Runes • Rifles • Reincarnation
104. It Was Just A Prank

Jin Shu backed away.

The crazy woman across from him—wreathed in flickering purple lightning, now tinged with pink—hugged the rifle to her chest, squirming, her breaths coming out in heavy pants.

If he didn’t know any better, he’d assume she was an animal in heat.

…Actually.

Was she in heat? A shiver ran down his spine.

He took another step back.

Then another.

Until—

Thud!

He knocked into a stool, tripped, and landed flat on his ass.

For a moment, he just lay there, staring at the ceiling.

The hell is going on here…? Hello? Seeking assistance!

His main soul finally spoke up.

Uh… yeah, we got nothing.

Then, another voice.

“She seems to be displaying tendencies of the disposition known as masochism,” Nano interjected.

Jin Shu’s eyes snapped open.

“Huh?!” he blurted out loud.

A shadow fell over him.

He turned his head.

A face—framed by crackling purple lightning—hovered above him.

“What are you shouting about?” Liu Hua asked.

“N-Nothing… What… What do you want from me?” He gave her a wary look.

She said nothing. Just held out a hand.

Jin Shu hesitated, glancing between her face and her waiting palm.

Then, reluctantly, he took it.

She pulled him to his feet effortlessly, as if he weighed nothing at all.

“It was just a prank,” she said suddenly.

Jin Shu blinked. “What?”

“I knew it wouldn’t hurt you. I could tell it had no… uh… I don’t know what they’re called. The things that go in here.”

She tapped the rifle’s empty magazine slot.

“…Bullets?” he supplied, unsure whether to be relieved or even more unnerved.

“Yeah, that. Bewl-its.” She nodded sagely. “So, it was just a prank.”

Jin Shu stared at her.

She’s actually insane. Like really, truly insane.

“Also,” she continued, “I knew you had nothing to do with my sister getting hurt. Otherwise, I’d have just killed you outright, not brought you here.”

Jin Shu’s brain stalled for the second time in five minutes.

Then it restarted.

“Wait—what?!”

“I’d never actually kill you, though,” she added casually. “You’re Big Sis Mei’er’s son, after all.”

Jin Shu flinched.

What?!

“How did you—” He stopped himself. “No. Wait. I’m clearly a woman. How could I be someone’s son?”

Liu Hua blinked at him, as if he were the crazy one.

“You’re a man, though,” she said. “And the only man who’d be allowed in here is Big Sis Mei’er’s son… unless you aren’t?”

Her gaze sharpened.

Lightning crackled.

A chill crawled up Jin Shu’s spine.

He had a very strong feeling that if he said no, he’d actually die here for real.

“I… am,” he admitted. “But how did you know? I had a talisman, and I actually—well… not really, but basically—turned into a woman now!”

“You’re a woman now…? Huh?” Liu Hua tilted her head. “Wait…”

She closed her eyes.

A brief silence.

Then she reopened them. The deep purple, swirling with lightning vanished. Now, they were dark brown—almost black.

Her mouth dropped open. “Whoa!” she exclaimed. “You actually are a woman! And crazy pretty, too!”

Liu Hua suddenly grabbed Jin Shu by the shoulders and forcefully spun him around.

“Ah! What are you doing?!” he yelped, trying to twist back.

“Checking,” she said, a soft chuckle lacing her words.

Slap!

“Aaah!”

A high-pitched shriek escaped his mouth before he could stop it.

Jin Shu froze.

Liu Hua froze.

The air itself seemed to freeze.

He spun around, glaring daggers at her, one hand flying to cover his very sore backside.

“Why did you slap me?!”

She didn’t answer. Just stared at her own hand in contemplation. “…Bouncy. Nice.”

Then she looked up at him. Her eyes gleamed with mischief, lips curled into an evil grin. “How about the top?”

Jin Shu stepped back, immediately covering his chest.

“How’d you do it?” she asked, stepping forward menacingly.

“You! Step back, and I’ll tell you!”

“I’d rather feel them, then you tell me.”

She took another step.

He retreated until his back hit the wall.

Gulp.

Nowhere to run.

Nowhere to hide.

He braced himself for his inevitable fate when—

Wait… why don’t I just change back? …Oh. Right.

A flash of silver light swept over him. When it faded, he was back to normal.

“Haa…” He sighed in deep relief as he confirmed everything was back in its rightful place.

“Oh, boo! You went back.” Liu Hua stomped her foot in frustration.

“Alright, tell me now,” she demanded.

“It’s just a transformation technique.”

She scrunched her nose. “Ugh. Boring.”

Then she reached toward him.

Jin Shu flinched, covering his chest again.

Liu Hua blinked at him. “I’m not trying to molest you anymore…”

His eyes twitched. “So you knew you were molesting me?!”

“Duh.” She shrugged. “Now—bewl-its. Hand ‘em over.”

Jin Shu crossed his arms. “…I’d really rather not.”

