming too."

Jackson idled for a while before he mustered the energy to get out of bed. He marched outside, peeking through the gaps in case it was a bad time. His eyes immediately caught Fil sitting on the couch.

"This is scary," he mused, stepping out of the bedroom to join her in the living area. As soon as he sat down, he studied her side profile. "Don’t tell me you’ve forgiven him?"

"I loved him," Fil confessed, eyes cast down. "For a very long time, I loved him. Only him. I’ve looked at the future with him, have children with him, and imagined how those children will look with our genes combined. Would they have his eyes? Nose? Brow?"

"I don’t want to hear it," Jackson leaned back, arms crossed. "Thinking about what our kids will look like is much more realistic since we have an active sex life."

Fil smiled bitterly. "I loved him and the years I spent with him were no joke. He hurt me in a way no one else can. He can still hurt me and make me cry. He can still make me angry and wonder — sad and everything."

"He can still do a lot of things," she continued, facing Jackson squarely. "But there’s only one thing he cannot do, and that is to make me come back to him. That’s what I realized today, Jack."

’And also... I realized I’m starting to like you more than just a sexual partner,’were the words she withheld, knowing they were unnecessary. The thought brought a bitter smile to her face, looking away from him.

"Does that mean... I can now officially ask you for a date?"

Updated from fr𝒆ewebnov𝒆l.(c)om