(BL)Alpha Made
Chapter 132: Peace of mind

Chapter 132: Peace of mind

Andrew never expected the words to come out of Maxwell’s mouth. Honestly he knew that Maxwell was a relatively honest man, with a tendency to keep things to himself unless it was to get an upper hand over another, but he’d never expected that he would be at the other end of it.

Well, maybe a little bit, but not in this regard.

It also didn’t help that Maxwell looked like he was in so much pain. It almost distracted Andrew from what he was saying to him.

Maxwell, like one of his exes, had tried to...baby trap him.

Andrew felt conflicted. There was a part of him that he knew was pissed. He was angry that Maxwell, whether intentionally or not, had tried to do that to him. As a man, and as someone who considered himself a responsible, good person, that was awful. It felt like Maxwell was taking a part of him without his consent.

If it was only the one time and then Maxwell got pregnant, then Andrew would have felt differently, but Maxwell was currently standing before him, filled with his spent passions and was telling him to his face that the pills might not work.

Andrew, before he’d awoken as a true alpha, hadn’t been sure he wanted kids. He’d come off having watched his Mother literally wither away from neglect, and that had been very traumatic for him. He didn’t speak of it, but he’d gone to therapy when he lived in England. He even used a fake name because he was worried someone would find out.

It had taken a lot for him to recover from that. To even think of his Mom without having night terrors. She’d haunted him for years since he couldn’t even afford to go to her grave on the anniversary of her death. He’d comforted himself by saying that was the very least his father could have done, but he knew better.

That man had never once visited her grave. He’d only sent flowers on the day of her funeral, and he couldn’t have even bothered himself to show up.

It was shortly after that that a woman had tried to baby trap him. She had seen his height, what he was taking in school and the fact that he was on a full ride recruitment into his department and apparently seen dollar signs. Andrew hadn’t known it at the time, but he was apparently a full meal package, but back then?

He’d been furious. He couldn’t even remember half of the conversation he’d had with her, but it had left her shivering, trembling as she took the test. Andrew had felt sick to his stomach after that, but thankfully, it came back negative. He had apologized for his response the next day, and even explained some of why he had responded that way. They both had felt horrible over the experience, and never spoke to each other again.

It appeared that she was now happily married to a rich business owner in Germany and had several kids. With his luck, Maxwell probably knew her.

So Andrew knew how he should feel. But that had been years ago, and this was Maxwell. It appeared that he hadn’t even been aware of what he was doing until recently. Maxwell might be...dishonest in some regards, but he wasn’t a liar.

He couldn’t believe that the man who had cried when Andrew had been hurting himself would go out of his way to try to hurt him this way. Maybe Maxwell had some things going on with his secondary sex that they should look into?

It wouldn’t be out of nowhere to say that Andrew could be impacting Maxwell in a similar way that Maxwell was impacting Andrew. It would actually, in a fucked up way, make Andrew feel better. Closer to him if Maxwell was feeling a pull towards him.

Andrew wouldn’t deny that he’d had an impulse to fill Maxwell up with his seed. He’d admitted wanting to own him, possess him, confine him to a place where only Andrew knew where he was. It was a strange, new impulse, and one that terrified him, but he was doing his best to be honest with himself, and with others.

So, maybe this was Maxwell attempting to do the same?

If that was the case, there was no way Andrew could be as angry as he was the last time this had happened. He was shocked, yes, but he wasn’t angry. That did surprise him, but looking at Maxwell who had wet, blue eyes, his lips trembling, and barely holding his pheromones, let alone his body in check, there was no way that Andrew couldn’t find his admittance sincere.

The man was terrified of Andrew’s response.

Andrew did feel anger well up inside of him when he dared to even compare himself to Tracey. That anger felt fresh, bright, and filled his whole chest.

How fucking dare he even consider the thought? There was no way the two of them were even slightly related. They weren’t even in the same category? Tracey had lied to him about returning his laptop, which he hadn’t even gotten back in the end, and Maxwell had followed through with his taking of the pills, he had just been hoping that they didn’t work. Those were not related things!

