Cultivation starts with picking up attributes
Chapter 86: Ch-86: Chick of Celestial Calamity

Chapter 86: Ch-86: Chick of Celestial Calamity

The elders were confused. One of them looked directly at Tian Shen and asked.

"What is your tamed beast trying to say?"

"S-she, she’s hungry."

Tian Shen answered the elders while inwardly grumbling to the little fox.

’Can you please not bully me like this!?’

The elders, though still dubiuos, didn’t dwell on it.

A few elders muttered confused things about Cultivation techniques deviation, while others just frowned.

Tian Shen, meanwhile, gave her the most helpless look he could manage without weeping.

Inside his sleeve, the chick—Drowsy—was now fast asleep, a tiny golden halo forming over its head as it sleeped.

He tightened his sleeve discreetly and stood up straighter.

Elder Hui scowled.

"Even if your arrays fail, the divine tribulation was no illusion. Maybe—maybe Something descended from the heavens."

"And yet we can detect no spiritual creature, no divine inheritance, not even a trace of a summoning circle."

Elder Su added, her hair bristling in irritation, staring at Tian Shen, it was as if she was trying to strip the truth from his bones.

Then... she exhaled.

"Very well."

The courtyard collectively inhaled.

She turned to the other elders.

"There is no current proof of violation or threat. The phenomenon may have been... a localized anomaly."

Elder Hui coughed.

"An anomaly that brings up thunder tribulation?"

He muttered.

"...A coincidence, perhaps."

Elder Su snapped.

She cast one last piercing glance at Tian Shen.

"But we’ll be watching you."

With that, she flicked her sleeves and turned away.

One by one, the elders followed, most of them still mumbling in confusion, theories already forming in their minds about divine, karmic interference.

As the last elder vanished into the clouds, Tian Shen collapsed onto the courtyard bench, sighing.

"Why is my life like this...?"

Feng Yin sat beside him, a subtle smile on her lips.

"Because you invite chaos. Like a magnet."

Little Mei dropped down beside him in her fox form, tail curling around her ankles.

"That was fun. Want a next part?"

"No!"

Tian Shen said quickly.

Drowsy stirred in his sleeve, let out a drowsy "peep," and nestled deeper into his inner robe like a royal brat settling into silk pillows.

Feng Yin leaned in and whispered.

"You’ll need to feed it something divine soon. Or it might start summoning more tribulations in its sleep."

Tian Shen’s soul left his body.

Little Mei snorted.

"I vote we raise it as our sect mascot. Name the next courtyard ’Chicken Heaven Pavilion.’"

Tian Shen muttered.

"I just want a normal life."

"Too late," they both said in unison.

...

There was no other word for it. The young cultivator sat in the shade of the courtyard’s ancient pear tree, a tray of spiritual fruits beside him, and a cup of cheap tea gone cold. His face was the picture of melancholy.

The problem? A certain divine troublemaker snoring inside his robe, radiating golden sparkles every few minutes like a heavenly disco ball.

"Normal life, huh?"

Feng Yin teased, sitting across from him and plucking a plum from the tray.

He glanced towards her, face twitching.

"What?"

"She’s kind of ticklish."

Little Mei leaned over the table, her fox ears flicking.

"Then, Can I cuddle her?"

"No!"

Feng Yin giggled.

"I warned you. It’s either divine milk or tribulation tantrums."

Tian Shen groaned, rubbing his face.

"Where the hell do I find divine milk?"

Little Mei tilted her head.

"Heavenly cow?"

"I can’t locate."

"Earth Milk?"

"Too expensive."

"Phoenix breast?"

Tian Shen looked horrified.

"You want me to die?! Plus she’s not a phoenix!!"

"Then, how about mine?"

He almost choked at that, with disbelieving eyes, he stared at her.

Little Mei smirked and flicked her tail.

"I’m just kidding. Don’t be such a prude."

Feng Yin, who had been silently examining Tian Shen’s sleeve, suddenly narrowed her eyes.

"It’s leaking again."

"Leaking?"

Sure enough, golden mist was seeping from the hidden folds of his robe. Soft and hazy, it danced like celestial fog, drawing in nearby Qi and—worse—attention.

A nearby squirrel cultivating in the treetop froze mid-bite, turned its tiny head, and promptly prostrated.

Tian Shen stared in horror.

"What the hell?!"

Feng Yin deadpanned.

"Your pet is being worshipped."

"I can see that myself, princess."

He grabbed his sleeve and stuffed the mist down, gently patting the lump inside like a panicked parent hiding contraband snacks before dinner.

"I can’t keep hiding it like this."

"Well," Feng Yin said, brushing her sleeves off. "Just stay at home then. Nobody will come knocking anyways."

"Hmm... Not a bad one..."

"Anyways, Elder Su said we’re forbidden from stepping into any sect facility until further notice."

