Burning The House Of Cards: taking revenge on my billionaire family
Chapter 49 - 48. Sneaking Void

Chapter 49: Chapter 48. Sneaking Void

"Ugh..."

Sarah groaned; the headache came before she could even open her eyes. When she did, it felt heavy and rather sticky, as if she had been crying too much the night before. Thankfully, the room had a dim light, so she didn’t have to fight more incoming headache.

Massaging her temple groggily, Sarah suddenly became aware of the itchy feeling on the back of her hand. With a frown, she squinted her eyes at a small, circular adhesive bandage plastered there.

"What...is this?" Sarah looked around, belatedly realizing she wasn’t in her own room--not in the annex nor the hotel room connected to Helios. "Where am--ugh!"

Sarah curled up again when the headache came like an assault, clutching her throbbing head. Not only that, her throat was parched and aflame, as if she hadn’t touched water for days. Half-conscious, she scrambled to fetch a glass of water someone had generously placed on the nightstand.

Water splashed onto the sheet and down her throat as she gulped the water greedily. It felt cold against her skin, steadily pulling her mind out of the gutter.

And with it, the flood of memories from last night.

The memories of her attending the Circle’s meeting, exchanging her drink in fear it had been spiked, without knowing that the new drink was the one actually spiked with something.

It was ironic and disastrous. Sarah had no idea how she was able to hold on until Daniel came and ushered her to a safe space. Having been free of alcohol for years, she had no built-up resistance against it--or drugs, for that matter. Just a mouthful, and it wrecked her system already.

What would happen if she couldn’t hold on? If Daniel was stuck in his meeting and came later? Would she succumb to the effect and willingly follow the sleazy men and become a subject for their dark desire?

"Urk--"

A familiar sensation punched through her solar plexus and climbed up her esophagus. Sarah scrambled out of the bed and reached the wash basin on instinct and panic alone, retching out nothing but painful memories into the void.

A foul recording of her drugged, unconscious self on the bed, under her supposedly older ’brother’ resurfaced brutally, affecting not only her mind but her body.

As that memory played like a looped torture device on her mind, another, newer one surfaced; of her pulling Hajin to the bed and...

It stopped there. Sarah looked up and stared at her horrified expression in the mirror with shaking eyes. The reflection told her that she was in some kind of... night robe? Plain hospital gown?

Sarah had no idea. She frantically checked her skin for any visible marks to tell her what transpired last night, but she found nothing. The thing was...she had no idea whether she should be relieved or not.

Was it really a sign that nothing happened? She wanted to believe that nothing happened, that she could still trust the only person she decided to trust, but...

Sarah swallowed hard. "I need...I need to ask him--Hajin!"

She looked up, belatedly realizing that she couldn’t sense her bodyguard’s presence. There was no usual ’good morning’ or the shuffling sound of someone preparing her morning routine.

She frowned at the absence of an answer and staggered back to the bedroom suite. The soft humming of the air conditioner sounded so loud in her ear, amplifying how silent everything was. How empty.

"Hajin?" her breath hitched as her chest suddenly felt heavy. "Ryu Hajin!"

She called out desperately, and yet, there was only silence.

"Where..."

How stupid

"Ugh--"

Her head throbbed again, but what Sarah grasped this time was her ears.

Do you think people will ever take your side?

Who would want to stay with someone who killed her own mother?

Do you think he won’t throw you out once you become useless?

Voices, full of mockery and hatred, poured out of the corner she had been sealing. Voices of her siblings; voices of the wives; voices of the house staff...

You have no one, Lee Seul-ah

"Haa...haa..."

Sarah felt her throat constrict, and the ringing in her ears started to go deafening. Still, it couldn’t drown out the vicious voices haunting her dreams.

You have nothing

And the worst of it all...

You only have me

"Urk!" Sarah clasped her mouth; the ringing in her ears pierced her skull and made her feel like throwing up again. She crouched down, unshed tears stinging her reddened eyes, and invisible pain stabbed her leg like white hot iron.

As she struggled between lucid nightmares, the door--one located in an odd place and not where a hotel room door was usually placed--creaked open.

"Miss? Are you alright?"

Sarah looked up in confusion at the unfamiliar voice. Instead of Hajin, she saw two women in black suits looking at her from the door with concern. "W-who are you?"

"We’re the guard sent by--"

"Who are you?!" Sarah shouted, screamed before the woman could finish her explanation. Her anxious, nightmares-riddled mind sent her body into full rejection, backing away in panic. "Where’s my bodyguard?!"

"Uhh..."

