I Might Have Fallen in Love With My Childhood Sweetheart
Chapter 213 - 205: Heartache

Chapter 213: Chapter 205: Heartache

Qingran loved fluffy little animals when she was young, but since her mother was allergic to animal fur, they couldn’t keep any pets at home.

At that time, Mommy Li felt she owed her daughter and would always bring back a lot of plush toys, but Qingran did not like lifeless toys. As she grew older, she would pretend to like them to comfort her mother’s regrets.

Until later, when Mommy Li passed away in an accident, there were no longer fluffy pets at home anymore, and this topic was even taboo in front of Mr. Li.

Though Mr. Li loved his wife dearly, he was also devoted to pampering his daughter; otherwise, he wouldn’t have placed a bunch of stray cats by the bushes near the old tree.

But bringing furry little animals into the house was a different matter in Mr. Li’s eyes.

No one at home wanted to erase the fact that Mrs. Li was no longer there.

Years ago, Xie Ying’an was still young and clueless about emotions and love, naturally unaware of the taboo in Qingran’s home.

That’s why today, he brought over the lop-eared rabbit that Qingran liked.

In just a few seconds, Qingran’s expression changed from delight to alarm. She hurriedly stood up, and the wooden chair made a piercing noise as it scraped against the marble, but she couldn’t care less at that moment.

She ran to Xie Ying’an and, unaware of his confusion, quickly pulled him outside, hoping Mr. Li hadn’t seen the little rabbit in Xie Ying’an’s arms.

As they left, she didn’t forget to say to Mr. Li: "Dad, I, I have something to do, I’ll be out for a while, don’t wait for me for breakfast."

She walked out the front door of the living room without hearing her father’s response.

Although Xie Ying’an did not understand Qingran’s intentions, he obediently followed her outside.

It wasn’t until they were outside the courtyard gate that Qingran let go of Xie Ying’an’s lapel. She looked dazedly at the lop-eared rabbit in his arms, slightly lost.

The accidental death of her mother was a scar for the Qingran family, a wound that could never heal, and they dared not to touch it lightly.

But they didn’t know that unintended touch could be deadly.

Xie Ying’an was very perceptive; he quickly realized the source of Qingran’s unease - it was because of the rabbit in his arms, which he thought looked terribly ugly.

He lifted the lop-eared rabbit by the neck, suspending it midair, and asked Qingran, "Don’t you like it?"

Qingran shook her head, glanced at the small rabbit kicking its legs pitifully in the air, and ultimately couldn’t resist taking it into her arms.

"Let’s go to your house!" Qingran said. "I probably can’t go back to mine now."

Seeing Qingran’s mood a bit down, Xie Ying’an tactfully did not pry further.

The morning sun was not yet intense, and the two walked side by side under the tree shade.

It wasn’t until they had walked a long way that Qingran looked down at the obedient little rabbit in her arms, her expression softened a bit, and then she slowly began, "We can’t have little animals at my home..."

Xie Ying’an’s hand by his side suddenly clenched tightly. He remembered clearly Qingran’s reaction yesterday when she saw the photo of this lop-eared rabbit. Although he did not see it, he could imagine from her joyful to mistakenly sent emotion icon how much she liked that terribly ugly rabbit.

In such moments, Xie Ying’an simply listened quietly, unwilling to interrupt Qingran’s sharing.

The words never spoken, the feelings kept hidden in her heart were slowly unveiled on this long path.

Her mother indeed couldn’t come into contact with animal fur due to her allergy, but young Qingran really did love little animals.

Between what was possible and what was not, someone in the family had to be sacrificed, so that person had to be little Qingran, after all, simple liking was not so important.

Those years, young Qingran was not without grievances. Why could others have their beloved pets while she could not?

Why didn’t others’ mothers have allergies to animal fur, and why was it specifically her own mother who did?

Later that year, I can’t remember how old she was, seven or eight?

It was also that time after school when little Qingran was invited to a classmate’s home that had several Huskies. Seeing those silly and adorable Huskies, Qingran was so happy that she even thought about living at her classmate’s home and not going back.

Later, she was picked up by her father. Her mother did not come with him, and Qingran will always remember her father’s expression at that time.

Her usually gentle father had only anger in his eyes at that moment.

He took little Qingran and did not even return home, but went straight to the mall to buy a new set of clothes, and made little Qingran change into them in the public restroom, throwing the clothes that might have caught animal fur into the trash can.

If it were just that, it might have been alright, but as it happened during the harsh winter, slow-dressing little Qingran unsurprisingly fell ill after returning home, and was sick all winter long.

The taste of bitter medicine was not at all pleasant, and since that time, little Qingran no longer showed any fondness for small animals.

Now, ten years have passed.

Qingran thought she really did not like these small animals anymore, after all, that year when she saw the stray cat her dad brought home, she felt indifferent.

But last night, when she saw the picture of the fluffy lop-eared rabbit, her long-suppressed affection surged out uncontrollably, even forgetting to remind Xie Ying’an that her home does not allow small animals - a significant matter.

Thus, when she saw Xie Ying’an bringing a little rabbit into her home just now, her reaction was so intense.

That kind of days when seeing medicine made her feel nauseous, she survived through life and death and never wanted to experience it again.

Wasn’t Mr. Li guilty at that time?

Of course, he was, but what had happened had happened; he knew his impulse and tried to make up for it with his daughter over the following years.

The morning sun was not yet high, the sunlight scattered through the colorful leaves on Qingran’s face, making her skin look almost translucent and pale. She spoke as if she was discussing someone else’s business, her face showing neither sadness nor joy at this moment.

On the contrary, Xie Ying’an’s expression was very solemn, and even the steps he took became heavier.

"I... I didn’t know about all this..." His hands hanging by his side unconsciously tightened and then loosened, and his low tone carried self-reproach: "To think that I’ve grown up with you since childhood and never knew these things."

Qingran wanted to pull out a smile to comfort him, and then thought about telling him how much better she felt after opening up to him today.

Yet in the end, she just opened her mouth and didn’t say a word.

Passing hurried pedestrians on the road, Xie Ying’an slowed his pace and moved closer to Qingran, and then moved even closer to quietly grab Qingran’s left hand.

Her hand being held passively also became a habit for Qingran.

"Don’t be sad," the young man said softly, glancing at her.

He blocked her path in front, suddenly grabbed Qingran’s hand, and placed it on his chest.

His deep black eyes were like a deep pool: "Seeing you sad, here... also feels very uncomfortable."

He slightly lowered his eyes, his expression filled with a sense of heartache.

He truly never forgets to express his feelings all the time.

Below the palm was a series of strong and powerful heartbeats, Qingran curled her fingers, wanting to withdraw her hand, but Xie Ying’an held it too tightly, and she could not pull it free.

Just as the atmosphere was becoming ambiguously unclear, the well-behaved lop-eared rabbit in Qingran’s arms suddenly jumped out, shattering this rare beautiful moment.

Qingran then forcefully withdrew her hand and turned her head to chase after the rabbit.

Xie Ying’an watched the rabbit hopping around on the ground, frowning and feeling a sense of headache.

Truly, the rabbit is both his making and his undoing.