Plus, Andrew hadn’t been tortured by Maxwell to extract his semen. Not a single damn time. Not in the way that Maxwell was worried about. He’d very much enjoyed himself each time. The man was just trying to find fault in himself, and Andrew was not going to stand for it.

But it was clear, the more they spoke, that something was wrong. Maxwell’s words were coming out slower and slower, with larger gaps in between until he went non verbal.

Panic, sharp and acidic, filled Andrew’s mouth. Holy fuck. Something was clearly wrong, but Andrew didn’t want to leave Maxwell alone in case it was something that could make him freak out.

He got even more concerned when Maxwell released him and turned, moving towards the table set up for the dinner Maxwell must have arranged for them. It was like watching a character in a video game move without Andrew directing them.

A shiver went down his spine as Maxwell pulled the chair out, sat down, and began to cut up his food. He really couldn’t leave him after that. Not when he felt so unsettled, and worried.

This was so unlike him, and so strange, that Andrew just sat down across from him and began to eat as well. It would do him no good if he was hungry and unable to help Maxwell through whatever the hell was happening to him.

It also appeared that through the normal action, Maxwell was slowly waking him. Relief filled him when it appeared that Maxwell was with him again. Maxwell’s expression as he realised he was sitting down, cutting his food up into small, precise pieces, told Andrew that this either wasn’t a normal thing to happen, or had never happened before.

No one was that confused if this was a common experience, and Andrew had never witnessed it before. He’d been living with the man for a full month and this had never happened before, and hadn’t witnessed it in the time he’d been working as his bodyguard either. It also felt like something Maxwell would have mentioned in that regard.

Concern coated Andrew’s every breath. He needed to speak to Michael about this.

Maxwell, however, was very good at convincing him not to leave right away, and Andrew found himself hand-feeding the man with Maxwell sitting in his lap before he knew it.

The damn man clearly didn’t want to alert anyone, but that only made Andrew more worried.

As soon as they were fed, dressed, and back in for the third reception, Andrew was making a beeline to Michael, with Maxwell in tow. He was so serious when it came to Andrew’s health, but when it came to his own health? Maxwell didn’t care at all as long as it didn’t affect his ability to work.

The few days after his heat were a clear example of that.

Andrew was pissed. If Maxwell had been trying to baby trap him, like he said that he had, he should be taking care of himself so that he didn’t lose the possible baby. It made Andrew unreasonably mad, and Andrew wasn’t sure why until he met Maxwell’s slightly wet blue eyes again.

There were so many things that could go wrong, and he’d just gotten this small bit of peace with him. He had somewhat balanced out his pheromones, he could go out in public with the aid of a few pills and some good old fashioned monitoring. He could start going to work soon, and making money again without feeling like a burden to Maxwell.

Yet Maxwell had wanted to change that dynamic with a child. A child of a true alpha and an omega, and there was a part of him, the sad, broken part that wondered if that was only the case because he was an alpha now, and Maxwell wouldn’t have wanted the same thing if he was still a beta?

That hurt was still there, even if Andrew knew it was foolish and realised that Maxwell had never hidden his feelings from Andrew. Andrew just had intentionally and unintentionally never read into the signs and hints Maxwell had been dropping. But it was a worry he had nonetheless. And one that made him want to make sure that Maxwell was well taken care of, even if the thought that Maxwell could have a baby inside of him terrified him.

He was already in group therapy for being a neglected kid of a rich father/mother, he worried how much more therapy he needed if Maxwell ended up pregnant right now.

Fuck, Ben would kill him if he took away this time from Amir. Amir was such a good man, and deserved the care he was receiving after having a miscarriage. Maxwell as the baby of the family would take that thunder away. What had Maxwell been thinking? Had he even been thinking?

Dammit, he didn’t want to be angry at him right now, especially when he wasn’t doing okay. They really needed to finish eating and get Maxwell in front of Michael for his peace of mind.