Please get me out of this BL novel...I'm straight!
Chapter 200: ’Awkward Silence’

Chapter 200: ’Awkward Silence’

WRONG.

Florian was so wrong.

He had thought that settling in for the night would be easy. That exhaustion would simply take over, and sleep would claim him without issue. So, he had dusted off one of the old, creaky beds and lay down, carefully placing Azure beside him, hoping that the familiar warmth of the small creature would lull him into rest.

What he hadn’t expected?

Heinz—calm, quiet, completely unbothered—laying down on the bed right next to his.

They weren’t close, and yet, this was too close.

Florian swallowed hard. His skin prickled with unease, his heartbeat hammering against his ribs like a war drum. This... this felt too intimate. Too deliberate.

And worse? Heinz didn’t say a word.

Silence stretched between them like an invisible tether, fragile yet suffocating. Florian had always assumed he preferred Heinz’s silence over his usual sharp remarks, but this? This was unbearable.

The tension in the air thickened with each second that passed. He felt trapped beneath the weight of it, like a bird ensnared in a net, fluttering helplessly against the threads of his own panic.

It was awkward.

It was so awkward!

’I keep remembering that fucking dream!’ The dream that had haunted him, the one where Heinz was—

’AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!’ Florian was internally screaming, pressing his lips together to stop himself from making any sound. His entire body burned with the weight of unwanted memories, the intrusive thoughts clawing at the edges of his sanity.

He had to calm down. He had to.

A soft noise broke through his spiraling thoughts.

"Croo... croo..."

Florian blinked, his breath still uneven, turning his head slightly to see Azure nuzzling against his cheek. The tiny dragon’s scales were cool but comforting, the rhythmic sound of his little noises grounding.

’Is he comforting me?’

The realization made his chest ache. A small, trembling smile tugged at his lips as he stroked Azure absentmindedly. He wanted to speak to him, to whisper something reassuring, but—

Heinz was right there. Too close. Too silent. Too present.

Florian tensed again, pressing his face into his pillow. He wanted to groan, to let out some kind of frustration, but the presence beside him kept him locked in place, as if moving even an inch would shatter the fragile boundary between them.

Then—

"Florian."

His breath caught in his throat.

Heinz’s voice was quiet, but it carried weight. A slow, deliberate call, pulling at something deep inside Florian, something he didn’t want to acknowledge.

He froze, every muscle locking up.

’What should I do?’ Panic bloomed in his chest. ’Should I answer? Should I ignore him? Should I pretend I’m already asleep?’

"Are you awake?"

Nope. Absolutely not.

Florian immediately shut his eyes tighter, forcing his breathing to slow, trying to feign the deep, steady rhythm of sleep.

’He thinks I’m asleep.’

He clung to that thought like a lifeline because he didn’t want to talk to Heinz right now—especially not after that dream. Especially not when Heinz had called his name in that same tone.

That same tone.

"You’ve done so well, Florian. Just let it happen."

A sharp inhale slipped past his lips before he could stop it. His fingers curled into the fabric of his blanket, body going rigid. The words echoed in his head like a cruel whisper, one that felt too vivid to be just a dream.

That wasn’t him.

It hadn’t been his dream—at least, not his in the way that it should have been. It was the real Florian’s.

Or, at the very least, the remnants of the original Florian’s memories and emotions bleeding into his own.

The air felt too warm, his skin prickling as if something unseen was pressing down on him. He forced himself to focus on anything else—the feel of the blanket beneath his fingers, the soft weight of Azure beside him, the faint creak of the old wooden bed beneath them. But it wasn’t enough. The memories, real or not, clung to him like shadows, refusing to let go.

’I am sleeping. I am sleeping. I am sleeping.’ He chanted the words over and over in his mind, willing himself to believe them, willing his body to loosen up, to appear natural, to not give himself away.

Beside him, Heinz shifted.

Florian could tell—he just knew—Heinz had turned to face him. Even without looking, he could feel it, the weight of his gaze pressing against his back. It burned into him, as if Heinz could see straight through the act, straight through to the chaos whirling inside him.

He didn’t dare move. He barely even breathed.

Seconds stretched into an eternity, each one heavy with anticipation.

But Heinz didn’t say anything else.

And Florian, despite his racing thoughts, despite the suffocating tension—

Was slowly, against all odds, slipping into sleep for real.

