Sharing a Pavilion With You
Chapter 132: Lost Without You

Chapter 132: Lost Without You

[Suggested song for this Chapter – Lost Without You, Freya Ridings]

The dog was barking and jumping on strangers who dared to push up against his mistress.

Manni and Meili were being buffeted in the crush. Bai Li could just see their little heads in the depths of the crowd. Meili easily recognisable to him by the unusual hints of auburn in her long black hair, and the bunny hairpin he had gifted her yesterday.

He flicked his chin at Ju Rong and the man followed him into the crowd, which magically parted for the Commander and his First Lieutenant on their war horses.

A little clearing opened up, and at its centre stood Meili, Manni and Tricky.

The two women looked around, wide-eyed and frightened, wondering why so much space had suddenly appeared around them. Tricky rushed about the growing empty circle, glaring at the strangers who had been pushing them moments earlier.

"You’re not filling me with confidence about your ability to look after yourself while I’m away," Bai Li said dryly, and Meili and Manni looked up towards his voice where he stood above everyone on horseback, silhouetted by the sun so that his expression was impossible to see.

He trotted Rishi forward, scooping her into his saddle, while Ju Rong did the same for a blushing Manni.

The people in the crowd stared, awestruck to have the Commander and his Lieutenant up so close.

"It’s Wang Zhaojun and Commander Bai," someone called loudly. "They were at the Lantern Festival together too."

"Do you think they’re secretly engaged?" Meili heard another tactless voice.

So much for them keeping a low profile before Li left for the North, she thought ruefully.

Tricky gave a happy bark and trotted along beside Rishi, jumping up to nudge Bai Li’s foot for attention.

"Sorry Li," she said, red with embarrassment at having to be rescued from the crowd by the army’s Commander, no less...

"Well, it was definitely a memorable farewell," he said shaking his head affectionately.

The Emperor observed Commander Bai’s actions from the walls of the palace gatehouse, pleased to see he had rescued Meili, even if it was a very public declaration of the man’s feelings for the girl.

She was far too small to fare well in that situation with just that little maid in attendance. With Commander Bai heading out of the capital, he would have to place his own guards to keep an eye on her in the man’s absence.

Meili stuffed the helmet liner into Bai Li’s hands, where she noticed, with a flush of pleasure, that he was wearing the gloves she had made for him.

"I made this for you. To keep you warm in the northern chill," she told him.

His heart warmed as he took in the hand sewn item with his name embroidered on the hem.

"Thank you Mei Mei," his eyes crinkled affectionately. "I will get a lot of use from this."

She forgot her embarrassment as he called her by an intimate nickname for the first time, her heart squeezing in response.

"You’d better put me down now Li," she said sadly. "You’ve rescued me again, and I don’t want you to get in trouble with the Emperor for breaching protocol."

"I’m not concerned about that, but I don’t want to make things difficult for you when you return to serve him. I wish I could kiss you," he whispered wickedly in her ear.

She jumped at the sudden hot breath on her neck and the devilish tone to his voice.

"You definitely can’t do that, Li," she said with big eyes.

"Who’s going to stop me?" he growled.

She gulped.

"I’m teasing," he gave her a quick private smile. "Though I do wish I could kiss you. Somehow I can never get my fill of you, Mei Mei."

She smiled shyly at him. "Come back to me, A’Li," she blinked back tears.

He gently lifted her down, giving Tricky his much-deserved pat.

"I promise, Mei Mei. Wait for me."

"Always," she nodded.

Meili stood right where Bai Li had placed her, watching his retreating back until she could no longer see him, and brushing the tears from her eyes once again.

All of the kind Aunties in the crowd patted her gently as the women tried to comfort each other as they farewelled their loved ones leaving for War.

Such a horrible, empty, terrifying feeling for those left behind... thought Meili, who suddenly felt lost without her Li’s comforting presence.

-----------------

The Emperor read and re-read the memorial in front of him before slamming his fist into his desk in anger.

"Please calm your anger, Majesty," Feng Bao hastened over to him with concern.

"That wretched eldest son of mine," he growled to himself. "Ridiculous!" he muttered.

It appeared from the Prime Minister’s memorial that not only had the Crown Prince been the mastermind behind the theft from the treasury, but he had also been building a private army, the whereabouts of which was yet to be uncovered, despite the significant efforts of his son’s enemies.

What was the fool thinking? Did he think he could topple him from the throne while he was at the peak of his power? Couldn’t he just wait patiently for what would be his in the end?

He almost certainly couldn’t be resurrected from this debacle, even if he wanted to reinstate the boy.

He sighed deeply, putting his head in his hands.

"Prepare my horse, Bao. I’m going to visit the Empress," his voice was heavy.

The Emperor had pushed his horse to the limit on a ride which did him good as he let off steam, escaping the cloying atmosphere of the palace. Now, he stood before his wife’s tomb. He lit a handful of incense sticks and pushed them into the sand of the vessel that held the burning sticks.

"Ying’er," his voice was filled with sorrow, "I’m sorry. I’ve let you down greatly, and I’ve let A’Hao down too."

He called his eldest son by their childhood pet name for him.

"I haven’t done a good job raising him. Look what he’s gone and done? I’m sure you’ve seen it all. He’s stolen treasury silver and built up an army to topple his Emperor father.

I’m sorry Ying’er, I know how much you love him, but there’s nothing I can do to save him now.

But don’t worry too much, I will make sure he doesn’t lose his life, and he can continue to live a good life in his palace. He won’t want for anything, Ying’er, I promise you."