A Royal Obligation
Chapter 176: Guilt & Regrets (1)

Chapter 176: Guilt & Regrets (1)

Kaelix paced the cold stone floor of his chambers, his steps unsteady and his hands trembling. Two weeks.

Two excruciating weeks had passed, and still, there was no word, no trace, no sign of Eirik. He pressed his trembling hands to his face, fighting back the torrent of guilt and helplessness that had been building within him since that night.

Every corner of the room whispered Eirik’s presence, his touch lingered in the air, as though he might walk in at any moment with that familiar, gentle smile.

But there was only emptiness now, a suffocating void that gnawed at Kaelix’s heart and left him hollow. Eirik’s absence felt like a wound that would never heal, and Kaelix was beginning to wonder if he could go on without him.

He closed his eyes, memories slipping through his mind like sand. He could see Eirik’s face, lit by the soft morning light, his eyes filled with quiet joy as he leaned close, whispering, "We’re going to be a family, Kaelix. I’m pregnant."

The memory hit him like a punch to the chest. He sank onto the bed, feeling the weight of his failure settle deeper. Eirik had trusted him, relied on him, and yet Kaelix hadn’t been there when it mattered most. He’d left him vulnerable. He had left Eirik with Sadiki. "I’ll be back soon, stay here," he’d told Eirik, with absolute faith that he’d be safe in Sadiki’s hands.

But he’d returned to devastation, a disappearance that tore his world apart. The decision he’d made felt like a noose around his neck.

Kaelix’s heart clenched as he remembered the warmth of Eirik’s hand in his, the softness of his touch. The familiar smell of cedarwood lingered in the room, mixing with the lingering scent of Eirik’s favorite herbs. Kaelix reached out, as if he could catch hold of the memory, but it slipped through his fingers, leaving only pain behind.

He hadn’t eaten in days; sleep, when it came, was restless and shallow. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Eirik, felt his absence like a phantom ache. He’d been haunted by flashes of those final moments, replaying them over and over in his mind, torturing himself with "what ifs" and "if onlys."

The room felt stifling. Kaelix stood up, his hands clenching and unclenching as his emotions built into a storm. He paced again, the feeling of restlessness too overwhelming to contain. His anger toward Sadiki pulsed within him, boiling like the fire that had first torn them apart that night. Sadiki had known, he’d known about the pregnancy, yet he’d betrayed them both. The thought of Sadiki’s betrayal made Kaelix’s hands curl into fists. He had trusted that guard, had believed that Sadiki would protect Eirik in his absence.

"I left him with you," Kaelix whispered, his voice barely more than a tremor. "I trusted you."

The words were swallowed by the silence, but it didn’t matter. His accusations echoed in his own mind, each one cutting deeper than the last.

He wandered to the small table by the window, where Eirik had spent hours crafting small trinkets and amulets, often gifting one to Kaelix with a shy smile. There was one amulet, a delicate piece carved from dark wood, that lay there still, a charm Eirik had crafted for their child. Kaelix picked it up, his hands shaking as he ran his fingers over the intricate details. Eirik had poured his heart into that amulet, his joy, his love.

The memory hit him like a wave. He remembered Eirik’s face, alight with excitement as he’d handed it to him. "For our child," he’d said, his voice a soft murmur. "To protect them."

Kaelix bit his lip, the taste of blood sharp and metallic. How could he protect their child if he couldn’t even protect Eirik? He clutched the amulet tightly, a promise and a reminder, as his body shook with the weight of his guilt and anger.

Time seemed meaningless. Day bled into night, and night into day, yet Kaelix refused to leave his chambers. Servants came and went, their voices hushed and concerned, but he ignored them all, his mind consumed with only one thing, finding Eirik. Nothing else mattered. Not his own well-being, not the countless pleas from his father, not even the duty that still awaited him. Every fiber of his being was singularly focused on one mission: for Eirik to be found, safe and whole.

Another night passed, and Kaelix found himself sitting in the dim light, eyes red and raw from sleeplessness, as more memories assaulted him. He remembered the quiet nights they had spent together, whispering their dreams for the future.

He remembered Eirik’s laughter, the way his eyes sparkled as he talked about their child, the way he’d absently rested a hand on his abdomen as though protecting the life growing within him. Kaelix felt tears prick his eyes as he realized he might never see that joy again.

Another wave of anger hit him, this one sharp and bitter. Sadiki had taken all of that from him, from them. He’d taken Kaelix’s love, his family, his future. And for what? Kaelix’s chest tightened, his breathing shallow as the enormity of the betrayal settled over him.

But then came the fear. The gnawing, paralyzing fear that Eirik was out there somewhere, suffering, perhaps hurt, and there was nothing Kaelix could do about it. The thought haunted him, tore at his heart until he could barely breathe.

He gripped the amulet tighter, his knuckles white. He would find Eirik. He had to. But every moment that passed felt like a blade slicing deeper, a reminder of his failure. How long had Eirik been waiting for him? How many days had he spent in fear, wondering why Kaelix hadn’t come for him?

Suddenly, Kaelix’s shoulders slumped, his strength draining away as the weight of his emotions bore down on him. He slumped onto the bed, burying his face in his hands, his whole body wracked with silent sobs. The tears came freely now, his grief and guilt spilling over as he mourned the absence of the one person who had completed him.

"Eirik... please, where are you?" He whispered, his voice breaking. "I just want you back."

Follow current novels on freewe(b)novel.c(o)m