Chapter 206: 206
The air smelled like strawberries and cookies.
The room was warm and still, the way it got under his blankie back home when Mommy tucked him in. Not too hot. Not cold. Just... okay.
That’s how Leo knew he was in his happy place. He sat cross-legged on the soft, fuzzy rug that hadn’t been there before. His chubby fingers gripped a red race car, and he pushed it in slow circles around an invisible track, complete with sound effects. "Vroom... vrooooom!"
All around him, tall shelves stretched up and up and up; he didn’t remember those being here either. They were filled with most of the things that were on the floor before.
And then—
A bad man.
Leo sniffled. His truck slipped from his hand. His face scrunched up and he wiped his nose with the back of his sleeve.
He didn’t like thinking about the man. The mean one who hurt Mommy. The one with the scary eyes
His tummy felt twisty.
Not like when he ate too many marshmallows. Not like when he was sleepy.
And Leo knew he wasn’t sleepy.
He just didn’t know what else to do.
He scooted his car in a circle one more time, then let it rest on the rug. His legs stuck out, toes wiggling inside socks that didn’t match. That was okay. Mommy said it was okay if the socks didn’t match.
The ceiling wasn’t really a ceiling. It looked like sky. Sometimes, when he blinked, he thought he saw clouds move. But maybe that was just his brain being fuzzy. Things felt fuzzy a lot lately.
Leo looked around the space. The first time he came here, it was just a small room. He was sure this room hadn’t been so big before.
Now there were shelves. Rows of them. As tall as Daddy used to be. All because he wanted somewhere to hide. The shelves had shown up when he got scared.
His bottom lip stuck out as he thought. "Big... big room," he mumbled. "I made it big."
He picked at a string on the rug. Something inside his tummy felt funny. Not sick, but twisty. Like when Mommy told him something big and grown-up and he didn’t really understand but pretended to.
He looked at his hand, the little fingers that had pulled open the invisible door to come here, and whispered, "Magic?"
Mommy did say he was special, and Uncle called him a hero, so this must be his power!
His eyes lit up excitedly at the thought. Then dimmed with sadness.
He wanted to hug his bear but bear was missing now, maybe he forgot bear outside. He found a bunny in the corner and grabbed it.
The walls were smooth and dark, like the inside of a big box, but the kind of box that didn’t feel scary. Not like the tunnels.
He didn’t like the tunnels.
Leo’s nose wrinkled, and he clutched Mr. Bunny tighter. His big brown eyes, framed by messy dark curls, glanced around the space. His space. It felt safe. Quiet. He liked the quiet. It made his head not hurt. It made the scary pictures go away.
He sat for a long time, humming softly under his breath. His lips moved with the song Mama always sang when he was sleepy. He couldn’t remember all the words, but he remembered the warm sound of her voice, and that was enough.
Leo scooted closer to the back of the room, past the pillow and the crayons, to where a wall shimmered with soft shadows. He remembered there being a door, but not with light coming out from under it like it was doing now.
Golden light.
He reached out.
His hand didn’t get to it. He pouted and toddled off to find an uppy thing.
He reached out again, sticking his tongue out as he stretched. He gasped happily as he touched the edge.
The handle was round. Cold. It didn’t fit his hand right.
Leo tugged. The door didn’t move.
He tugged again.
It shook, a little, like it wanted to open. But something stopped it. Something not-here.
His breath puffed out. "Ugh. Open."
Then he paused. The twisty feeling in his tummy got worse.
"Mommy said..." he scrunched his face, trying to remember. It was hard. All the loud noise had made it hard to think. The yelling. The running. Her hand in his.
The boom-boom-boom of her heart when she carried him through the tunnels.
"Don’t open," he whispered. "Not until... safe."
His hand dropped from the handle.
He sat down next to the glowing door. Not touching it anymore. Just thinking.
He missed her.
He missed her a lot.
He didn’t know how long he’d been here. He didn’t want to go back outside because it was scary outside. But he wanted his mommy.
Where was Mommy?
Was she hurt again?
Was the bad man outside the door?
What if... what if he forgot how to get back?
He sniffled again and wiped his cheeks. His thumb slipped into his mouth and he sucked on it, something he hadn’t done in weeks, but it made him feel better now. Just a little.
He looked up. The clouds moved again. This time, he was sure.
"Mommy got hurt," he said softly. "She cried. I saw it."
He hugged his knees. Something warm bloomed behind his eyes. "The bad man... he hurted her. I don’t like him."
The lights in the room dimmed. Just a little. The glow under the door flickered.
Leo blinked. "Uh-oh."
The rug beneath him felt less soft. The shelves seemed farther away.
"No sad," he said, trying to sound firm like Winter. "No cry."
The room didn’t like sad.
Leo sucked in a deep breath and let it out slow, like Mommy taught him when his heart got jumpy. "’Kay. I’m okay. Gotta be brave."
He stood up, dusted imaginary dust from his knees, and walked around the space.
There were boxes now. Lots of them. Plastic ones, with lids. Some labeled with big letters he didn’t know yet.
He peeked inside a few. Nothing he wanted.
His eyes wandered to the boxes near the wall. He wondered if there was something in there that could help. Maybe another blankie. Or food. Or a phone, like the kind Mommy always talked into.
He crawled toward the nearest box and peeked inside.
Clothes.
Big ones.
It smelled weird. He made a face. "Ew."
He pulled out a crayon from a nearby bin and found a wall panel made of soft paperboard. He started drawing. Circles. Lots of circles. That was him. The little circle. And the bigger circle was Mama. And the really, really big one with a sword? That was Uncle. He liked Uncle. Uncle gave good hugs but also smelled nice.
After a while, Leo stopped drawing.
He sat with his legs crossed and stared ahead. The light in the corner—the one that came from underneath the very big door—glowed gold. It flickered sometimes, like candlelight, but it was warm. Like the sun through the window when Mama let him nap on her lap.
His eyebrows furrowed. His mouth turned down.
"Why..." he mumbled, curling into himself a bit. "Why... monsters?"
He remembered running.
His little hands trembled. Not from cold. From remembering. From the loud sounds. From the angry voices. From the bang that made Mama fall.
He hadn’t liked that part.
One of the shelves had moved. Just a little. He crawled toward it and peeked into the space behind. There was a chest now. One of those big ones like pirates used. He opened it slowly. Inside? His Mama’s old sweater. The blue one with the hole in the sleeve.
He pushed the lid closed and crawled back to his mat. Maybe if he closed his eyes, the scary feelings would go away.
He hadn’t liked that part.
His chest tightened and his throat made a little sound, like a squeaky toy being stepped on. Leo sniffled and wiped his nose with his sleeve again.
But then—
A sound.
His eyes flew open. Wide. Frozen.
Was that...?
Voices?
He scurried toward the glowing door again, dropping the bunny in his hurry. He pressed his ear against the metal, tiny palms flat against the surface.
"Leo...?"
His heart jumped.
That was...
"Mommy?" he squeaked.
He didn’t hear it again. His eyes welled up.
Then—
"Leo... baby, it’s Mama."
His heart exploded.
His hands flew to the handle again, yanking, tugging, whining softly as the door resisted him.
Another voice.
"Kiddo? You there, bud?"
That was Uncle!
"Leo? It’s Winter, buddy. We’re here. Can you hear us?"
Leo scrambled back, stood up, his little body bouncing with excitement. He ran in a circle, then stopped at the door again.
"Mama!" he shouted. "I’m here! I’m here!"
His hand went to the seam. He hesitated.
She told him not to open it.
But... maybe now was okay?
He looked at the golden light again.
And slowly... carefully... he reached for the door.
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