The last thing he was aware of was the steady warmth of Azure curled up beside him, and the unmistakable feeling that Heinz was still watching him as the darkness of slumber finally took over.

’....’

’....’

’....’

"Heinz—oh, gods— more," Florian pleaded, his voice trembling with desperation. His hips rocked back, pushing Heinz’s fingers deeper, and Heinz could feel the way Florian’s body pulsed around him, slick and eager.

Heinz’s jaw tightened, his own breath hitching as he watched Florian’s face. The boy’s eyes were half-lidded, his cheeks flushed a deep red, and his lips parted in a silent cry.

"You’re doing so well," Heinz murmured.

Florian’s cock twitched as Heinz’s fingers brushed against that sensitive spot inside him, and a soft whimper escaped his lips. "Please— please—I need—I can’t—" His words were a jumbled mess, but Heinz understood.

Heinz hesitated for a moment, his eyes flickering down to Florian’s cock. It was hard and leaking, the tip glistening with precum.

The prince’s breath hitched, a choked moan escaping his lips as Heinz began to stroke him in time with the movements of his fingers.

Florian’s body jolted, his hips thrusting into Heinz’s hand as he let out a loud, desperate cry.

"Heinz— oh, fuck—that’s—"

"NO!"

Florian’s eyes flew open, his breath tearing from his lungs in short, ragged gasps. His body jerked upright as if yanked by invisible strings, heart hammering wildly against his ribs. Every muscle in him felt strung tight—wound so fiercely he thought he might snap in half.

Beside him, Azure startled awake with a panicked chirp, his tiny wings flaring as he scrambled closer, concern written in his every frantic movement. But Florian barely registered the little creature’s presence. His mind was a cacophony of scattered thoughts, his skin burning, every nerve alight with a feverish, unbearable awareness.

’Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.’

’That was even more vivid than last time!’

His hands clenched around the thin fabric of his blanket, his fingers curling into it with a desperation that did nothing to ground him. The heat crawling up his spine refused to dissipate, pooling low in his gut, heavy and thick and—

Oh, no.

His stomach dropped.

The mortifying ache between his legs finally registered, the hard press of arousal unmistakable against his sweat-dampened sheets. A sharp, horrified breath caught in his throat as realization crashed over him like a tidal wave.

’No, no, no. Please, no.’

His body had reacted. Again.

Shame roared through him, hot and suffocating, curling into every inch of his skin like fire licking at dry parchment. His breath came quicker, shallower. His pulse pounded in his ears, drowning out everything but the deafening humiliation crawling under his flesh.

He wanted to be sick. He wanted to tear the feeling out of himself, rip this disgusting, traitorous reaction from his body. His own fucking body had betrayed him—over that. Over him.

’This isn’t happening. This isn’t happening.’

His throat tightened. His fingers curled into fists, nails digging into his palms as if pain could force this away, as if he could just will himself to forget, to erase the shame pressing against his ribs.

No one could know.

’No one can ever fucking know.’

His hand shot up before he could think, fingers curling into a fist, ready to strike himself, to do something to break free of this suffocating, unbearable—

"Florian?"

He froze.

Oh. Oh, fuck.

The weight of reality came crashing down, heavy and merciless.

He wasn’t alone.

The bed shifted. The air around him changed.

Heinz.

Florian didn’t even have to look. He felt him—the steady, grounding presence just beside him. The warmth of his body still lingering between the sheets. The slow, deliberate movement as he pushed himself upright.

And Florian knew.

Heinz had woken up. Heinz had heard him. Heinz—the very subject of his nightmare, the reason his body was in turmoil—was right there, too close, too real.

The dim light painted shadows across his face, making his expression unreadable, but Florian didn’t need to see it to know. He could feel Heinz assessing him, the sharp edge of his gaze like a scalpel peeling back layers, exposing too much, seeing too much.

"What happened?"

His voice was calm, steady—but there was tension there, coiled just beneath the surface. The kind of tension that said he was paying attention. The kind that said he wouldn’t just let this go.

And worse?

He was going to move closer.

Florian knew it, could sense it in the subtle shift of Heinz’s weight, the quiet inhalation before a movement. His breath stilled. Panic surged, sharp and instinctual. Every muscle locked up, his body bracing as if against an oncoming strike. His mind screamed at him to stop, to breathe, to think, but his body had already made the choice for him.

The words tore out before he could stop them.

"Stay away!"

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