MATED TO THE SECRET ALPHA
Chapter 119: Mirian’s Awake

Chapter 119: Mirian’s Awake

"Because I’m not wrong."

"That again," she hissed.

He could see the frustration in her eyes, the desperation to understand him, to reach him. But Ryder knew he was right. He knew that his actions, his sacrifices, were necessary. And he was willing to stand by them, no matter the cost.

"You’re so convinced of that, aren’t you?" she whispered, her voice trembling. "Was that why you’ve been starving yourself of both food and sleep?"

She swallowed the hard lump at the back of her throat at the thick dark circles around his eyes, the paleness of his face, and his cracked lips. "Do you think this would make me feel sorry for you and lift your punishment?"

Reana couldn’t even summon the energy to be angry anymore. She was extremely sad and drained, her emotions exhausted from the constant turmoil Ryder had put her through.

All she felt now was a dull numbness, a sense of resignation that made her words sound flat and untrue.

Ryder’s gaze dropped, his shoulders sagging slightly, as if the weight of his actions was finally bearing down on him. "No," he whispered, his eyes searching hers, "I’m more worried about you."

He raised his hand, holding her chin as his thumb brushed her chapped lips, "You’ve also gone on a hunger strike, haven’t you?"

Reana’s eyes fluttered closed, her face tilting into his touch as a mix of emotions swirled inside her. She felt a pang of surprise that Ryder had noticed, a sense of vulnerability that he could see through her facade.

"Why are you doing this, Reana?" Ryder’s voice was soft, gentle, his eyes filled with a deep concern that made Reana’s heart ache. "Perhaps, I deserve this punishment but why are you hurting yourself?"

Reana didn’t know why either. She’d tried to eat, to pretend that Ryder didn’t exist, but she couldn’t. Every bite of food and every sip of water made her feel guilty.

She wanted him out of prison, but it would mean that she’d given in to his transgression against Hale.

Hale was innocent, he was kind and didn’t deserve to die like that, but Ryder killed him without remorse.

How could she condone that? Hale might be dead but how would his spirit feel knowing that the person who killed him was being shielded by her, his mate, walking around freely?

Then again, she’d promised to protect Ryder. She’d promised to preserve his smile, not to make him lose his smile like hers was lost... but now, she felt like she was the same person slowly wiping that smile from his face.

How could she not be sad?

"Then, why don’t you help me, Ryder?" she opened her eyes, locking gaze with him, Her eyes filled with deep pain that she’d not realized she’d been carrying.

Ryder’s expression faltered.

"Show genuine remorse for what you’ve done, go to Hale’s grave and apologize to him."

Ryder’s face crumpled, his eyes filling with deep sorrow. He couldn’t do it, otherwise he would have.

"Reana, I’m sorry," he whispered, his voice cracking with emotion, "but I can’t."

Reana squeezed her eyes shut, her chest heaving with annoyance and resignation. She had known it was a long shot, that Ryder’s pride and conviction would never allow him to apologize for something he believed in.

But a part of her had hoped, had wished that he would find it in himself to let go of his pride and believe.

The silence that followed was oppressive, heavy with unspoken words and unresolved emotions. When Reana finally opened her eyes, her pain was swallowed by a blank stare.

She stepped away from him, one step, two steps, before saying, her eyes never leaving Ryder’s face. "Then I’ll leave you to your punishment," she said, her voice cold, detached. "But know this, Ryder: I will not forget. I will not forgive you... if anything happens to you."

With that, she turned and walked away, leaving Ryder’s gaze trailing after her.

Ryder didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. His back leaned on the wall as he sighed. She wanted him to call off the hunger strike, to save himself, but not for the reasons he had hoped.

He sighed. A bitter smile tugging his lips.

...

Marcus entered the healer’s quarters, looking like he’d fought the whole world. He uncrossed the bag from his shoulders and handed it to the healer. "Is this it?"

Healer Dira was stunned at his appearance, but she had nothing to say to him, so she took the bag and looked through the contents, and her eyes widened. "Where did you get–"

"Are those the correct herbs?" He cut her off.

The healer nodded. These herbs were called the body regenerator, extremely rare and difficult to find. They had the power to heal even the most grievous of wounds. And because the monsters had no healing abilities, they guard these herbs with their lives.

Judging from Marcus’s appearance... Healer Dira choked. After these herbs went extinct in their territories and those of the neighboring territories, it was rumored that the herbs were still abundant in the monsters’ territories, but who would dare to go there?

Her gaze lingered on Marcus. It was finally clear to her where he got the herbs.

"Yes, these are the ones," she said, her voice filled with deep respect. "Are you injured? Do you want me to have a look?"

Marcus waved his hand, "focus on her," his gaze on Mirian’s peacefully sleeping face. "I hope she’ll wake up soon."

"Rest assured."

"Thank you," With that, Marcus left. He knew a thing or two about medicine, so he could take care of his own injuries.

...

The next day, Mirian woke up, feeling energetic, like she was not in a near death situation a few days ago.

One of healer Dira’s apprentice, Mirian’s friend, fed her the gist she missed, starting with how Zeta Marcus had thrown away his own life to get the body regeneration herbs from the monsters’ territory, and how the Luna had humiliated and stripped Xavier of his power and title because of her.

Mirian was astonished at first to hear that Luna Reana cared so much about her, but doubt soon crept in. Perhaps, it wasn’t because of her, but Xavier’s punishment for what he’d made her do, she thought.

But in actuality, Reana hadn’t punished Xavier yet for trying to harm her. She was in no mood to think of the best punishment for him. However, Reana knew that merely stripping him of his title and power was not enough punishment for trying to mess with her.

As Mirian walked out of the healer’s quarters, heading to the Luna’s quarters to show her gratitude, her mind was divided: Why did Zeta Marcus have to put his life in danger for her? They didn’t have such a relationship. In fact, they’d only crossed each other a few times and none of those times they’d said a word to each other.

Arriving at the Luna’s quarters, Mirian was stopped by warriors stationed outside the Luna’s residence.

"The Luna is not seeing anyone," they said.

She frowned. What was going on? Luna Reana had never done such a thing before. What did she miss while unconscious?

Mirian’s gossipy side kicked in, but it wasn’t her priority at the moment. She’d just woken up after so many days, and what Mirian needed right now was to take a good bath, eat, and then rest...while listening to gossip, of course.