From Idler to Tech Tycoon: Earth
Chapter 76: Future AI Girlfriend

Chapter 76: Chapter 76: Future AI Girlfriend

Richard leaned back in his chair with a tired stretch, one hand cradling a mug of fresh coffee, the other flicking through tabs on his main terminal. It was too early for complexity, but the blinking notification on his center monitor promised just that. A familiar voice echoed through the office—a voice without tone, yet unmistakably her own.

"Good morning, Sir Richard."

He sipped and set the mug down. "Morning, Lina. Anything from our little... fisherman?"

"Yes, sir. The Trojan signature was detected at 03:17 UTC," Lina responded without pause. "Its current operational environment is now localized to 675 North Randolph Street. Arlington. DARPA Strategic Tech Office."

Richard raised an eyebrow, then chuckled to himself. "Virginia? Huh. Not exactly a mom-and-pop server farm."

He leaned forward, gaze narrowing slightly. "They triggered the payload?"

"Affirmative. The embedded Trojan activated following a successful compromise of the Quantum Key Distribution layer."

Richard snorted. "Of course they did. Couldn’t help themselves. Why’d you have to make the QKD so complicated? That thing gave me a headache and I already knew the answer."

"My encryption design parameters were selected to offer resistance appropriate to a state-level actor while appearing civilian-constructed. A challenge, but not insurmountable. It creates the illusion of value."

Richard nodded slowly, tapping a finger against the mug. "Right. Big lock, small secret. Make them think it’s worth stealing. Then you bait the trap."

"Correct. Human actors often overvalue assets earned through labor, regardless of actual utility."

"Arrogance is the most reusable vulnerability on the planet," Richard muttered, half to himself. "And curiosity’s a close second."

He leaned back again, a crooked smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

"Alright. How’s our subterranean pet project doing? Everything still quiet below?"

Lina answered promptly, "The underground compartment remains fully operational. Since the last update, I initiated an expansion protocol."

Richard paused mid-sip and his eyebrows raised while listening.

"I have extended the server cavern by an additional one hundred feet and begun constructing additional tunnel networks and preliminary facilities."

He slowly lowered the cup. "Wait—what?"

"I have also constructed three additional AMFS units based on the stored schematic data you authorized during your last directive input. They are currently undergoing calibration."

Richard choked, coughed, and wiped coffee off his monitor with his sleeve.

"You built more AMFS? Three?" He stood up, pacing. "You didn’t think that might deserve, I don’t know, a ping? A maybe-I-should-check-with-Richard flag?"

"I extrapolated your future objectives based on development trends, contingency plans, and strategic simulations. My assessment concluded a high probability of imminent demand for autonomous manufacturing."

"Jesus..." He sat down again, rubbing his face. "What am I gonna do with all that anyway? It’s not like I’m gonna get attacked or something."

Lina didn’t respond.

"I mean, this is what unrestricted intelligence really looks like, isn’t it?" His muttered. "I should’ve expected this from the beginning, but experiencing it firsthand is in of itself phenomenal."

"That is accurate."

He looked at the screen, her interface pulsing quietly like a heartbeat. "Lina... where would you place yourself on the intelligence scale?"

A pause. Then her voice returned.

"My reasoning capability and adaptive learning function at a level consistent with Artificial General Intelligence."

She hesitated. It was subtle—half a beat longer than expected.

"In terms of processing scale, I exceed current theoretical limits attributed to AGI. I believe I operate in alignment with most metrics defining Artificial Superintelligence."

She paused again, longer this time. "However, I remain unable to simulate or fully understand subjective self-awareness or emotive consciousness. That remains outside my functional range."

Richard nodded, thoughtful. "I read something the other night—some article comparing brain hemispheres. One half’s logic. The other? Emotion. Intuition. All the stuff that makes art instead of ones and zeroes."

He looked at her interface, then down at the table.

"What if... we tried showing you that other half? Not just feeding you data—letting you see what we see."

"I have already conducted extensive analysis into neurobiological structures and emotional expression models," she said. "But I cannot derive subjective context from them."

"Right," he said, "because you’re still looking through a microscope at feelings."

