Superstar's Development Diary
Chapter 100: Intense Love, Resolute Hatred

Chapter 100: Chapter 100: Intense Love, Resolute Hatred

He Jinxia’s eyes flickered slightly, a thoughtful expression crossing her face.

The so-called initial burst of energy weakens at the second attempt and is exhausted at the third. It was rare for the actors to be gradually reaching their best form. As an experienced director, Gu Qiao should have kept shooting at this time, finishing these key scenes before resting.

Acting is the actor’s job. Out of respect for her profession, He Jinxia believed that Luo Sifang and Luo Dingxin wouldn’t mind having lunch a bit late. Yet, frustratingly, Gu Qiao called a halt.

Not to mention that resuming filming in the afternoon requires all actors to recalibrate their emotions anew. It’s uncertain if others could regain their state, but as for Qingwan, whom she portrayed, she was supposed to cry throughout the whole process—delicate scenes indeed challenging to perform.

If she were not familiar with ancient times or had not seen girls similar to Su Qingwan herself, she could not guarantee performing as well every time, managing to cry on demand.

He Jinxia took a deep breath, pulled out a white brocade handkerchief from her sleeve, and wiped the tears off her face.

Crying scenes were mentally draining for the actor; just crying for a dozen minutes made her feel utterly exhausted.

The film crew’s director was picking on details so obviously... He Jinxia sighed deeply, having already anticipated the high-pressure life that was to come.

The set workers quickly tidied up the props, and soon the area became much emptier. After waiting a while longer, the staff responsible for distributing the meals arrived, shouting out, and everyone instantly lined up to get their food.

He Jinxia looked around and saw Xiao Hua in the queue to get food. Just as she was about to head over, suddenly a voice deliberately lowered floated to her ears: "He Jinxia."

She paused, turning her head to look at Luo Dingxin standing beside her, and asked in confusion, "Did you just call me?"

Luo Dingxin hadn’t left; he was still immersed in the scene he had just played with He Jinxia. Every time he blinked, those tear-filled eyes appeared in his mind, impossible to dismiss.

His dark, clear pupils stared steadily at He Jinxia. Suddenly, he extended his hand and said, "Hello, nice to meet you for the first time. I am Luo Dingxin. Please guide me in the future."

He Jinxia blinked, thinking he had stopped her for some reason, but it turned out to be just a greeting.

Her eyes curved slightly, and she extended her hand to shake his, smiling, "Hello, nice to meet you for the first time. I am He Jinxia. Please guide me in the future."

When Luo Dingxin saw the smile on her face, he was momentarily dazed and said, "You really resemble Su Qingwan."

The smile on He Jinxia’s face slightly faded as she shook her head gently, "No, I am not like her."

Having spoken those words, Luo Dingxin regretted it immediately. Given his relationship with He Jinxia, they weren’t at a stage where they could discuss whether the actor matched the character. Hearing He Jinxia say this, he quickly corrected himself:

"Well, not quite alike, I just thought so because your temperament resembles hers, both appearing gentle, demure, and shy. But you are much stronger than her, very determined."

Luo Dingxin was clearly referring to her success in losing weight.

He Jinxia smiled and continued to shake her head, "Su Qingwan is also very strong. Because of her strength, she could bear being abandoned on her wedding night without fleeing back to her mother’s house nor choosing to divorce Ciming Jiayou. Instead, she chose to endure everything—the scorn of the outside world, the disdain of the Ciming family.

If she hadn’t accidentally come across those letters, knowing that Ciming Jiayou hadn’t gone to the border to escape but to search for Su Qingying, Qingwan would still have been enduring."

She tilted her head slightly, staring into the distance, and said softly, "I’m not like her at all; I can’t be as tolerant, nor can I be as resolute."

How deeply can someone love another?

Even though Ciming Jiayou’s heart wasn’t with Su Qingwan, leaving her to endure an empty marriage and widespread contempt and abuse, Qingwan still harbored hope.

She hoped that one day, Ciming Jiayou would return clad in triumphant armor, riding a fine horse, bearing a victory flag, and then he would say to her, "These years have been hard on you."

How deeply can one hate another?

When Su Qingwan found out that Ciming Jiayou had suddenly gone to the border battlefield not for the country or its people but for Su Qingying, all her love turned into hatred.

She hated how they could live freely while she had to live so humbly!

She hated them for abandoning their family and being ungrateful!

She hated her own cowardice and incompetence even more!

This overwhelming pressure drove Su Qingwan to a path of no return, ready to betray everything just to see those who wronged her dead!

She was fortunate yet unfortunate.

Lucky to be adopted by the affluent Su Family, without a worry about food or clothing from childhood, but unlucky because she could not overcome the hurdle of love.

"Jinxia, Jinxia!" not far away, Cheng Xiaohua’s voice called out. He Jinxia came back to her senses, gave Luo Dingxin a polite smile, and said, "I’m going to eat."

Luo Dingxin snapped out of it and hurriedly said, "Yeah, I’m also going to eat."

He watched He Jinxia’s retreating figure for a long while before turning and walking in another direction.

Being an aging second-tier actor, he had his own set of rules during filming. He wouldn’t eat the meals provided by the crew but would cook separately.

After a while, Luo Dingxin murmured to himself, "If I were Ciming Jiayou, I would definitely choose Su Qingwan."

Cheng Xiaohua arrived under a tree with her lunchbox, opened it, and frowned slightly.

He Jinxia, rolling up her ancient wide sleeves, sat down, stretched her neck to look at her lunchbox, and smiled wryly.

"Give me the chopsticks, you’re not hungry, but I am."

Cheng Xiaohua handed over the chopsticks reluctantly and said, "Jinxia, how about I get you a nicer takeout from outside? Although Film City is new, there are still some eateries around."

Said without a second thought, but He Jinxia, reflecting upon hear words, shook her head and said, "No need, this food is fine. Just go buy some fruit for me when you’re free."

He Jinxia took the lunchbox from Cheng Xiaohua, picking at the food and eating.

The crew’s catering really could not be considered good. Compared to those exquisite boxed meals, this meal looked utterly rustic, more rustic than farm food.

The vegetables weren’t even cut properly; just thrown into the pot and fried, resulting in huge pieces in the lunchbox.

The vegetables were one thing but the meat – a look at it, hmm, it was still goose meat, which seemed quite good, but would have been better if it hadn’t been covered in a thick layer of greasy fat.

They were generous with the portion of meat, but its presentation was hardly flattering.

The rice wasn’t plump and round either; it had been kept too long and had grown somewhat hard, with some yellow unhusked grains mixed in.