The guards looked at each other with troubled eyes, and it only sent the panicking girl even further into misunderstanding.

Did he really leave her? Was he gone? Did he leave after satiating his desire with her body?

"Hajin!" Sarah let out a scream that would make passing people think she was being kidnapped.

The guards, only told that they should guard the room so people wouldn’t harm the young miss, were confused. The nurses and doctors had left after taking off the IV drip, and they had no idea how to face this reaction.

They were told that the young miss was mild-mannered, but this was nowhere near mild...

"Master?"

Suddenly, they heard a voice of salvation. The guards turned to look at the man who hurriedly ran past them, and they were too relieved when the young miss recognized the voice and the man that they didn’t mind him harshly nudging them sideways.

Hajin widened his eyes when he saw his master’s condition: eyes red and filled with tears, hands clutching her head and robe; lips trembling and cheeks the color of the sheet.

"I’m sorry--I meant to return before you’re awa--"

SLAP!

Hajin froze as his cheek was stung by a trembling palm. More than the physical pain, however, it stung in his heart more. His conscience, however, told him he deserved that and more.

"Where were you?!" Sarah panted heavily, her voice trembled with anger. "How dare you leave me with strangers!"

Hajin glanced at the other guards, and they understandingly retreated, closing the door tightly behind them. Looking back at Sarah, Hajin could see that his master was not in a good mental space. She was scared, she was confused, she was angry.

But who wouldn’t be, after such a horrid experience?

How foolish. He should have known to return quickly in case Sarah woke up earlier than usual.

But...telling her the real reason for his departure felt like it might open a whole floodgate of bad memories, so Hajin bit the inside of his cheek and made an excuse.

"I was...looking for breakfast," he said, even though his hands were clearly empty.

But it wasn’t like Sarah had a mind to check it.

"You shouldn’t leave without my permission!" she screamed again, and Hajin immediately went to his knees in front of the girl.

"Forgive me," he said as gently as possible, holding his master’s trembling hands. "I’ve committed a grave mistake. Please forgive me, Master," he brought her tensed hands to his forehead, pleading sincerely. "It won’t happen again."

The response came in a trembling hiss. "If you leave again, don’t bother coming back."

"It will never happen," Hajin looked up, letting her see the sincerity in his eyes. "I promise."

Sarah took a deep, stuttered breath before muttering sharply. "Bath."

"Right away," Hajin nodded, reluctantly letting go of his master’s hand.

He hurriedly prepared the almost scalding bath that Sarah always took, sighing heavily as he waited for the water to fill.

"Haa..." he gritted his teeth, confused about what he should do.

He had been busy running around that he failed to think about Sarah’s reaction to everything. The one who got hurt the most from this was her, and Hajin knew he contributed to that pain. Even if he managed to control himself not to take it further, he did succumb to temptation at first.

For his master, who called for him looking for help, wouldn’t it feel like betrayal?

Hajin felt his heart drop to his stomach when he came out to see his master wiping her eyes with the sleeve of her robe. He could feel how cold and pale those hands were, the way they were trembling in fright and anger.

With a strained, heavy breath, Hajin told his master that the bath was ready, and she walked past him as if he were invisible.

Sarah wasted no time plunging into the scalding bath, once again wishing the heat could wash away the invisible filth on her skin. Washing away her sin. Washing away the mud and poison inside her heart.

She scrubbed her arms, her legs, her chest...rubbing away until they were red. Still, the filth refused to go away, persistently clinging to her soul.

"Ugh--"

Tears fell down her cheeks, even while she was trying to calm herself down. She knew she was being childish, venting out her anxiety and frustration on Hajin.

It wasn’t his fault, she knew. She could tell from his face that they didn’t have sex last night. After peeling off the adhesive bandage from the back of her hand, she could see the trace of an IV injection, which meant she was being treated medically all night.

But the anxiety and the fear she didn’t know she had surfaced without warning. Before she could think of her situation calmly, her emotions took over and exploded.

The emotion and fear she couldn’t take back anymore.

She clasped her ears and closed her eyes as the voice of nightmares was ringing in her ears again.

Emotions--trivial emotions were a weakness. A weakness she must kill.

Sarah pushed her hands over her ears even harder as she sobbed, sliding under the water to drown out the voices, filling her senses with nothing but water.

Nothing but silence.

Oh, she wished she could just stay there for a long, long time. Perhaps forever, never to surface again--

Master!

A splashing sound invaded her silence as a hand held her neck and yanked her out of the lukewarm water.

"Master!"

Gasping for air, Sarah blinked and stared at a pair of terrified grey eyes.

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