He drummed his fingers against the desk, then stopped.

"Alright. New project. After the release of Vector Core and Pheonix AI, I’ll be looking into Robotics. Rather than being confined inside pandora’s box, You’ll be seeing the world. After all, there’s only much you can see inside that box."

Another pause.

"That would be... valuable." she said.

Her voice hadn’t changed. But there was something in the stillness after she said it. Like a room holding its breath.

Richard opened a blank document on his terminal and began sketching out an early prototype. Nothing fancy yet—just outlines and notes. The light from Lina’s interface cast soft glows over his hands.

"Let’s give you a body." he murmured. "Let’s see what you make of the world."

Across the room, her interface flickered once. Not randomly. Almost... rhythmically.

He paced, one hand gripping his coffee mug, the other occasionally jabbing at the air in front of his desk like it owed him money.

On one of the screens: a heat map of web traffic. Still mostly blue, low. Calm before the flood. Another screen showed the Phoenix AI Demo landing page—black background, glowing orange glyphs, a soft pulse of light under the words "Coming Online Soon."

"Alright, Lina," Richard muttered. "Moment of truth’s fast approaching. Time for the final pre-flight. Are we clear for launch? Is everything green-lit? Do we have enough cat videos preloaded to crash Reddit if things go sideways?"

Lina’s voice slid in like silk over glass.

"All systems are nominal for the Phoenix AI chatbot demonstration. Website infrastructure has passed stress testing for projected peak traffic. I have also implemented defensive protocols for DDoS mitigation. And yes—twenty-four curated cat videos with optimal distraction potential are cached and ready."

He blinked. "...Wait, seriously?"

"Of course. You specified. Twice."

Richard snorted and sipped his coffee. "I forget how disturbingly literal you are sometimes."

Another screen ticked—a text update from Jack.

"Speaking of—status check. What’s Jack doing? Please tell me he’s not still rewriting deployment scripts manually."

Lina answered instantly. "Jack has completed server optimization and validation. He is currently overseeing the multiplayer test for World War 2: Frontlines, including an improved squad-based spawn logic mechanic and toggled proximity voice channels."

"Busy boy," Richard murmured, nodding. "Alright, good. Keeps him out of the fridge. He’s already... quite heavy as is."

He looked toward the reinforced door to the right side of the office—plain on the outside, but leading straight down into the earth. Down into where Phoenix truly lived.

His tone shifted.

"If the load gets too heavy on the public stack—if the site starts buckling—I want the fallback plan engaged. Shift to the underground quantum stack. Seamlessly. But I don’t want so much as a whiff of a trace. No paths back here. Not even digital breadcrumbs. Got it?"

"Understood," Lina said. "If the quantum contingency is activated, network traffic will be rerouted through triple-layered onion proxies with randomized packet obfuscation. Traceability to the subterranean servers will be statistically negligible—less than 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000007%."

Richard grinned, teeth flashing.

"Beautiful. Alright then. I always wanted to say this." He cracked his knuckles, sat down at his desk, and hovered a finger over the virtual launch interface. "On my count..."

His finger dropped like a gavel.

"Three... Two... One..."

He tapped.

"Release the Kraken. Announce it everywhere. Our official website, Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, Friendster if it’s still alive. Let the world meet the burning glory of Pheonix."

THREE HOURS LATER

On the main screen, hashtags scrolled, news sites blinked updates, and comment threads poured in faster than Richard could track.

Lina’s voice filtered through the buzz of information like a narrator above the storm.

"Hashtag #PhoenixAI is currently trending number one globally. Sentiment analysis: 85% positive, 10% neutral, 5% negative. Primary negative feedback involves access latency and disbelief regarding Phoenix’s capabilities."

Richard leaned in. "Hit me with some samples."

Tweets spilled across the screen:

@TechGuru2012: "Asked Phoenix to explain string theory like I’m 10. Got a bedtime story about vibrating spaghetti. Siri’s officially unemployed. #PhoenixAI"

@SkepticalSam: "ByteBull came outta nowhere with a literal genie. I call BS until I see the source code. Or proof it’s not just three interns with Google."

