Divinity Rescue Corps
78- Poppins On Duty

A pleasant warmth from the sun, and a gentle breeze played over us as we looked down on the town that definitely had a silly name and not a dirty one.

I had to wonder if Glumpdumpkin had somehow slid sideways, or if it was constantly in motion, see-sawing back and forth up and down. I mean, I’d seen mountains simply float over on top of other mountains. This could be like that.

Tara’s Slitherwind companion helped us find a more vavigable road, though the going wasn’t very slow as it was. The road had fewer ambush predators, so that was a plus. We joined a stream of people moving toward the town, though I use the word ‘people’ pretty loosely. None of them were humans.

There were all sorts of Nakamamon headed into town at Glumpdumpkin. Some of them were bipedal and appeared sentient, though the Bouldurr had been bipedal but barely capable of grooming itself.

It was kind of Seussian, to be honest. Some of the people-shaped Nakamamon radiated heat and flame, others were blobs of purple goop that sometimes stood upright on two feet in order to converse with their neighbors, or sometimes glommed into a huge purple mass with a whole bunch of pairs of eyes in there. We had flying creatures who hopped alongside the walkers or took flight to head up and down the line, we had lizard-like ones, we had ones made entirely of cloud, one that was twenty feet tall, and a few that appeared tall, broad and very hairy like Larelle.

Next, the amorphous ones. Some of these floated a little ways in the air, and were all kinds of shapes. One example of this was a floating ring of water droplets, each the size of a basketball. This pulsed with light when it… talked, or communicated anyhow, and the droplets slowly circulated in a counterclockwise direction.  Widdershins, as it would’ve been called in Discworld. No idea yet on whether these were multiple smaller Nakamamon, or one collection that made a single organism.

Another good example was the purple goop blob, though a really great one was one of those boogie trees. It had apparently uprooted itself and was walking around on four big thick legs that ended in several root-like toes. There were also a series of different bugs, like mantises and beetles and spiders.

Then there were the big quadrapeds like Muppin, but made of all kinds of different materials. A cloudy elephant-sized creature descended out of the sky and bounced off the road, only to go soaring back up and away from a bunch of others. It was trailed by some dozen of other smaller ones. Another example looked like an anteater, while another looked like a shark that had grown stumpy and cute little legs. Some were feathered beasts, and I couldn’t understand the need for feathers at all. They couldn’t fly…

“Chickens,” I told myself, and I got some funny looks.

I wasn’t yet good enough at Identify that I could just get them all. Identify required me to stop in place, concentrate, and get several good seconds of observation in before the UI window could pop up. I tried, because these creatures were so cool, but I didn’t want to lag behind the team.

Glumpdumpkin grew larger and larger until the two spires of rock towered overhead, and made the presence of buildings at the tips not just weird, but ludicrious. The angle of elevation was all wrong. It wasn’t possible in the slightest to walk up and out to those houses. Were they only available to the smaller bird people?

Nope. The distant, ant-sized creatures were navigating the town as though it was an ordinary activity. Nothing to see here, this is as normal as the nose on my face.

I shook my head to clear those kinds of thoughts. I’d been in an antigravity castle. I had literally flipped upside down upon crossing whatever threshold it was that turned one plane of gravity into another. It wasn’t difficult to believe that magic had formed this place, or deformed it, and then kept it like this… for however long it wanted.

I drifted over to Drat. “Okay, so the first problem is the overcrowding?”

“Definitely,” he said.

Glumpdumpkin was supposed to be a village. It had enough people streaming into it that it definitely qualified as a city, to say nothing of the residents of the place.

Nearing the place put us at the bottom of a swoosh-shaped village, looking up in either direction at a cacophony of sights, sounds, and individuals all coming and going.

“Holy moly,” Regina muttered.

“You can say that again,” I said.

“Holy moly,” she repeated.

“It’s a figure of speech,” I told her.

“Your mom’s a figure of speech,” she retorted.

***

Both my mother and father snorted.

“I like her,” my mom said. “Is she in the running to be my son’s wife one day?”

“Mom,” I warned, “definitely don’t do that.”

She elbowed my dad, as if to say, ‘look at how easy that was.’

“I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s the big hairy guard lady,” my dad said. “That’s a lot of woman.”

My mother giggled in response.

“I don’t know what’s happening right now, but I don’t like it!” I declared.

“We promise not to judge,” my mother said. “And we promise we’ll come visit you and your muscly wife in Inserting Woods.”

“Just be sure to give us plenty of gigantic, muscly, hairy grandchildren, okay?” my dad added.

I frowned. “You two would fit in with the administration over there.”

***

Chrysta swung over in front of us.

“You will be in danger if we continue forwards,” she said.

“I’m… sorry?”

“I feel the presence of danger ahead. Beyond this point lies danger.”

Now, it had been really easy to ignore Chrysta before this. I had Regina, Tara, Cinzy, and sometimes the twins to deal with, before Vellenia showed up and became my Nakamamon of choice for the purposes of sexual gratification.

