I, The Villainess, Will Seduce All The Heroines Instead
Chapter 135: Setting Up Penelope With Clarina?...

Chapter 135: Setting Up Penelope With Clarina?...

Penelope stood at the training ground, twirling her sword with growing anxiety.

She had arrived early, uncharacteristically so, hair tied up in a messy braid, sleeves rolled up in anticipation.

Today was going to be different. Today, she would impress Clarina. Maybe even get a head pat. Or a half-smile. Or, dare she dream?... A compliment.

Her ears perked at the sound of approaching footsteps. She turned, expectant.

It wasn’t Clarina.

It was Verena.

Penelope deflated so hard she might as well have sunk into the dirt. "Oh. It’s you."

Verena arched a brow. "And hello to you too, sunshine."

Penelope scowled. "I thought Clarina was coming."

"Yes, well, Clarina had something called ’standards’ to attend to. Something about inspecting drills. Or maybe she’s just avoiding her one consistent source of head trauma," Verena said, placing a hand on her hip and surveying the scene. "Either way, lucky you. You get me."

"I’m doomed."

Verena’s eyes gleamed. "And here I was thinking you’d be happy to see me."

"I was hoping for sword training. Not sass training."

"Oh, but darling," Verena purred, stepping closer and poking Penelope in the shoulder with her fan, "swordplay is for impressing people. Sass? Sass is for survival."

Penelope muttered something under her breath about divine punishments and cursed Mondays.

[SYSTEM NOTICE: Friendship Event – "Operation Rizzarina"]

[Objective: Get back at the maids for mistreating Penelope!]

[Description: Get assistance in developing romantic proximity with Subject: Clarina. Verena must act as wingwoman. ]

[Failure to participate will result in severe Friendship Penalties, including but not limited to:]

[+50% Increase in Penelope Whining]

[Mandatory attendance at five (5) emotional breakdowns]

[Inability to skip future events tagged "Romantic Catastrophe"]

[Time: 1 Day]

What the hell?

Romantic Proximity with Clarina’? Oh this is delicious.

Penelope’s face immediately frowned at Verena’s usual behavior. "Sass for survival? Or is that just a weapon you have because of the elegance you lack?"

Verena doubled over in laughter.

"Shut up!"

"Tell me, Penny, do you lie awake at night thinking about her wrists?"

"I do NOT—! I mean—I don’t think about her wrists—what?!"

"It’s always the wrists. Strong swordswomen? Always the wrists."

Penelope covered her face with both hands. "This is a nightmare. I’m in hell. This is my punishment for pretending to train."

"Oh no no no," Verena said gleefully. "This is divine intervention. And I, your blessed guide, have been chosen to drag your pathetic pining carcass into Clarina’s emotionally-stunted arms."

"I don’t pine! I—I admire! From a distance! A respectable distance!"

"And now, per divine matchmaking decree," Verena clapped her hands together, "we reduce the distance. Starting now."

"Wait. Right now?"

Verena beamed. "Scenario One: Casual Encounter."

Before Penelope could make a break for it, Verena grabbed her firmly and tugged her along. She already knew exactly where Clarina was.

With a quick shove, she directed Penelope toward the side gate just as Clarina was arriving from classes.

Penelope immediately forgot how legs worked.

"Say hi," Verena whispered behind her.

"I can’t."

"You must."

"No—"

Verena jabbed her with her fan.

Penelope stumbled forward. "H-Hi Clarina!"

Clarina raised an eyebrow. "...Hello?"

Penelope froze. Smile locked. Words gone.

Verena leaned into her ear. "Tell her she looks battle-ready."

"That’s weird!"

"It’s flirtatious!"

"She’ll think I’m unwell!"

"She already thinks that."

But Penelope panicked, so what came out instead was, "You look like a person who fights people... really well."

"...Thank you?"

She didn’t waste a moment to turn around and flee.

Scenario Two occurred the next morning.

"Here," Verena said, slapping a picnic basket into Penelope’s arms. "You’re delivering this lunch to her. You’ll say, ’I made this with my own hands, and a little poison, so I hope you live.’ Very romantic."

"I’m not saying that!"

"Fine, just don’t stutter."

Penelope walked toward the archery range where Clarina stood polishing her blade. With trembling fingers, she held out the basket. "I made you this poison—I MEAN LUNCH."

Clarina stared at the basket.

Then stared at Penelope.

Then back at the basket.

"...Thank you?"

Penelope nodded like a bobblehead and fled again.

Verena sipped tea from behind a bush. "This is going so well."

Clarina had wandered into the library that afternoon, on a mission to find a specific training manual rumored to be tucked away in one of the dustier aisles. Verena had anticipated this perfectly.