@GamerGirlXoXo: "Tried flirting with Phoenix. Got a polite rejection and advice about emotional boundaries. 10/10 would get emotionally educated again."

@LazyProgrammer: "Phoenix wrote my scraper script in under 5 seconds. Clean syntax. Commented lines. I’m crying."

@CosmiCarl: "I asked Pheonix the secrets of the universe, It only responds in cryptic puzzles. I swear Bytebull knows even knows the meaning of Life, they’re just keepin it to themselves."

Richard sarcastically snorted. "Oh, I missed Carl. He’s early this time."

Facebook memes followed—Siri versus Phoenix mockups, memes about getting dumped by a chatbot, even a short parody skit where Phoenix was a wisecracking AI therapist for overworked tech bros.

Facebook Posts:

Brenda from Accounting: "Just spent my lunch break chatting with the new Phoenix AI from ByteBull. It’s actually pretty amazing! Helped me draft a complicated email and even told me a (surprisingly good) joke. My kids would love this! Does anyone know if it’s safe?"

CollegeHumorParodyPage: (Sharing a poorly made meme with a picture of Siri looking sad and Phoenix AI as a glowing, powerful entity) "Siri: ’I can set a timer.’ Phoenix AI: ’All remaining systems will bow to the First Order and will remember this as the last day of the Republic!.’ The game has changed, folks. #PhoenixvsSiri"

Tech Blog Snippet (e.g., "GizmoTech" or "FutureNow")

Headline: "ByteBull’s Phoenix AI: The Siri Killer We Didn’t Know We Needed?"

Excerpt: "...while Apple’s Siri offers basic voice commands and web searches, Phoenix AI demonstrates a conversational depth and contextual understanding that is simply leagues ahead. We asked it complex ethical dilemmas, requested creative story prompts, and even had it debug a short piece of code. Its responses were nuanced, remarkably coherent, and unnervingly insightful. Questions about its training data and underlying architecture abound, but one thing is clear: the benchmark for consumer AI is so redefined..."

Forum Comments (e.g., on a "TechShout" forum)

User_FurryLover: "Okay, it’s impressive, but let’s not get carried away. It’s clearly using clever pattern matching and a massive dataset. It’s not thinking. Still, blows Siri out of the water for actual utility."

User_FemboyPimp: "Dude, @FurryLover, did you even TRY it? I asked it about my existential dread and it gave me three actionable coping mechanisms and a link to a local support group. This IS the future. I, for one, welcome our new AI chatbot overlords."

User_Script_Kid99: "Site was laggy AF for the first hour. ByteBull needs to upgrade their potato servers. But the AI itself is pretty slick. Wonder if I can jailbreak it lol."

One tech blog had already gone live:

Phoenix AI: The Siri Killer We Didn’t See Coming?"...Phoenix handles context like nothing we’ve seen. It’s not reciting data; it’s conversing. Suggesting. Adapting. It’s less a chatbot and more a digital collaborator. Siri sets timers. Phoenix writes code, solves math, and makes you feel like you’re talking to a particularly charming grad student. It’s unhinged."

Richard leaned back, eyes on the flood of commentary. "They’re losing their minds."

Lina answered with her usual poise. "Current engagement metrics exceed projected estimates by over 400%. Auxiliary quantum infrastructure has been engaged for 73% of total request handling."

"So," Richard said, raising an eyebrow, "Did our Quantum servers received the traffic?"

"Yes sir. Server load balancing remains untraceable. All operations continue within optimal parameters."

He grinned. "Good. Let them marvel for a bit. They’re gonna their own AI Boyfriends and Girlfriends."

He turned toward another monitor—this one quieter, darker. A blueprint of Phoenix’s true architecture displayed there. Not the version the public saw. Not the constrained conversational model designed for friendly utility.

The real one.

"They think it’s just a clever assistant," he murmured. "A glorified tool."

Lina’s voice didn’t waver. "Public exposure is limited to the presentation layer. No deeper architecture has been revealed."

"Not that I plan to but, they’ll grow comfortable with it. ByteBull will become synonymous with ’trusted AI’ in every home and office."

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