I had made damn sure so far that both Larelle and Chrysta were work acquaintances, and that everything between us would be purely professional in nature.

But when Chrysta hovered directly in front of me like this, it was impossible to miss a few things. One, she was always nude. She hadn’t suffered one bit under the influence of the God of Apparel. She was lithe and slender, with a white body that ended in the midsection area. I had noticed that as the weather cooled, she seemed to become taller. Meaning that when it was colder out, I could see her crotch and the top half of her thighs before they faded out of visibility. Nothing lewd on her slim build, no visible genitalia or nipples, which was why she seemed like maybe she was wearing a bodysuit. She wasn’t.

Two, though I knew she could multiply the number of arms she had, she appeared at first glance to have only two.

Her hair likewise became transparent halfway down her back. Overall, she was visually striking, and if you hadn’t seen the proliferation of her arms, you might wonder how it was she ended up as a Guardian. Larelle made sense given her sheer bulk and size, but Chrysta looked like you could snap her in half over your knee like a dry twig, or melt her with a strong breath.

I knew better.

The air around us now was definitely cooler than it had been a second ago.

“Way to ruin the surprise,” Drat said conversationally.

I called a halt. “What kind of danger are we talking about?”

“It’s a special ability as a Guardian,” she said. “It goes off as a check, and offers me the ability to spend Tokens if I fail.”

“And?”

“It is beyond my ability to succeed, and requires more Tokens than I possess.”

“Can I help? I’ll lower the difficulty. Tell me what we’re working with.”

Chrysta’s eyes widened. “This is… an Ingenuity check.”

I nodded. “Perfect.”

Right on cue, the UI message appeared in my vision.

Assistance: Your team member is attempting a check. Your ability Hard at Work will allow you to lower the difficulty by 1 for every 2 Tokens spent. Do you wish to assist Chrysta in determining the source of danger in the surrounding area?

Total Tokens: 8 Ingenuity, 1 Free Token

I gave my mental assent and flicked the number up to 6 Tokens. I didn’t want to lose them, but I had Meditation now, and that meant I could spend some hours every day attempting to get them back. I was down quite a lot of Tokens, but I was only 3 levels away from a full Replenishing as a Healer.

This should work.

Chrysta’s eyes were still wide, and she nodded her thanks. A few seconds later, a red haze flooded my vision, showing me that the whole area before me was dangerous. That didn’t make a lot of sense, seeing as Nakamamon of all types were marching confidently into that cloud. They were clearly ignorant of the danger.

The cloud definitely appeared thicker and more dense the further you went into it.

“What’s happening?” Tara asked.

Instead of telling her what I saw, I was curious to know what she was looking at, and asked.

“A whole lot of Nakamamon walking right into town.”

“No fights breaking out, nothing horrible happening?”

“I mean we’re looking at the same thing,” she said. “The huge purple goop monster that I’m calling Sneeples just broke into a bunch of humanoid bipedal peoples, and they split up in different directions… wait, one of them just laid down on the ground. That’s weird. Sneeples, what are you doing? A couple of other ones are just laying down. Some of them walk further than others I guess. A lot of creatures in there are laying down in the middle of the street… I guess they’re tired? Why are you asking me? You’re seeing the same thing I am, although if you’re asking me that means you’re not seeing the same thing I am. So… you’re seeing something I’m not?”

I smiled. “Big cloud of danger,” I said. Okay, the thickening of the cloud as they got further into town now made sense. Whatever was happening to them was stronger, and more likely to make them ‘lay down’ the further in they went.

“Is Sneeples… dead?” I asked.

“I’ve never seen a dead Sneeples,” she said.

“Fair point.”

“But I don’t think so.”

I called a huddle and explained what Chrysta and I had experienced. She had the ability, so I invited her to explain what she was talking about, but she only looked vaguely embarrassed. Leave it to an ice ghost protector lady to suddenly get stage fright.

“You misunderstand… It is not that I am unable to speak,” she said. “This is not something I have encountered before. I do not understand exactly what I behold.”

“Ah,” I said. “Anyway I’m going to go in there and investigate a little, and come back. It’s almost certainly a divine problem, based on what we’ve seen before. I don’t have the Durability Tokens to give everyone resistance to the effect. If you’ve been pumping up your Divine Resistance skill, great. I think we’ll make it a priority to level it up every time you level up your class, so we can be ready for more of this—” I waved my hand vaguely at the town, where a lot of creatures were sprawled out in the streets. “—in the future.”

“That’s… you’re the only Healer,” Isabelle protested. “You’re taking someone with you.”

All four Guardians immediately volunteered to come with me.

“Now, I have 2 Durability Tokens,” I told them. “Meaning either I can go in and then gain a measure of resistance over that damage forever, or I can lend that resistance to one other.”

Healer’s Resistance II

(Special Ability, Uncommon, active)

I- You may spend a Durability Token to resist damage from any source. Long term effects are reduced by 75%. Onsets of all diseases, venoms, poisons, or other afflictions are tripled, as are intervals. Lasts one day.

