Superstar's Development Diary
Chapter 235 - 236: I Want to See What the Sky Looks Like

Chapter 235: Chapter 236: I Want to See What the Sky Looks Like

The doctor thought for a moment and continued, "When her desire to die is very strong, anything can become a tool for her suicide, and she must be isolated from the other patients."

"It’s terrible, can we help her get transferred to another hospital?"

"No, the patient’s family has prepaid a large sum of money to the hospital, enough to cover her care here for a year, and later a specialized psychologist will come to counsel her."

"Why don’t her family come to visit her after the accident?"

"The patient’s parents have divorced and live abroad all year round, making it inconvenient to come back. They just asked a relative to handle the paperwork."

He Jinxia couldn’t help asking, "Head nurse, doctor, is depression really so terrifying?"

The doctor looked at her and said solemnly, "It’s not incurable, it can be treated, but it depends on whether she wants to come out of it. If she doesn’t, even the best medicine is useless."

As the other nurses came out, the doctor and head nurse did not continue their conversation, but told He Jinxia to keep to her shift and then left.

Today was the first day Tongtong’s symptoms erupted, and since Tongtong had been sedated and fell asleep, He Jinxia’s eyelids had been twitching continuously, and she always felt uneasy.

She thought about it and changed the room checks from every hour to every half hour, because of the incident in the afternoon, the other patients in the ward had already been transferred elsewhere.

The hospital still needed to specially clear out a room without windows, which would take some time, so it would not be until the day after tomorrow that Tongtong could be moved.

Each time He Jinxia passed by Tongtong’s hospital room, she felt a sense of oppression by seeing Tongtong asleep through the glass windows.

Is depression really so terrifying?

This was the first time He Jinxia felt that the role she had taken on was so heavy.

In the original script of "Eighteen Years Old Sky," there were five female leads, four of whom had children out of wedlock during their teenage years.

Some were due to irresponsible boyfriends, some were the result of one-night stands, and others, like Tongtong, were raped and accidentally got pregnant.

The only female lead who didn’t have a child had a past of being raped and suffered from severe depression. She struggled to control her emotions, trying to seamlessly blend into a normal, peaceful life.

But depression was ultimately a ticking time bomb. In countless late nights, a thought haunted the female lead, urging her to commit suicide to end her life.

When He Jinxia first read this part of the script, she categorized the female lead’s condition as a psychiatric illness, with no other reason than that some of the female lead’s behaviors in the script were quite... neurotic.

But now, He Jinxia lowered her eyes, recalling the way Tongtong acted during her episode today, and suddenly felt that the script’s portrayal might still be merciful.

"Xia Jinhe, it’s time to eat!" A nurse called He Jinxia by her alias, snapping He Jinxia back to reality, and she responded, then left.

What she didn’t see was that Tongtong, lying on the hospital bed, suddenly opened her eyes at that moment, her gaze cold and despairing, devoid of any vitality.

When He Jinxia carefully finished her dinner and came back after ensuring she was composed, she passed by the hospital room and casually glanced in, seeing Tongtong leaning against the hospital bed, her head turned away from her, looking out the window.

He Jinxia paused, pushed open the door, and walked in, softly saying, "Tongtong."

Tongtong did not pay attention to her.

He Jinxia could not help but continue walking forward, her voice growing slightly louder, "Tongtong!"

Only then did Tongtong emotionlessly turn her head to look at her, her face pale, and she said emotionlessly, "Sister, I want to eat."

He Jinxia was startled and hurriedly said, "Wait a moment, I’ll get your meal right now."

Once she left, Tongtong moved her body slightly, suddenly got out of bed, didn’t even put on her shoes, opened the door, looked around, and walked towards the stairs above.

Fortunately, the duty nurse on the third floor was quite diligent and saw Tongtong the moment she came up, quickly stopping her, "Tongtong, what are you doing? The floor is so cold; why aren’t you wearing shoes?"

Tongtong looked at her and said distantly, "I want to see what the sky looks like; I want to go to the rooftop."

Upon hearing this, the nurse inwardly exclaimed in alarm and hurriedly said, "It’s already nighttime, the sky won’t look nice. Tomorrow when the sun is out, the sky will be a clear blue with white clouds floating and birds flying. It will look even better then. How about I take you to see it tomorrow?"

Tongtong numbly nodded her head and let the nurse drag her back to her room.

When He Jinxia had just returned with the meal, she was pulled aside by the nurse and scolded, "How are you watching her? If I hadn’t been on the third floor to find her in time, she would have run up to the rooftop to seek death!"

He Jinxia was stunned, "Seek death?"

The nurse said, "Patients with depression are always very unstable; seeking death is very possible, and what else would she do on the rooftop in the middle of the night? I fear the most is that she might have gone there to jump off!"

He Jinxia felt a jolt in her heart and asked anxiously, "Is she all right then?"

The nurse rolled her eyes at her, "I’m here, aren’t I? I coaxed her back, but you need to keep a good eye on her. She couldn’t go to the rooftop today; what if she manages it tomorrow? If something happens to someone in the hospital, our whole hospital will be doomed!"

He Jinxia frowned tightly. In ancient times, she had endured and catered to all sorts of nobility just to survive, better to live on humbly than to die with honor. If, in ancient times, a woman lost her virginity and chose to hang herself, it would still be understandable.

But in modern times, with gender equality and open-mindedness, choosing to take one’s life over such matters seemed too much of a waste of life, wouldn’t it?

"Depression, is it really so terrifying that it makes one want to die every moment?" He Jinxia glanced at Tongtong on the hospital bed and couldn’t help but ask softly.

The nurse also glanced at Tongtong, sighed softly, "It’s not a matter of severity, but her heart is sick; we can’t control so much."

He Jinxia watched the nurse leaving, then turned her head to look at Tongtong again, a heavy look passing through her eyes.

That night, when He Jinxia was making her rounds, she saw something strange that shocked her.

Tongtong was standing on the floor at night, not sleeping, but standing with her back to her, looking at the scenery outside the window.

When He Jinxia saw this scene, two words flashed through her mind instantly—jump out?

She hurriedly made a call to the front desk, and the medical staff at the front desk quickly summoned one of the on-duty doctors.

Seeing this scene, the doctor’s expression became somber. He quietly pushed open the door and entered, his voice soft, "Tongtong, what are you doing?"