"That doesn’t sound like a break. That sounds like punishment."

Feng Yin shrugged.

Little Mei perked up.

"That means... date night!"

"No."

"Shopping!"

"No."

"Adventuring!"

"No."

"...Secret divine beast feeding mission?"

"...Ugh. Fine."

...

Thus, Tian Shen found himself trudging through the forested outer edge of Feilun Sect, one hand clutched over his chest like a man shielding his heart—and the divine chick snoring against it.

Feng Yin walked beside him, calm and regal as always.

Little Mei skipped ahead, humming a tune, occasionally jumping on random rocks or sniffing trees like a curious spirit fox.

"Why are we here again?"

Tian Shen muttered.

"To find food."

Feng Yin replied.

"The chick needs nutrients, special ones, and we’re too poor for the good stuff in the sect."

"There are herbs here?"

He asked.

"Not exactly herbs."

She pointed toward a winding path leading up a moss-covered slope.

"There’s an old spring up there. No longer maintained, but it doesn’t hurt to try, does it?."

Little Mei clapped her hands.

"I want soup!"

Tian Shen blinked.

"You mean we’re feeding it that?"

"Why not?"

Feng Yin smiled.

"The little thing’s cultivation seems to increase just by breathing. You might as well nourish it the proper way."

"And I suppose this is your way of teaching me to care for my spiritual companions?"

"No," Feng Yin teased.

"This is my way of keeping your divine bird from wiping out our sect with baby sneezes."

And weirdly, it was reasonable enough.

As they climbed higher, Tian Shen felt the ambient Qi grow thicker. Trees stood taller, their bark glowing faintly with residual energy.

Even the wind carried a soothing resonance, like faint harp strings played by the heavens.

Drowsy stirred, letting out a faint chirp.

Tian Shen paused.

"Feng Yin... it’s glowing again."

"Let it. Maybe it’ll incubate itself."

He muttered curses under his breath but kept walking.

Finally, they reached the spring.

Nestled between two glowing stones and surrounded by lotus-like plants, the spring shimmered with pale blue light.

The water rippled in slow, lazy waves despite there being no wind.

Tian Shen approached cautiously.

"Careful," Feng Yin warned. "The spring is peaceful, but if the chick misbehaves—"

Splash!

Too late.

Drowsy had somehow wriggled free, fluttered into the air with tiny, stubby wings, and faceplanted into the spring like a divine cannonball.

The water exploded in sparkles.

"DROWSY!"

Tian Shen lunged forward, only to stop midway.

The entire spring glowed gold.

A column of light erupted skyward, carving through the clouds.

For a moment, the world went silent. Birds stopped chirping. Leaves held their breath. The forest worshipped.

"...We’re dead," Tian Shen whispered.

Then the chick resurfaced, floating on its back like a smug duckling, chirping happily as it paddled in a pool of now-radiant liquid gold.

Feng Yin shielded her face.

"You’d better pretend this never happened."

"Agreed."

Little Mei leaned in, utterly delighted. "Golden Chicken soup! I want it!"

"No one’s making soup!"

Tian Shen said.

"No one’s eating it either!"

As if understanding, Drowsy let out a commanding chirp!—and the spring stilled, its glow retreating to a soft hum.

Tian Shen waded in carefully, scooping the chick up.

"Stop causing tribulations," he hissed.

Drowsy sneezed playfully.

The surrounding trees briefly lit up before returning to normal.

"Right," he said. "No more sneezing either."

Little Mei took out a notebook from her *Ahem* and began jotting down notes.

"Chicken reacts to spiritual water and it becomes golden chicken soup. Possibly spicy? Or maybe sour? Maybe even Little Mei’s favourite sweet chili flavour?!"

"Why are you writing down some nonsense, no, even first of, why do you even have a notebook with you?!?"

Tian Shen sulked.

"You don’t have to know that," Feng Yin added calmly.

"I have to know that!"

...

By the time they returned to the courtyard, the sun was setting, and Tian Shen was emotionally destroyed.

The chick had absorbed divine energy like a sponge, then promptly fell asleep again, this time snuggling up beneath his collar like a baby emperor.

Feng Yin brewed tea.

Little Mei drew a logo for her imaginary chicken sect mascot line of merchandise.

Tian Shen sat cross-legged under the tree, defeated but peaceful.

"...Maybe this life isn’t so bad," he murmured.

The chick farted divine mist which came straight in his face.

"...I take it back."

...

Meanwhile, far across the sect...

In the deepest parts of Celestial Sword Sect, in the inheritance chamber, an ancient jade, lying motionlessly, flickered ever so slightly.

It pulsed.

Faintly.

And the old record keeper—half asleep—muttered.

"Huh... the ’Chick of Celestial Calamity’... strange. Didn’t think that egg would hatch so soon..."

Then he went back to sleep.