You may spend an Ingenuity Token to gift this ability to a willing target for one day.

II- You may spend a Durability Token after taking damage from any source. You gain a percentage of Resistance to that source permanently.

This was a lie… I could gift the resistance to another for the low, low cost of an Ingenuity Token. Of which I now had only one remaining. I agreed to take Chrysta with me.

“This time,” I told the others.

“I have damage resistances anyway,” Ivy said, and Larelle nodded in agreement. They all had Stalwart or something like it. They persisted, but I shut them down. This was highly likely to be divine in nature. If that ended up being the case, I would have to treat everyone who entered every day using abilities and finite resources. And abilities meant Tokens, another finite resource. They grudgingly agreed after this, and their apprehension watching the two of us enter was touching.

The most ardent member who wanted to accompany me was Fairy Poppins. I had a long talk with her, telling her I couldn’t justify the expense, and that I would be safe. Of course, I still couldn’t understand her strange language or tiny voice, but I sure did try. In the end I wasn’t sure whether she didn’t want me to go, or if she was concerned Cinzy might be in the invisible red damage cloud.

“I need you to do something,” I tried. This had worked with Brayden occasionally.

She stopped buzzing in front of my head and instead hovered in place, waiting for me to continue.

“My bond Nakamamon and my team are here. They could use someone to watch the perimeter and alert them if there’s anything strange trying to get at them.”

Fairy Poppins listened intently.

“There are a lot of strangers around here, and,” I leaned in close, “Drat told me there might be some bad humans nearby. I would appreciate it a lot if everybody was safe and sound when I came back… can you help?”

She nodded furiously and flew off to start her new job as perimeter watch. For my part, I breathed out a sigh of relief. I couldn’t see spending the Tokens to protect Fairy Poppins when I wasn’t even sure why she remained behind without her bond.

That done, I spent the Durability Token to protect myself and another Ingenuity Token on Chrysta. Now, usually when I spent Tokens, they would appear from around chest high, twisting around in the air with a video game coin sound—cla-cling!—before vanishing into a shower of multi-colored sparkles. When I used them on Healer’s Resistance, the sparkles went a pure clinic blue, and formed a dome around me. That dome shimmered and made a clean, sharp sound, a tinkle of scalpel that had been sanitized. And in we went

Here’s what we found on entering:

People—Nakamamon, be they sentient or animalistic pets—lay everywhere. I had to step lightly over them on any number of occasions, and walk around the bigger ones on others. Some of the residents of the gigantic town were still up and about, a few of them going about their lives not sure what had happened to the prone ones, and others milling about in a daze.

The red damage haze was pervasive, penetrating through walls and buildings. The Diagnosis check, which I failed, would have required me to spend more Ingenuity Tokens than I had. I wasn’t upset at spending 6 Tokens to help Chrysta with her work, but I wasn’t pleased at not having the resources to figure out what was going on.

You do not currently have enough Tokens to automatically pass this check came the window’s response once, and twice before I told it I didn’t want to try again.

We’d need more information to make the check difficulty any easier. Or more Tokens.

Level 20 couldn’t arrive fast enough, I told myself quietly.

In some of the buildings, Nakamamon worked at their jobs, unaware of the red cloud of damage all around them.

You have resisted contracting a mental ailment for now, the UI let me know. The chance of infection will be based on your successes on a Divine Resistance check using Ingenuity, modified by Healer’s Resistance.

Chrysta had received the same notification, which was useful information. The system periodically made the checks, let me know I’d passed, and that the next onset check would come in x period of time. When I first passed, the next onset check was scheduled for 12 hours from now.

“Twelve hours?” I asked. Chrysta affirmed this.

Creatures with lower Ingenuity who had failed this check were compelled to lay down, while some Nakamamon continued with their lives, only disconcerted at the sorry state of the streets.

“Excuse me,” I asked a large metal creature. Identify told me it was called an Alloyum, a golem made of a mixture of metals.

The hulking, no-necked metal person ignored me.

“Can I ask you when all this started?” I tried anyway.

Nothing.

You’ll not get anything from that big lug, a voice said from behind me. Or rather, a voice in my mind indicated that the direction of the owner, and the direction I was supplied was behind me. Confusing, I know.

We turned to behold what I can only describe was a yogi version of a Nakamamon: thin, stoic demeanor, purple gem embedded in the middle of the forehead, flowing pants tied with a thin cord, and a gauzy top not really restraining a full bust. Nor was it covering up the view of her boobs. Oh, plenty of jewelry too: many gold rings on the skinny neck, bangles on the wrists, ankles, and a gold and gem encrusted sort of waist necklace.

Also she floated in place with legs crossed, and fingers in what I’d think of as a meditation pose. Like Chrysta, she had a number of extra arms, and all of them were in different meditative gestures.

This is Christopher hoping we were about to get some answers.