Because knowing her, the next time she tested the rifle, he would be the target.

…Again. Prank or not.

“I’m not going to use it on you again. I promise,” Liu Hua said, her expression suddenly innocent.

Jin Shu narrowed his eyes. “No. I don’t believe you for one second.”

“I’ll give you compensation.”

He frowned. “…What compensation?”

If the reward was good enough, maybe he’d consider it. The cat was already out of the bag anyway. Worst case, he could just run to his mom and aunt for protection. The only reason he hadn’t already was to avoid causing trouble for them, but that ship had long since sailed.

“I’ll marry you. My sister too.”

Jin Shu’s mind blanked.

“…What?”

“What?” she asked back.

“What do you mean, you’ll marry me?”

“Well, you’re Big Sis Mei’er’s son, and she asked me to marry you.” Liu Hua shrugged. “I told her no then. Buuut we slept together already, so now we have to get married. Master said I have to marry the man I sleep with. And you didn’t even flinch when you saw my sister’s eyes and scars. Everyone else looks at her in disgust.”

She took a deep breath and declared, “So, we’re getting married.”

Jin Shu barely processed half of what she said. Mostly because she was speaking so fast.

“Okay, first of all—we didn’t sleep together. We just slept next to each other.”

“Yeah, so we slept together.” She nodded.

“No. We slept in the same room.”

“Yes.” Another nod.

Jin Shu blinked. Realization dawned on him.

“Do… do you not know what sex is?”

“No.” She shook her head. “What’s that?”

His mind went blank for a second.

“…Let’s skip that for now.” He exhaled. “More importantly. Why did you sleep next to me if you knew we’d have to get married afterward?!”

“Haha!” She laughed sheepishly, rubbing the back of her neck. “I forgot…”

“Sure, okay, you forgot.” Jin Shu nodded, deciding it wasn’t worth arguing. “However, I have two more questions. One: How is marrying you compensation if I’m forced into it? And two: Why is your sister thrown into the mix?”

“Is marrying me not compensation?” Liu Hua asked, sounding genuinely puzzled. “And my sister and I have to marry the same person. Obviously.”

“No, it’s not compensation, and it’s also not obvious.”

“Why not?”

“Why? Because I already have two women who’ve said they’re going to marry me, and a third I’d like to marry—who, by the way, only likes women. So my plate’s already full. And generally, sisters don’t marry the same man… I think?”

“So, you won’t marry us?”

“Correct.”

“Then I have to kill you.”

“…What?!”

Jin Shu felt like he was getting whiplash from all the back and forth.

“I can only marry the man I sleep with,” Liu Hua stated matter-of-factly. “And since you won’t marry me, I have to kill you.”

“How does that make any sense?!”

She shrugged. “It’s what Master said. If a man sleeps with me and refuses to marry me, I should kill him.”

Jin Shu stared at her, dumbfounded.

“…Nah. Screw this.”

He was done with this crazy woman.

Without a moment’s hesitation, he summoned a portal and jumped through.

Jin Shu had no idea which direction his Aunt Chen’s mountain was in, so he picked a random one and sprinted.

He was done with that psychotic woman. Honestly, he was just about done with this entire sect.

The thought of going home, shutting himself inside, and living life as a reclusive runesmith sounded very appealing right now.

Thanks to his Wind element, he could sense his surroundings outside the dimension he was currently in.

And then he sensed movement. 

Something was following him.

No… not something. Someone.

His stomach sank.

“Don’t tell me… she can track me through slipspace?”

That was a terrifying thought.

“No, there’s no way.”

To test it, he abruptly changed directions. Surely, she was just coincidentally moving in the same general area.

But she changed directions with him.

“…No… no, it seriously isn’t possible! It’s not her… yeah… yeah, it’s just someone else who just happens to be—”

He cut himself off, realizing how ridiculous he sounded.

“What the hell am I saying? Of course it’s her.”

There was no escaping her.

“…Then I’ll fight!”

Fortunately, he’d had the foresight to stash the weapons he’d crafted inside his storage earring before he leapt through the portal.

He reached into the spatial dimension of his earring, ready to arm himself—Then hesitated.

“Am I really going to fight her with something this deadly? What if I actually kill her?”

She is trying to kill you, his older soul pointed out.

“Yeah, but… it can be avoided. And honestly? It’s not that bad a deal…”

He grimaced.

“…Well, I’d rather not marry a woman who might twist my neck off at the drop of a pin, but I definitely don’t want to kill her.”

He slowed, thinking it over.

Liu Hua slowed as well.

He couldn’t see her, but he could feel her circling the area, even passing through the space where he would have been if he were in the real world.

For a brief moment, he wondered—

Was this how Ying perceived the world?

The thought made something in his chest tighten.

He couldn’t kill Liu Hua. Not when she had a younger sister who needed her.

He sighed, resigning himself.

Then opened a portal back outside.

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