She’d strategically stationed Penelope in aisle seven, third shelf, tucked behind a precarious tower of books and what little self-respect Penelope still clung to.

As Clarina rounded the corner, the plan unfolded exactly as Verena hoped.

Penelope, naturally, tripped spectacularly over her own feet, sending a cascade of five heavy tomes tumbling down directly at Clarina’s feet with an ominous thud.

The woman was shocked, then crouched to help Penelope gather the scattered books. Her expression was unreadable, but there was a softness in her eyes as she offered her hand.

Penelope, cheeks flaming a brilliant shade of crimson, stammered, "Y-You’re very... sword."

A long pause followed.

"Excuse me?"

"No! I mean—good with swords. I meant good with swords."

Verena couldn’t help but smirk. She silently awarded herself a modest 6 out of 10 for her matchmaking efforts so far.

The situation didn’t improve much after that. During one particularly brutal training drill, Penelope faceplanted so hard that Clarina had no choice but to stoically scoop her up like a sack of potatoes and carry her to the infirmary.

Penelope, of course, was utterly mortified.

Now, perched on a bench outside the infirmary, Penelope sat sulking, nursing her bruised pride — and maybe her ego — while Clarina disappeared inside, unreadable as ever.

Verena plopped down beside her. "So. Updates?"

Penelope groaned. "I want to die."

"Bold of you to assume the gods would let you."

"Everything I say to her sounds like I’ve been dropped on my head."

"Well," Verena said thoughtfully, "you are trying. That’s more than most."

Penelope looked up. "Do you think I have a chance?"

Verena gave her a long, searching glance. "Clarina’s colder than a nun in midwinter. But even she notices effort. And you’ve got the dumb determination of a kicked puppy. I’d say you’ve got about... 15%."

Penelope groaned again.

Verena smirked. "But with my help, we can bump that to 30. Maybe even 40 with some quality blackmail."

"I hate you."

"I live for your suffering."

Then Verena ruffled Penelope’s hair. "Come on, disaster. Let’s plan Scenario Four."

"...Does it involve more falling?"

"Oh no. This time, we aim higher. A public compliment. You’ll say Clarina’s arms are nice."

Penelope screamed while the other woman just laughed until tears fell.

***

Night had fallen again. The day had been a mess, and Penelope couldn’t quite tell if Verena genuinely wanted to help her or just help her improve enough to hold a conversation with the one person she might still have a chance of befriending.

Not that it mattered much; hardly anyone at this school wanted to be seen with her anymore.

"Practicing alone again...?" came a voice.Penelope turned and there stood Clarina.

"What are you doing here?"

"Verena said you’d be here..." Clarina stepped to the side of the arena, spotted the wooden swords, and pulled one out without ceremony.

"So you actually came?"

"Look," Clarina paused mid-step, her tone flat. "I don’t like you. I’m only here for m’lady. But whatever it is you’re after, I hope it isn’t anything... unpleasant."

"I see..."

It stung more than she expected. Truthfully, she didn’t know what she was doing or what she even wanted. Maybe she just felt a flicker of acceptance from Clarina.

Strange, really, how someone so rigid and loyal could seem almost open-minded. Almost.

It was... interesting.

Penelope had never really paid attention to others before.

Self-preservation came first, especially as a member of the Imperial Family.

Now, she was a disgrace, clinging to an ego too battered to protect. Clarina, on the other hand, didn’t seem to have an ounce of ego. She was a knight, through and through. Her sense of preservation was reserved entirely for others.

"Unpleasant?" Penelope let out a light laugh, casual as ever, as she lazily reached for her sword.She twirled it once, almost as if she were toying with the idea of using it, then, without warning, lunged forward with a sudden strike that sliced through the air, aiming straight for Clarina.

The knight barely had time to react. "?!" However, successfully managed to avoid it.

"Don’t be foolish. I’m here for one thing only," she said coolly, then resumed her assault.

Her strikes were still clumsy—unrefined—but there was a noticeable rhythm to them now. She lunged with a flicker of grace, then swept low in a surprising arc. She wasn’t entirely sure what she was doing.

Maybe it was irritation. Maybe it was ego. Maybe it was the sting of Clarina’s first assumption: unpleasant. That single word had cracked what pride she had left—and maybe that was a good thing.

"You’re being rather needy right now..." Clarina muttered, effortlessly parrying each swing.

"N-NEEDY?! HOW DARE Y—"

Her foot caught something. She stumbled forward.

And landed—right on top of Clarina.

"Bingo," Verena whispered from behind the wall, grinning.

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